Distinguishing INFJs from INFPs

[IndigoSensor]

Much of what is associated with Feeling is really Fe, and I think some INFx types are not INFPs stuck in Ne pondering, but INFJs who don't know what Fi really is.

This makes me wonder.

It could be possible that most people who think they are INFJ's are infact INFP's, and most people who think they are INFP's are really INFJ's.

 

[Raccoon Love]

I think overall INFP's tend to be less questioning and more satisfied about their particular type than INFJ's are. An INFJ will typically ponder about their type until they find the exact answer, somehow I feel INFJ's want to always self-discover and are typically restless and never satisfied on the other hand INFP's tend to accept their type about part of who they are and don't really fill the need to investigate on it further.

 

[Ria]

Thats it!!!

I've decided I'm going to just be an ENTP and just be done with it all lol

I feel I want to cry because I'm so frustrated by all the confusion with my type. Am I INFJ, or INFP? Am I ISFJ, or ISTJ?

So yea, I'm going to become a raging extrovert, and go show off somewhere tomorrow... I'd better make a list of who to visit, now where's my notepad???

 

[orangeappled]

This makes me wonder.

It could be possible that most people who think they are INFJ's are infact INFP's, and most people who think they are INFP's are really INFJ's.

I think people who spend time on MBTI message boards and read function definitions and have possibly perused a copy of Psychological Types may be typed correctly :tongue:. People who just take a silly quiz on the internet and read a poorly written profile may not be... IMO, MBTI tests often equate Feeling with traits associated with Fe, such as displaying warmth & concern with group harmony.

Most INFP profiles emphasize how we're often aloof at first & that our Feeling is hidden ("still waters run deep" bit); and they often mention how INFP values are removed from the external (less concern with group harmony than inner authenticity), but some people miss that....

In general, Feeling is mistakenly thought of as emotion, not the rational functions Fi & Fe. Anyone who looks into the matter beyond the surface usually catches on though.

I think overall INFP's tend to be less questioning and more satisfied about their particular type than INFJ's are. An INFJ will typically ponder about their type until they find the exact answer, somehow I feel INFJ's want to always self-discover and are typically restless and never satisfied on the other hand INFP's tend to accept their type about part of who they are and don't really fill the need to investigate on it further.

I've heard people say the exact opposite, but I agree with this to a point. I think INFPs like to exhaust all the possibilities (Ne in action) and then settle on what resonates as true (Fi slamming down the gavel).

I know my process was to take the test, disagree with the result (usually INTP), ponder other types, research functions, and see myself pretty clearly in Fi & Ne. After that, I was done questioning, although I do like to ponder things such as the above ("What if I'm really ISFP or INFJ or INTP, does that mean all ISFPs, INFJs, and INTPs are other types, because I've been gauging them in comparison to myself? Ugh - my brain hurts!".)

 

[Ria]

To be honest, I am now really confused. I have taken so many tests and I know I am extremely close with my J and P. I display traits of both, in different situations. It's funny, I was actually thinking about this today while I was driving. I was driving with the sun shining through my drivers side window, and with my sunglasses, it seemed to be casting a red glow everytime it flashed through between the trees and the buildings. It make me feel these cool sensations, and it almost put me into a meditative state. I took the situation, and tried to analyse it as to what function it fit under.

Also, while I was driving and experiencing this, I began many amazing dialogues in my head about pretty much everything under the sun. I believe one was a speech about some random and irrelivant subject, and some others were hypothetical conversations I could have with others who are close to me, and at times, got Ni radar flashes like I often do, coupled with hearing some song coming on the radio that had relivance to those people. So yea, my type has been in question again for me, and for some stupid reason, I feel like it's very important to have clarity on it but with the awareness that after some time, I get comfortable in a type, then it all shifts like an earthquake. During times like this, like right now, it all feels messy and unorganized and I feel crazy for caring about why it matters so much. I dunno, it just helps things inside me make sense and feel somewhat organized. I want to have clarity, yet feel completely satisfied. I hope all this makes sense, because it would really help if someone could tell me that they understand me.

