Fairness

Soulful

life is good
MBTI
Someone once said to me,"Well it (life) is neither fair nor unfair. It just is."

I find myself going back and forth with this. I understand how fairness is a personal judgment we apply to situations, based on our expectations. Some expectations are ones we could do without. But then there are those that are based on the desire for circumstances such as personal safety, human dignity, equality, and so on.

Would it be of any benefit to maintain a belief that life is neither fair nor unfair, it just is? While I believe that a situation is neither inherently fair nor unfair, it only becomes so once we judge it - is it really possible to suspend our judgments? Is it counter-productive to judge circumstances as fair or unfair?
 
I'd say that since a concept of fairness is ingrained into most societies and seems inherent in people - small children especially have a gift of knowing what is fair - then to say that life simply is, ignores an issue that is meaningful to many of us. Experience in life suggests that life is unfair, and I think it is important to accept this as a given in order to live at peace with ourselves, whilst simultaneously retaining a concept of fairness to enable us to contribute towards a fairer world.
 
Experience in life suggests that life is unfair, and I think it is important to accept this as a given in order to live at peace with ourselves, whilst simultaneously retaining a concept of fairness to enable us to contribute towards a fairer world.

I couldn't agree more. I really like how you put this.
 
I think it is more accurate to say life is unfair.
 
i'm not sure that children are qualified to decide what is fair or unfair. a child might feel that she has been unfairly treated if she has been denied an unreasonable request. and i think it's important to recognise and come to terms with our own feelings of being unfairly treated. the world is an unjust place with many inequalities. but apart from this, i think it's important to keep in mind that fairness is a human construct, in order that we can question it. many people throughout history and in different cultures have considered certain treatments of individuals or groups to be fair, which we would now find barbaric and revolting. there are ways each of us have of treating other people which we perceive as fair, yet others might perceive as unfair. i think it's important to keep in mind how subjective an issue fairness can really be, in order that we can examine our motives and values, and strive to treat one another more fairly, and find a more true path to equality.

[edit: there are still many disgusting and unfair injustices perpetrated on the innocent everywhere by people who think they are being fair!]
 
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sorry elf i just realised that i'm probably trying to say largely the same thing as you. sorry i should have read your post more carefully.
 
I don't think life is fair or unfair. Situations are fair and unfair. Life is a combination of these situations, so I suppose you could say that if the majority of situations are fair, then life is fair, and same with unfairness.

But life is not always decisive. Fair and unfair would imply that there was some sort of option or conscious will behind the situation; if the situation was chance and circumstance, then it'd be hard to call it fair or unfair, because there wasn't anything behind it that was for or against you. If someone is impartial, they are fair; if someone is biased, they are unfair. If it is just an unfortunate circumstance, then it is that, and fair and unfair is not really applicable.
 
I think it would be a benefit to think as the op prescribes. It sets no expectation as to how the world should be, but it does show someone that the world simply exists as is (no guarantees implied).

You could always strive towards fairness as an ideal though. Even if life isn't fair, you can still try to be.
 
If life was fair, I would be allowed to kill the wilfully illiterate.
 
It can be useful for accepting the past and moving on.

But it is not always a useful concept, holding that idea as absolute is a bad thing. nut then again so is holding the exact opposite.
 
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I firmly believe that life is fair, that we get what we deserve. And every experience is meaningful in the context of greater understanding.

I have heard a different version of the opening quote: that there are no good or bad happenings in life - things just are. To that I agree.
 
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I firmly believe that life is fair, that we get what we deserve. And every experience is meaningful in the context of greater understanding.

I have heard a different version of the opening quote: that there are no good or bad happenings in life - things just are. To that I agree.
If people get what they deserve, is there any role for compassion in any situation? If suffering is fair then compassion would seem like a disregard for fairness.
 
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If people get what they deserve, is there any role for compassion in any situation? If suffering is fair then compassion would seem like a disregard for fairness.

Compassion is as fair as suffering is in my opinion. So if you happen to be in a position where you can give compassion then of course it has a very important role.

For practical reasons I limit my good will for those who appreciate it. So I avoid giving compassion to people who blame their misfortunes on other people, unfortunate circumstances, fate etc. Because they would just take it for granted and continue to suffer inside.
 
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