[INFJ] Do you often feel inarticulate and dumb?

No.
 
Snowman219 said:
Was it a cowbell???
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Honestly dont remember. Two words on top of each other but both understood. Doesnt seem like that big of deal but to this day I talk about it because of how unique and strange it was
 
Originally Posted by Snowman219
Was it a cowbell???
Eventhorizon said:
Honestly dont remember. Two words on top of each other but both understood. Doesnt seem like that big of deal but to this day I talk about it because of how unique and strange it was
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images
 
I completely understand how you feel, it it sucks royally. I don't know if it is an INFJ thing, HSP, or just being human.

You have your B.A. in Philosophy with honors, and that is not a small achievement, so always know that. My mum used to always tell me "there will always be someone smarter, more knowledgeable, and more articulate than you, but in no way does it means that you are not. it only means that they had different experiences with different exposures" .. sounds great, but its not always that easy as that when you know you either are better somehow, or aspire to be better. And the worst thing you can do, is compare yourself to others -- I tend to do that and feel dumb if I take longer to figure something out, or get something done compared to a colleague.

As INFJs, I think we are slower to complete/finish something because we are perfectionists, not because we don't get it ^_^
 
I do feel inarticulate in some days but that's because I have to collect my thoughts or think of a better word to fit in the conversation then speak accordingly. At first, it did made me feel dumb because everyone was speaking so fast and I was not. Then I found out about Carl Jung's cognitive functions and it made me realize that it's just the way how I think. From your first post, it seems you can articulate well so no need to think you're dumb! :)
 
To the OP - YES I totally understand what you are talking about! I think it's a very typical way for an INFJ to feel.

I definitely over-think and analyze things way more than other people, which always ends up putting me on a different page from others. I also think about things abstractly and people are always like "do you have an specific example...?" and I'm like "...uh....asjdfls..s.."

I've been in situations SO often where there's a big topic being discussed, and I have all these ideas floating around in my head, trying to formulate themselves, but I have literally no idea how to actually contribute to the conversation. When I try to listen and play off what other people are saying, no one understands what I'm saying.

I think it all comes down to, again, N being so rare and S being so common. I've also been in so many situations where I was trying to explain something that I thought was complicated and brilliant, and nobody was understanding, and then somebody (most likely an S person) came along and said something incredibly simple and obvious, and everyone was like "oh yeah brilliant, that's exactly right!" and I'm like ".... I could have told you that... I just thought it was obvious..."

Also, when asked to describe what I'm feeling or thinking, (probably an INFJ's worst nightmare) I literally have no idea what to say. Whereas an S person would just throw out some concrete, obvious things that they were thinking or feeling, described in concrete, common language. For me...... what I'm thinking right now? That could fill many tomes and most likely, no one would understand... where could I possibly start?

I think being a rare personality type at times makes you seem more intelligent and at times, less intelligent. At times you start thinking something that nobody else is thinking, and you throw it out there, and (if you're articulate) everyone's like "oh my god so brilliant I never thought of that!" But at other times, thinking differently from others means that you're not on the same page, and if a teacher in a class (for example, since we've all been there) says something where he/she expects you to fill in a blank, (you know that kind of question? I hate them) you're like "uh... no idea what you're thinking... sorry.." while all the other students understand right away what the teacher is asking for.
 
jeromaye said:
Do other INFJ's feel the same as I do?
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You are not alone. In fact, I once seriously asked a friend if I was retarded....like, seriously. Of course, like any good friend, he said "Yes. You are.". I was doubting my intelligence and ability to express myself verbally so much that I was honestly beginning to believe I was mentally challenged. Scary, isn't it? I may not have a 130 IQ, but i'm pretty sure i'm not "retarded".

The best way to describe my way of processing new information is to compare it to P2P Torrent Software. I don't know if you've ever illegally downloaded anything ever(I sure haven't), but if not i'll explain how it works(saw it on Discovery Channel). When you download a movie, it doesn't download the file in an orderly fashion, meaning it doesn't download the movie from the first scene to the last scene in order. What it does is it downloads bits and pieces of every scene at once, eventually gathering all the bits and pieces resulting in a full movie.

That's sort of how my brain works. When I learn new topics, I don't really learn one thing, then move on to the next and so forth like normal people do. I learn a bit about this, then get side-tracked into this and that, then go back to this to learn more, then fall back into that and etc. So it takes me a bit longer to get equipped enough to discuss or debate something without sounding like an idiot, since most people know everything about chapters 1 through 3, and I only know bits and pieces of them, along with bits and pieces of every other chapter. It's scattered processing, but when it's processed, it's full. Anyways, that's the best way I can describe it for myself.
 
Not as much anymore. I did have that problem when I was younger...but INJs in general often struggle to reach that point where they can put their thoughts to words adequately. Even for more developed INJs, I think it's still often frustrating to read their own writing, because they have an uncanny sense of the idea in its pure, primitive form, and the transcription still seems to fall short.
 
Can so relate to all of what has been said in this thread.