 

[Questingpoet]

Yeah, I understand what you are saying Ria. I feel like you are along the same lines as me. I am an INFJ who spends a fair amount of time in stress mode as an INFP. My J and P are very close on every test I have taken. In the descriptions INFJ is the best fit, but INFP is not too far off. I actually got INTP on a test today! This is the first time I have gotten that result! I do have pretty well developed Ti. I tried to make myself an ST for years!!

One of the traits I've read about us INFJ's is that we constantly question things, like our type. The inner search is important to us. For what it's worth, I think you are similar to me--INFJ/INFP. As has been said many times here, one type does not necessarily define us completely. In different conditions we may morph into different modes. That is especially true for we older folks. I think we develop more traits, like our Se and Ti and Ne, to help us coup with all the situations that life throws at us. But for me INFJ is my base type. It's where I am when I am right with the world.

 

[mooseman]

According to one theory, we continue developing Fi and Ne as we mature, but not Te and Si so much. The Ti of an INFJ would still be way more developed than Te and Se would be more developed than Si.

This is one of the reasons I think my roots are probably INFJ, even though I also can relate very well to the general description of an INFP.

 

[Morgain]

Quote:
Originally Posted by Raccoon Love
I think overall INFP's tend to be less questioning and more satisfied about their particular type than INFJ's are. An INFJ will typically ponder about their type until they find the exact answer, somehow I feel INFJ's want to always self-discover and are typically restless and never satisfied on the other hand INFP's tend to accept their type about part of who they are and don't really fill the need to investigate on it further.

I've heard people say the exact opposite, but I agree with this to a point. I think INFPs like to exhaust all the possibilities (Ne in action) and then settle on what resonates as true (Fi slamming down the gavel).

I know my process was to take the test, disagree with the result (usually INTP), ponder other types, research functions, and see myself pretty clearly in Fi & Ne. After that, I was done questioning, although I do like to ponder things such as the above ("What if I'm really ISFP or INFJ or INTP, does that mean all ISFPs, INFJs, and INTPs are other types, because I've been gauging them in comparison to myself? Ugh - my brain hurts!".)

I keep on questioning my type to but there is a slide difference between INFJ and INFP in my opinion.

INFJ wants to nail down EXACTLY there type
INFP keeps on pondering about I could be INFJ, or I am an INTJ when I'm at work, or what does it mean to be an ISFJ ... It is the Ne looking for all possible possibilities in a never ending story. But the big difference is, for INFP all the possibilities are true in a way. They rather accept the collection of possibilities (or accept one but stille leave the rest open) than to keep on searching for THE EXACT ONE. I feel the best with INFP but other types can also fit from time to time. For me there is not one truth, that doesn't exist. and I hate it when people force me to take one truth, I feel so controled and bounded.
that is the difference between J and P

I think I'm an INFP in base mode and more an INFJ or INTJ in stress mode. I feel whenever I become more strict, more organized, les open for other peoples opinions, I should stop and cool down because I'm in a stress mode then

I think the difficulty with seeing the difference between INFJ and INFP can lie in the following. INFJ are J's but there P function is the dominant one (because of the I) while INFP's are P's but there J function is the dominant one. So I think that is the reason why most people who type INFJ or INFP have very close J and P results...

 

[orangeappled]

I keep on questioning my type to but there is a slide difference between INFJ and INFP in my opinion.

