Alienation

I was lost and lonely before I found this place. I did have friends, but we all know how that is... they can't really understand you. I never told them anything remotely INFJ about myself, except for my ENFP friend. They wouldn't have gotten it. They couldn't even understand when I didn't want to hang out with them anymore, because I needed time to recharge after months of living in an extroverted manner. It really took a lot out of me.

*sigh* Extroverts.

Anyway, I'm a lot happier in my life, now. Sometimes, that curiosity about the grass being greener on the other side, it grows so strong that you have to venture to see if it really is or not.

Does anyone else get really, really pissed when people call you "weird?" For fuck's sake, I know I'm weird. Didn't have to point that one out; it's been coming my whole life. It's one of the few things that really gets to me.
 
I wish I had someone to just sit quietly in the dark and listen to Beethoven's 7th Symphony.

I wish I had someone who enjoyed walking in beautiful gardens without talking.

I wish just one of my friends would pray with me sometimes.

I wish I knew someone who shared my fascination with animal psychology (chimps are eeeeevil!)

I wish I knew people who like to dress up in vintage clothing from other eras and have dinner and dance.

You get the idea. What good is experiencing something beautiful and meaningful when you have no one to share it with?

Omg. I would love to do all these things with you.

This is why I love INFJs, especially spending time with them irl.

So many of my INFJ friends that I used to be close with via being in the same group of friends yet where we've become attached to each other in particular have either drifted away from the general group (they seem to be group migraters)(and so I think too shy to talk to me one on one unless I initiate anymore because our opportunities for interaction have been sporadic) or become really reclusive and I miss them.
 
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Omg. I would love to do all these things with you.

This is why I love INFJs, especially spending time with them irl.

So many of my INFJ friends that I used to be close with via being in the same group of friends yet where we've become attached to each other in particular have either drifted away from the general group (they seem to be group migraters)(and so I think too shy to talk to me one on one unless I initiate anymore because our opportunities for interaction have been sporadic) or become really reclusive and I miss them.
Initiating is hard because it's like, "well, what if she's doing something else? What if she actually doesn't want to spend time with me? I'll just be irritating her and making her feel obligated by asking..."

Other than that it seems spot on :/ Hope you manage to get back in touch somehow.
 
Initiating is hard because it's like, "well, what if she's doing something else? What if she actually doesn't want to spend time with me? I'll just be irritating her and making her feel obligated by asking..."

Yeah it's funny.. like I get this vibe from them whenever I talk to them that they feel bad for "not being there for me", if they don't say it outright. T_T then again i'd been very reclusive during when i was depressed so guess they felt awkward since they got out of the habit of talking to me.
 
I feel like an alien 99% of the time. Sometimes (very rarely) I like it. I feel like I have this secret no one knows. Mostly I just feel alone. Like I am this fly on a wall watching the world live but never really living in the world. Being an observer is fun at times, but then you get lonely. Like others I have at times forced myself to pretend that I am like everyone else my age going to random parties, hanging out with people who i'm only superficially friends with, etc. Trying to put on my extrovert face. It helps for a second but then at the end of the day I just feel like a cheap circus performer. No one else knows i'm fake but I do and it feels terrible. I'd rather stand by and be the freakishly sage observer than be fake any day. But it's not easy and people don't always get it. But when they do, you know they are your true friends.
 
I actually think it's the rest of the world that's full of disposable, metabolic flesh units behaving programmaticly; their vacant eye holes soaking up cathode ray propaganda and codifying it into absurd belief systems fueled by paradoxical neuroses. I regard myself as one of the few who took the red pill and are legitimately alive.
 
subwayrider;543381 [FONT=times new roman said:
*sigh* Extroverts. [/FONT]


Uhhh what the fuck man.


god, I'm sick of people acting like Extraverts have it so good. I fucking hate being an extravert. I hate having to depend on connection with an environment that will never be what I need it to be, I hate having to talk to people, just so I can steady myself. Being an extravert fucking sucks.

That being said, people who just assume Extraverts like to go to parties or do some dumb shit are retarded. Simply put, many introverts I know enjoy parties once their drunk way more than extraverts.

That being said, I'd like to think that I think alike to [MENTION=1425]Korg[/MENTION] in his post. Although, I can never really know what pill I've taken, because to simply assume we are different thinkers, is only a thought. I guess I need proof I'm a different thinker. Idk. I find it pretentious (not so much in Korgs post, but in general) for people to say "I"m different from the masses!" People, we are the masses. I don't really believe in esoteric philosophies of ubermensch and the like, where the few will trample the masses or some crap. I believe humanity is humanity, and while we can hope that we are different than everyone else, for all we know we all think the same thing, but we all show it differently. (Don't get me wrong, obviously there's people who never think for themselves, but I just don't think its as.... widespread in every aspect of people's lives.)

nighty night
 
I was lost and lonely before I found this place. I did have friends, but we all know how that is... they can't really understand you. I never told them anything remotely INFJ about myself, except for my ENFP friend.
Can't argue with that.

Sometimes, that curiosity about the grass being greener on the other side, it grows so strong that you have to venture to see if it really is or not.
For now, no.

Does anyone else get really, really pissed when people call you "weird?"
I used to think it was quaint to hear it. Half the time, it's people who like me who say it.
 
Initiating is hard because it's like, "well, what if she's doing something else? What if she actually doesn't want to spend time with me? I'll just be irritating her and making her feel obligated by asking..."

You feel this way because you're overwhelmed and need more recharge time. Once your sequential Ni function moves to the possibility of actually reaching out and your Ti has had time to rationalize the fear to a manageable level, you become ready to initiate again. We are more sensitive than ENFPs, because Fe is weaker than Ni, so we see more negative possibilities than they do. We may also see more positive possibilities. Thus, when we see hints of positive possibilities, we can magnify them exponentially.
 
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