Thoughts About Te (Dom/Aux)

[Broken705]

I have briefly mentioned some communication problems that I've had with people who have extraverted thinking (as the dominate or auxiliary function). Here I will go into more detail.

This is what I am interested to know from the people who use this forum, particularly INFJs or Ti dom/aux's:

 

[Peppermint]

I'm a Ti user.

My experience with the Te's has taught me that they value efficiency and competency a lot in people. You're literally not on their radar of consideration if you're not a worthwhile contributor. At the most superficial level they don't care about people in a personal sense (read: they don't care about their emotions), they care about what people can do and how it's relevant to their thing. Over time their appreciation of people becomes directly correlated to their relevant competency.

They aren't entirely insensitive, they tend to have a few people they do care about and will bend their backs to help them in a truly utilitarian fashion.

They probably do think you're an idiot, though it may not mean they feel superior about it. Sometimes they just want to see the best possible way to accomplish something, regardless of who does it, meaning they aren't particularly personally invested in this accomplishment. The thing is, they get incredibly frustrated if people aren't performing up to par, and may try to err push them to it, sometimes in an insensitive way.

STJ's are kind of a lost case for me because of their single mindedness, but I get along well with NTJs.

Take this with a grain of salt though.

 

[Saru Inc]

hi uhhh poeple with black background cant read your post

 

[aerosol]

as a general rule, i have problems with Te users.

i started typing out a personal story but then realized that posting it would be unfair to ESTJs.

 

[Arsal]

I get along well with IxTJs. One of my good friends is ISTJ.

A few things I've learned:

1. There is a rigidly defined line between "acquaintance" and "friend".
2. They will not accept you as a "friend" unless they are sure you will be loyal to them your entire life.
3. If they like you, they will tell you.
4. They do not consider favors as debt to be re-payed compulsorily. (Fe-users do.)
5. Goodwill and niceness is internal, not external.
6. They are very susceptible to emotional manipulation.

I have not interacted with ExTJs long enough to form an opinion, but generally, everything my aunt says (ESTJ) irks the shit out of me, so there.

I am an Fe-user.

 

[technics]

I don

 

[aerosol]

oh, actually, to elaborate - i don't mind ISTJs and i love INTJs.

Te dom, though. GAH. ENTJs and ESTJs just do not work well at all with me.

 

[bickelz]

I like dealing with ntj's because they just get things when you try to explain it to them. Easy.

 

[MikeA]

I'm easily annoyed, and always, always condescending.

 

[Jana]

My dearest friend is ESTJ...Not inspite or because of Te...I love her, but I had to get used to her being direct and insensibile sometimes. It is just surface...really...she can be sensibile and vulnerable
I have and ISTJ thing as well, same as with ESTJ...

 

[VH]

More times than I can count, I have found myself thinking "If one more muthafuckin Te dom tries to delegate and domineer me today, someone's neck is getting snapped." Unhealthy Te pushes my buttons like nothing else can.

However, I've developed a very strong respect for healthy Te. That's good stuff right there.

 

[Jana]

However, I've developed a very strong respect for healthy Te. That's good stuff right there.

Agree

Yes, Te likes to be bossy. But I learned that best way for dealing with that if it annoys me is to say them as a joke something like "OK, boss" or "No, Boss" or make fun of it, but in healthy way fun. For less tensions...

 

[Broken705]

I like dealing with ntj's because they just get things when you try to explain it to them. Easy.

Well, I've actually had a problem with explaining things to INTJs- always wondering if I'm making sense to them.

Unfortunatley, the more I worry about not making sense the more emotional I become and the less sense I make. :Cry:

But with that being said...

From my experience, ISTJs are actually the most polite, most disciplined and well-behaved TJs. But they are, I think, also the most conservative TJs, or even type. As for stupidity: I don't know about the other TJs, but I never saw people as stupid.

I think dominant Te gives the person an aura of being driven by it: they just have to plan and execute and do, no matter what. It's an end. My former ESTJ boss was like that: We drafted plans after plans on the flipchart, then he gave it to me so I could realize it, but a month later he totally forgot those plans.

As an auxiliary I think it's more of a means to an end. For me, for example, Te is like a tool. I have my ideas and when I look upon the world I see resources that can be moved and arranged to fulfill my plan, even people. That metaphor of reality as a chessboard fits very well.

As for personal values: yes, that's true. For example, the classic-liberal TJs I know have some values that are far (very far) from the liberal image that they assume themselves to be. In the end, they all want to see it done their way. Even in forums, when the ENTJs say they don't consider their own emotions and just want to see it done efficiently, I just have to roll my eyes.

It sounds like everything I said made sense to this INTJ. So I see that as a good sign.

Oh, and we hate drama. It's really a burden.

Yeah, and unfortunatley, I've got a lot of that. And it does come out sometimes.