INFJ wants to nail down EXACTLY there type
INFP keeps on pondering about I could be INFJ, or I am an INTJ when I'm at work, or what does it mean to be an ISFJ ... It is the Ne looking for all possible possibilities in a never ending story. But the big difference is, for INFP all the possibilities are true in a way. They rather accept the collection of possibilities (or accept one but stille leave the rest open) than to keep on searching for THE EXACT ONE. I feel the best with INFP but other types can also fit from time to time. For me there is not one truth, that doesn't exist. and I hate it when people force me to take one truth, I feel so controled and bounded.
that is the difference between J and P

I think I'm an INFP in base mode and more an INFJ or INTJ in stress mode. I feel whenever I become more strict, more organized, les open for other peoples opinions, I should stop and cool down because I'm in a stress mode then

I think the difficulty with seeing the difference between INFJ and INFP can lie in the following. INFJ are J's but there P function is the dominant one (because of the I) while INFP's are P's but there J function is the dominant one. So I think that is the reason why most people who type INFJ or INFP have very close J and P results...

Well, I don't keep pondering seriously. Any thought to other types is just a fleeting amusement. I have a different view of INFPs...INFPs are often called "truth seekers". Finding an answer that resonates with Fi as TRUE is very important to me. It's all part of the harmonizing-clarifying process an INFP goes through internally to build a hierarchy of values. Contradicting pieces of info causes an internal conflict - I need to synthesize it into a whole belief I can accept. If I cannot do that, then the search continues. Ne certainly is happy with possibilities, but INFPs are Fi-dom after all, and don't like to accept anything less than a perfect fit, or it feels inauthentic and is rejected. This does not mean my idea of truth is a narrow one....I think many possibilities can all be accepted as long as they do not violate a base feeling-principle.

I think it's too cliche to use that criteria to determine type anyway - there are many reasons an individual may not settle on a type. That's why I think INFx types are as likely to be INFJ as INFP, and it's not just Ne going off on a possibility adventure.

J & P are not functions either, but determine which way your perceiving and judging functions are oriented: introverted or extroverted. This is why those who claim to be both INFP & INFJ disregard the whole foundation of the theory. INFP & INFJ functions are totally different. Even though every person uses all 8 functions to a degree, these are the ones each type prefers most.

INFP functions: Fi Ne Si Te
INFJ functions: Ni Fe Ti Se

As for stress mode, I certainly seem "J-ish" is some ways, but I think that's my Si & Te inferior functions coming into play....

According to one theory, we continue developing Fi and Ne as we mature, but not Te and Si so much. The Ti of an INFJ would still be way more developed than Te and Se would be more developed than Si.

This is one of the reasons I think my roots are probably INFJ, even though I also can relate very well to the general description of an INFP.

Are you referring to Lenore Thompson's book?

I admit it slightly annoys me when INFJs talk about having Fi (or INFPs talk about having Ni)....you can't be Ni Fe and have a strong Fi. Yeah, Fi is cool & all independent with its "fuck the man" mentality :tongue:, but you can't have have strength in both Fi & Ni. Lenore's theory discusses in what way each type uses all 8 functions, and use of Fi in an INFJ is very limited & strained. Fi is opposite of Fe in orientation, and will require a contrived effort for an INFJ to access, and it probably will feel "unnatural". I have a feeling that the Ni unusual perspective offsets Fe's adaptability to external values, which gives a mimicking of the Fi individualism. I don't expect Fe in an INFJ to show up like Fe in an ESFJ.

In my case, I have to make a conscious effort to use Fe, so it that "hogs the focus" when in use. Fe tends to be at odds with Fi, so it's like I have to suck it up and just do it and ignore Fi telling me it's all total BS. My use of Fe is conscious and strained, and makes me uncomfortable.

 

[Morgain]

I admit it slightly annoys me when INFJs talk about having Fi (or INFPs talk about having Ni)....you can't be Ni Fe and have a strong Fi. Yeah, Fi is cool & all independent with its "fuck the man" mentality :tongue:, but you can't have have strength in both Fi & Ni. Lenore's theory discusses in what way each type uses all 8 functions, and use of Fi in an INFJ is very limited & strained. Fi is opposite of Fe in orientation, and will require a contrived effort for an INFJ to access, and it probably will feel "unnatural". I have a feeling that the Ni unusual perspective offsets Fe's adaptability to external values, which gives a mimicking of the Fi individualism. I don't expect Fe in an INFJ to show up like Fe in an ESFJ.

