Why some qualities attractive and not others?

[Gaze]

Why some qualities attractive and not others?

I was just thinking about the reasons why some qualities about a person will draw our interest, while others for no apparent reason won't.

Are you conscious about why some qualities or traits are appealing to you while others aren't or does it simply happen usually without you being aware of the reason or explanation?

 

[Zero Angel]

I think attractive qualities are qualities that people wish they had. Many are centered around 'courage' but others are centered around skill. If something represents an ideal I have but do not feel I am living up to, I will be more likely to admire that quality in someone else.

 

[Gaze]

I think attractive qualities are qualities that people wish they had. Many are centered around 'courage' but others are centered around skill. If something represents an ideal I have but do not feel I am living up to, I will be more likely to admire that quality in someone else.

Agree, that much of it has to do with the qualities we admire. For example, i'm attracted to people who have a quiet ease, or easy going personality becuase i know i'm quite the opposite, at least internally. They reflect what I would like to feel in that chaotic inner world.

 

[dream echo]

This question makes me wonder about relationships that become frustrating when our perspective of what is attractive changes. It is said that qualities that once drew you to another individual become the ones that you find difficult to tolerate.

It would make sense then, to suppose that those qualities that we are attracted to in someone else are indeed ones that we don't possess.

One of the things that drew me to my husband was his ability to make me laugh and not take things so seriously. He's a very light-hearted person; very laid back. This is a characteristic I don't naturally have, and being around him would relax me and help me out of my depression. However, it drives me absolutely crazy when I'm upset with something and he's constantly trying to make me laugh to lighten my mood. I get irritated when he doesn't take me seriously when I feel the situation requires it.

It makes me think of the magnetic push/pull attraction you see with magnets. The power draws you in, but will eventually repel.