When in a meeting at work, I may have ideas I want to share, but while I am processing how to put those thoughts into words the subject will change and it is then too late.

sprinkles said:
I know the feeling.
You should see me at Subway. Inside I'm just like "I don't knoooowwwww what I waaaaant! You have too many choices! It's so confusing! JUST GIVE ME SOME FOOD"
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Lol!
Subway, Panera, or any coffee shop. I stand there trying to take in the myriad of choices and feel rushed. When I feel rushed it's as if my mind shorts out.
I usually let my Wife order first to buy time, but she can make up her mind in an instant. Then eyes are on me.
Err, umm, let's see.
I too often just pick something to get it over with and am then disappointed in it.
My Wife has asked why I seem so flustered when I am ordering. She doesn't understand even when I explain what is going on in my head in such situations.
 
I'm pretty articulate, but I often feel dumb.

I don't currently have the ability to wield logic too skillfully, which would be enough of a problem in itself, but I have the even bigger problem of losing myself in the perceptions of others.

In other words, I would make a terrible lawyer, because I'm too able to see the validity in the arguments of other people, and to have outside thoughts pollute my own. It's a strange experience, being almost shapeless...I have trouble coming to definite conclusions because I see too many possibilities...and so on.

I'm holding a flickering flame against the inside of my jacket, tempest winds raging all around me, as it goes. Now that I remember, I've read this is a common Feeler problem in the early years -- resolved by focusing more on the T function.
 
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Its safe to assume the vast majority of people youre gonna run into in this world dont give a rats ass about what you have to say past your opening line. Its all in how you say it, body language etc.

Why you ask? Bc they dont want a conversation, they wanna know who daddy is. See growing up we at some point decide dads a genius, hes probably not, just more knowledgeable. Either way that relationship gets stuck in our brain and now we use it to relate to others. So now when we introduce ourselves what were really saying is 'Are you my father or am I? We cant both be him!'

Want other people to think your 'intelligent'? Convince them youre their dad, simple as that.
 
I never feel inarticulate. Dumb is a little more situational.

Sometimes people think I am dumb because I've made a joke or pun out of something in such a dry way that despite it being so over the top they think I'm serious. I thought pretending to think "monogamy" was the word "monotony" was hilarious but my partner didn't think so and carefully explained it to me. I tried to keep a straight face while being amused that they didn't get the joke but also thought it was both funny and sad that they thought so little of my intelligence. This kind of thing has happened frequently.

Other times people may think I lack intelligence because I don't like to respond on the fly to something I haven't fully processed. If pushed, I am more comfortable being "vaguely right" than I am risking being "precisely wrong." Some people demand precise answers immediately so when I either respond vaguely or put off responding at all, they think this means I'm either just not that bright or that I don't think it's important. On the contrary, I think it's important enough to not give a thoughtless response.

It's funny to me that the exact opposite of this also happens. Others often don't realize just how much time and effort I have put into analyzing something. When it comes up and I have an immediate confident response, they see this as me having not thought about it. If I appear confident about something, that confidence is usually justified. This isn't to say that I can't still make a mistake--only that the conclusion was not reached without forethought.

The times I do reach conclusion without forethought, I try to keep quiet while I'm figuring out how to back up my intuition with evidence and reasoning. Occasionally this may mean me saying something vague to stall for time to do this. It surfaces as, "Don't do this. I know this isn't the right answer," but then I'm trying not to let on that though I'm confident I don't yet have the ability to explain why it isn't. Many times I would have been better off just pretending that I had the evidence and reasoning but that's not something I'm comfortable with.

When I do have a response, I tend to be articulate. My words are carefully chosen. I sometimes speak with such precision that it often convinces people I am far more intelligent than I actually am. I like to say that this is an elaborate ruse. Carefully worded does not mean well thought nor correct--It ONLY means carefully worded. Sometimes I have to downplay this ability to prevent someone from over investing and often to keep others who may be considerably smarter than me from feeling dumb or that they should remain silent due to their perceived disparity.

Because of this, I was torn about whether to reply to this thread. I find boasting and bragging to be distasteful. In some environments, not touting my own abilities has caused people to underestimate me. I'm just not insecure enough to willfully make others feel bad. In this case, I saw enough, "Yeah, me too," that I thought the other side was not well represented. This was enough that I began to wonder if my own ability to be articulate was a counter indicator for being INFJ. I don't think that it is but if so, I would rather discover that now. Moreover, if there are others reading who felt this way, I would rather them also have a response to identify with.

I think this is all quite relative. If you post in a forum and have the wherewithal to pose such a question, you are certainly not inarticulate in general. Circumstantially when you haven't had time to find the right words, I can see how you may feel inarticulate in that moment. If that's the case then hopefully you can relate to some of the things I said above, too.
 
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Many, many times yes. This is due to either: fatigue, stress, occupied mind/distractions, lack of extroverted energy. The remedy for this is plenty of rest, a good filling meal and plenty of vitamins; focus.

Sometimes it's caused by social awkwardness and not knowing a proper response to a conversation, though that's rarer. The remedy for that is socialize more, and be creative with responses.
 
No.

But sometimes I wish other people would STFU for a second and stop being so eager to spew mindless shit out of their mouths. This is because I prefer to talk only when:

1) I have something to say
2) know how I want to say it
3) nobody else is talking

...when people blather on and on, it makes it hard for me to accomplish the above since I then have to wade pools of their verbal diarrhea and nonsense. But I never slap my forehead and say "jesus, I was so stupid and inarticulate right then...."
 
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