In my case, I have to make a conscious effort to use Fe, so it that "hogs the focus" when in use. Fe tends to be at odds with Fi, so it's like I have to suck it up and just do it and ignore Fi telling me it's all total BS. My use of Fe is conscious and strained, and makes me uncomfortable.

If an INFP can't have a high Ni or Fe usage than my whole MBTI results is not correct? According to beebes theory it is possible for, for instance, an INFP to have a high Fe. In fact the more you use all your functions, the more developed you are. He says that if an INFP uses an Fe (s)he uses it in a rather negative way because it is a shadow function. And that is exactly how I use it. In the same way as you described it actually.

Well, I don't keep pondering seriously. Any thought to other types is just a fleeting amusement. I have a different view of INFPs...INFPs are often called "truth seekers". Finding an answer that resonates with Fi as TRUE is very important to me. It's all part of the harmonizing-clarifying process an INFP goes through internally to build a hierarchy of values. Contradicting pieces of info causes an internal conflict - I need to synthesize it into a whole belief I can accept. If I cannot do that, then the search continues. Ne certainly is happy with possibilities, but INFPs are Fi-dom after all, and don't like to accept anything less than a perfect fit, or it feels inauthentic and is rejected. This does not mean my idea of truth is a narrow one....I think many possibilities can all be accepted as long as they do not violate a base feeling-principle.

well maybe my vision on INFP is incorrect or I don't fit the bill as well as I thought. This is maybe why I don't fit in with the INFP forum. They all have there own inner truth and can be very defending when it is violated. While I do have an inner feeling of truth but it is like I can't nail it down. I can feel what it is, and I can feel it resonate when I read something that almost describe it. But there is no theory, no explanation where I can completely settle with. And I keep open for new ideas because maybe they can better describe my truth. I also keep open for ideas that are completely against it. I don't accept them but I try to look it from there point of view to try to understand it. But it is like you say, I need a perfect fit or it feels inauthentic and I think I haven't find the perfect fit yet, also not with MBTI...

 

[DimensionX]

If an INFP can't have a high Ni or Fe usage than my whole MBTI results is not correct? According to beebes theory it is possible for, for instance, an INFP to have a high Fe. In fact the more you use all your functions, the more developed you are. He says that if an INFP uses an Fe (s)he uses it in a rather negative way because it is a shadow function. And that is exactly how I use it. In the same way as you described it actually.



well maybe my vision on INFP is incorrect or I don't fit the bill as well as I thought. This is maybe why I don't fit in with the INFP forum. They all have there own inner truth and can be very defending when it is violated. While I do have an inner feeling of truth but it is like I can't nail it down. I can feel what it is, and I can feel it resonate when I read something that almost describe it. But there is no theory, no explanation where I can completely settle with. And I keep open for new ideas because maybe they can better describe my truth. I also keep open for ideas that are completely against it. I don't accept them but I try to look it from there point of view to try to understand it. But it is like you say, I need a perfect fit or it feels inauthentic and I think I haven't find the perfect fit yet, also not with MBTI...

Hi Morgain, I don't know if anyone has already said this yet but....it's like 13 pages and I'm tired lol.

One of the core differences between the INFJ type and the INFP type is when if asked how do you feel, an INFP will pretty much always automatically know, because they seem to take things from the outside world and think or feel, 'how does this sit with me', does this resonate with me, who I am, kinda thing, INFJ's on the other hand tend to be quite stumped by the question and have to trace back (unless they use a form of like place holder, something generic that will move the conversation on yet still be polite). How are you feeling now is kind of a question that INFJ's really try to explore, who they are, a search for self in a way I guess, INFP's tend to always know "who they are" they don't have to trace back through possibilities and implications to guess or find what they are feeling they just know in their heart/soul/core. One thing that is kind of amusing, if you say to an INFJ something that truly resonates with them they tend to like....smile or break into a grin and almost surprise themselves because they weren't necessarily aware that it was the case but the get that it is because of the emotional response so it has to be something that resonates with them....those kinda moments are very pleasant for them...or at least seems to be, but i suppose this last comment could apply to any type.

