Happy Phantom
Well-known member
- MBTI
- INFJ
Someone mentioned this phrase to me yesterday and I'm not convinced this is a true statement. She was referring to a romantic relationship, so "friends" don't count for me. I'm still thinking about this...
You really never know people which makes trusting them difficult. Things can go from good, to bad, to worse quickly, or over a period of time. If I hate someone because we have unresolved issues, I'm also allowing them to negatively misuse my time and energy. I don't need to love or hate anyone when I can just accept they exist.I don't think it's too relevant in the context of a healthy relationship because there are so many other qualifiers/quantifiers of things, but in terms of the scientific understanding of the emotional/chemical states that love and hate create it really is a thin line. The switch from one to the other is not far at all, which is different when comparing other emotional contrasts. I think this is perhaps specifically more the case between lustful love and vengeful hate.
I had to think about this a bit before I really got it. Good quote."If we can't fuck it, we'll kill it" ~Robin Williams
Someone mentioned this phrase to me yesterday and I'm not convinced this is a true statement. She was referring to a romantic relationship, so "friends" don't count for me. I'm still thinking about this...
When done correctly/purely, the line is not thin at all.
I think the reason people see it as a thin line is because when someone you love does something inconsiderate/ wrong (either to you or someone else), you dislike it more than when it comes from someone you dislike or don't know. Wrongful behavior stings more coming from someone you love, and you hate the behavior, not them, more for it. When you love someone, you want the best for them. You accept them where they are at, but you also want and encourage them to grow.
I'm not sure I agree with this (it perhaps depends on the situation), but it seems relevant: "The opposite of love isn't hate, it's indifference."
@INFJ16 brought up a good point, but for me, love is more forgiving. If someone you love does something wrong you're more willing to listen, take part in a healing process, and (depending on what it is) help them.
A lot of hurt comes from our perceptions about love, loyalty, and what is right and wrong, allowable or not, and from our perceptions about people. Unless it is an abusive situation, it is our responsibility to maintain perspective. Relationships (whether friendship or romantic) can mask perspective.
Love and hate? I still don't think so.... but love and pain, yes, absolutely, because of what @INFJ16 said. That's why they call it heartbreak.