I think your starting to wonder if your more J because of what your work demands, interestingly a MBTI...er..person lol, did a presentation and then test to the board of directors where my stepdad works, pretty much all of them minus 2 I think tested as ESTJ's when about 3 of them clearly weren't it was just what they're work demanded from them, they learned to adapt to better fit the environment. I believe somewhere you've stated that the work you do is scientific in nature? if that is the case then it would make sense to say that you have adapted your contextual self and developed those processes that you call upon more for the work environment.

It's natural : ) so don't worry about it unless you feel it's going against who you are at the core then you may prefer to make some changes for example do more activities that are more like your type in your down time when your at home : )

I'm sorry if I haven't worded this very well, sleep seems to be one of those things I haven't been getting much of atm usually if I'm annoyed at myself about something it can kinda transfer across when I'm communicating in like short, sharp, sometimes piercing comments that can sometimes seem impersonal and if that is the case I apologise.

Others people may disagree with what I've said which is fair enough it was just something that I've noticed, feel free : )

 

[Morgain]

thanks lee for your reply, it makes a lot of sense!

I don't always know who I am but I always know what I feel. Not that I can explain it right away but it is always near my concious. And what I feel basicaly is what I am. Also what I believe in, my truth is based on feelings not on words. If someone would explain me a theory, first I would block it when it doesn't resonate with me but when I have some time to ponder, I would take the theory inside of me and see how I feel about it, how I can combine it or not combine it with what I already believe.

you are right, my J'ness comes from my parents first and then from the job I chose. Especially Te and Si and also Fe. I was very striked with how I thought people should be or interact with me, very perfectionistic, affraid to make faults and affraid of losing control. Then I tested INFJ. Now I have losen up and feel more relaxed and more as me and now I test INFP...

 

[arbygil]

I think the latest conversations here on Fe/Fi are *extremely* important. Oranges opened up a dialog that's been missing here for some time. I've said it before: Traits like being messy and/or disorganized are not indicators of being INFP any more than having psychic gifts are indicators of being INFJ. I do think quite a few people on the board are strong INFPs but due to the stigma many have placed on INFPs there aren't a lot who've wanted to try on those shoes.

If you're stuck between types, it's crucial to know Fi vs Fe. You can develop processes, sure, but you really can't be both...it's too much of a strain because they are polar opposites (you end up acting schizophrenic).

Think of it this way: Fe is very much the people pleaser. You're thinking about everyone else but yourself - and that's first in you. If you're Fi-first, you're thinking about how you feel personally about situations and how those situations affect you (and if they "feel" right or wrong to you).

I don't use Fe very well. If you ask me at any given time during the day how I feel, I really have to think about it - or I say "fine" so I don't have to think about it. It's worse when stress hits. And if I'm in a situation I've never encountered before, I really can't tell you how I feel because I have to analyze it first and feel it later (if I have the time).

Anyway- great convo! I'm eager to hear more.

 

[mooseman]

Are you referring to Lenore Thompson's book?

I admit it slightly annoys me when INFJs talk about having Fi (or INFPs talk about having Ni)....you can't be Ni Fe and have a strong Fi. Yeah, Fi is cool & all independent with its "fuck the man" mentality :tongue:, but you can't have have strength in both Fi & Ni. Lenore's theory discusses in what way each type uses all 8 functions, and use of Fi in an INFJ is very limited & strained. Fi is opposite of Fe in orientation, and will require a contrived effort for an INFJ to access, and it probably will feel "unnatural". I have a feeling that the Ni unusual perspective offsets Fe's adaptability to external values, which gives a mimicking of the Fi individualism. I don't expect Fe in an INFJ to show up like Fe in an ESFJ.

No. I was referring to things I have read here on the forums. I admit I still don't understand why Ni and Fi can't live together. But if that is true I guess I have misunderstood what Fi really is (or perhaps Ni.)

 

[Morgain]

I think the latest conversations here on Fe/Fi are *extremely* important. Oranges opened up a dialog that's been missing here for some time. I've said it before: Traits like being messy and/or disorganized are not indicators of being INFP any more than having psychic gifts are indicators of being INFJ. I do think quite a few people on the board are strong INFPs but due to the stigma many have placed on INFPs there aren't a lot who've wanted to try on those shoes.

If you're stuck between types, it's crucial to know Fi vs Fe. You can develop processes, sure, but you really can't be both...it's too much of a strain because they are polar opposites (you end up acting schizophrenic).

Think of it this way: Fe is very much the people pleaser. You're thinking about everyone else but yourself - and that's first in you. If you're Fi-first, you're thinking about how you feel personally about situations and how those situations affect you (and if they "feel" right or wrong to you).

I don't use Fe very well. If you ask me at any given time during the day how I feel, I really have to think about it - or I say "fine" so I don't have to think about it. It's worse when stress hits. And if I'm in a situation I've never encountered before, I really can't tell you how I feel because I have to analyze it first and feel it later (if I have the time).

Anyway- great convo! I'm eager to hear more.

good one aby!! I love the convo too!

Fe is indeed the people pleaser and feeling the other persons feelings before your own. I think about how i feel and how situations affect me first all the time! But somehow i have also learned that it is important to be a people pleaser. I can be gently with peopl in two different ways. When I'm very good in touch with my own feelings, with who i am then I'm gently with people out of love and peace and happyness, because i want them to feel good. But when I'm not in touch with my feelings I become a people pleaser and only please because I believe I have to to be a good friend/collegue/daughter or to be accepted but always with the goal to feel better myself. So it is in a selfish way. And I thought, I can be wrong though, that the first on is out of Fi and the second out of Fe but then in a negative way... What are your thoughts on that?

 

[Morgain]

this can be also interesting, an INFP view on the matter:

http://infpverse.freeforums.org/infj-vs-infp-attitudes-behavior-t570.html

 

[arbygil]

Morgain, I think you could be working out of your "demon" process for Fe, if you use Fe when you're under stress. Which I think a lot of us do. When I'm under stress, I might get very selfish and exhibit a negative form of Fi (which is my polar opposite). But I rarely exhibit a positive form of Fi, because it takes a lot of energy for me to be at that level.

Nothing should be "difficult" when it comes to exhibiting your traits. They're traits because it's who you are - if you have to struggle or push to act a certain way, then it's not really you. You might have to play a role to be something else (say, at work or school or home), but those roles are masks. If you have to force it, or if it feels uncomfortable, or if you have to make a conscious effort to do it, then it's not truly *you*. It's not automatic.

But that's a secondary problem with MBTI: If it's automatic, we're not always consciously thinking about it, and it can be difficult to pin down. Which, I think, can be the fault of an INFJ. We don't think about our emotional state. For me, MBTI tests are difficult because I have to think what everything means for me emotionally. And it can take me forever if the language used is trying to evoke a feeling from me.

 

[arbygil]

this can be also interesting, an INFP view on the matter:

http://infpverse.freeforums.org/infj-vs-infp-attitudes-behavior-t570.html

And that is a beautiful website. I think it's a good one to check out, too, if anyone has issues between INFP/INFJ. It's good to leave the "hive mind" for a while, to get a better idea of other types.

 

[Feelings]

I actually have a habit of asking ppl who I meet and am somewhat interested in what their MBTI is. I used to send the Internet test to a lot of people I worked with. As a result, I've gotten a fairly good "feel" of what the different types are actually like. Within each MBTI type there is a range of differences, so for example different INTJs will be different, but we share so many similar thought patterns.

I've only actually MET one INFJ. I worked with her, and she never took the test, but it was crystal CRRRYSSTAALLL clear that she was INFJ. Siighh.. I never paid much attention to her actually, and didn't give her much credit as being very interesting until something else happened. She was the conflict-avoidance type who might lash out at you unexpectedly when she finally gets angry enough. I liked her a lot. I think she's 30 now.

Met tons of INFP's. They're statistically MUCH more common. They always struck me as very easygoing. I usually have trouble telling INFPs and ENFJs apart because of that. INFPs are just really laidback. They seem like idea people too. Generally happy, I think. I like them, but find them boring. I often wish I was an INFP though.

INFJs are obviously very much in a class of their own. NOT easygoing, not really. Very very complex.... I don't really enjoy INFPs because whenever I reach for depth, they don't seem to take it seriously. That's why I have a strong preference towards INFJs. There's just so much more there....

Ria's an INFJ. Pretty much the epitome of what I've noticed to be the "quasi-psychic, connected to all living things, super empathic" INFJ sub-type. Arbygil too I think, although I haven't creeped her as much. The other distinct sub-type I've noticed is the INTJ-like type, that is very blunt and direct. Everyone else seems somewhere in between.

 

[Ria]

Thank you Pierce, I really appreciate your thoughts because it's true, I am quite spiritual and psychic, yet I'm not "flaky". I've always felt worried because anyone who's noticed this about me here on the forum, and who hasn't met me irl, wouldn't really get the opportunity to see how serious and grounded I really am. Yea, people who claim to be psychic etc, and who wander about with starry eyes and wishy-washy grins etc. pretty much drive me nuts

I have gone back to many of my posts, and yes, I notice that I have often made reference to my "feelings", but usually I have been using this place (well, particularly my blog), as a sort of therapy, to help me open up finally. And, as far as my writing and poetry goes, I do realize that this is a very INFP quality to be poetic, yet I also know that it has been my lifelong sharing of my thoughts as well as my feelings. I have noticed too, that my poems were all written reflectively, as is when I speak about what is going on in my life. Contrary to what some may believe here, (myself included until just now), is that I am only aware of my feelings, when in times of great strife. When the extreme stresses and problems that I had been dealing with for the last 2 years of my life were in their height, I was indeed, so stressed that I honeslty was for a while, in my shadow type. Now things are better, I am healthier, and my life has returned to a nice "calm". Now, I cannot tell you at any given moment how I am feeling.

I remember when in deeply painful times, when I was aware of my feelings, it was awesome to write about them. It felt so good to create an emotion "map" so to speak, for when I was all better. Oddly enough, I have looked upon my writing as "trophies" that I have made for myself, tributes for the hard times that I survived. I could have very easily turned to a bottle, but chose a healthier route. I go through so many dry spells when I cannot write, and those times are when I am feeling ok in life, and there are no reasons to "snap" within and hang out in shadow land...

At any given time though, healthy or unhealthy, my Ni, Ne and Fe are always very strong. I am currently exploring Si and Se now, and had wondered with Questingpoet last week, about the use of S. For a short time, I wondered if I was a sensor, because of what I "didn't" understand about it, and only went on somewhat of my own interperatation of "sensing". I know I must use Si, but to what degree, I am unsure. I would very much like to know exactly my use of Si. We kinda joked about it because our N is so strong. So yea, I want to badly understand my type, and get settled into it so I can be the healthiest I can be. Upon reflection, many INFJ's here, clain they had alright childhoods, with enough love to sustain them. I recall being raised with mountains of critisizm, no recognition and physical abuse which I'm sure, fed the "rebel" in me. As far as nature/nurture goes, I suppose that must have some effect. I see myself at times, (when I'm in the right natural setting), as Native person, who is intuned with the land around them. I have always felt such a strong pull to this way of being...So yea, I'm still struggling with sorting this all out. To have inner orderliness and structure, is so important to me, otherwise I'd fall appart, and that is one of my biggest fears.