Enfp females: The Infj male destroyers?

Billy said:
Take a page from their book, its a much better way to be in the long run. 100% focus on 1 person becomes stuffy and suffocating eventually.
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Hi Billy. I see what you mean, and most of the time I have everything in common with the enfp as far as doing only what I want to do when I want to do it. Most of the time I turn people down to spend time with them because I am afraid they will want more from me in the future, which will either make me have to please them to keep the friendship or give up my freedom, and I choose freedom every time. The difference is with the enfps I dont feel I have a choice. I am compelled beyond control. The feeling I feel when around them is too strong to ignore. This is the picture I am trying to paint. When I am not with them it is no problem doing what you suggest, because I completely agree with you that it is a better way to live. In that sense I am happy that there is only one type that produces those strong feelings in me.
 
Choosing social activity is like a muscle, you have to work it out, and those feelings of being trapped by peoples desires will dissipate.
 
Infjman said:
I fell into the enfp trap once again and I am bummed. Any other Infj males ever meet a enfp, have a good time with them, and then get completely ignored like you dont exist? All the while you wonder how they couldn't see the potential there is for friendship/romance between you? And then you begin to question yourself because you cant help seeing the potential between you two, and then realize that the only reason you suffer is because you saw that potential, and it might not have existed? In a way I hope I am alone in this. If not, care to share your experiences?
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Yup, I've felt the same way. At first you guys are incredible together, but then you feel like there is nothing really to hold on to and make it 'stick'.
 
I started liking/talking to an ENFP at a time when she happened to have really low self-esteem, and we hit it off and I sort of boosted that for her, but then once that showed, other people (not just guys, but friends) noticed her more. Of course, it was in her nature to want to be accepted by the larger majority of people than one guy who liked her for herself, so she started adopting their mindset and values, and she would say she felt "pressured" by me (she knew i liked her). I assume this means she was torn between me and her friends and that she wanted to appeal to her friends, but didn't want to lose her connection to me as well, but idk. Then one day she randomly went off and in a split second her side of the story suddenly became that I was just taking advantage of her being nice to me and that we were never really "friends" but that I was creepy and stuff (by this point I didn't realize the factor of her friends and thought it was all my own fault).

Basically, if the ENFP already has a close connection to you, then it's totally worth it to fall for them in my opinion. But if not, then they probably will end up gravitating towards her own group or towards a bigger group.

The only confirmed ENFP's I've met are this girl and another girl who I talked to for only an hour on a Model UN trip, soooo don't take anything I just said as too expert of an opinion :p
 
[video=youtube;6BhF3BDmyLs]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6BhF3BDmyLs[/video]

I hate this THREAD!!!
 
Yes.
That is the difference between Ni and Ne. Looking for more possibilities within the same person or a few persons (and then eventually moving onto another small set of persons) vs possibilities within a more global set of persons.

The ENFP continued to see me as a possibility. . . perhaps out of many others. That person place considerable attention on me in a couple instances. At one point, I did make a mountain out of a molehill, but after a few weeks, I noticed simply that there are degrees of possibility within the romantic prospects in my life. The gist, of course, is that the amount of possibility between me and this ENFP can be considered minimal, despite their showing interest from time to time.
 
Blind Bandit said:
How is anyone surprised. You need only look at Pinkie Pie to see the crazy that is ENFP!

[youtube]j9zexEs-HIc[/youtube]
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Pinkie Pie is an ENFP?!?! Yay!! :)
 
niffer said:
Do you know why they feel liberating to be around? Because they are honest to themselves and others with what they want (among other reasons). I think that wanting to only be with them is really sweet, so if you haven't tried it before, reach out to them more and be the one to ask for one on one time if you think the two of you have had good times together. Don't be afraid to act how you feel around them, and sooner or later to just tell them. When you share with them what you want, you show that you can share their sense of freedom with them and can liberate them in return.

I cannot speak for all ENFPs or your situation without getting overly simplistic and making a lot of assumptions, but if I were you I wouldn't feel too down about it. If you guys aren't communicating far enough on the same wavelength (from an ENFP perspective) for you guys to have eventually come together naturally, then it means there would probably be obstacles in the dynamic of communication within the relationship from right off the bat anyway. It also goes without saying that it's hard to make relationships work out, even if the constant fascination between the two individuals is there. Especially with two NFs, things can get disastrous when issues come up unless both parties have high emotional stability and emotional fortitude needed to get through it.

I am happy to help, so let me know if this is looking relevant to your situation or not.
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You said it perfectly Niffer.

And being that I am an ENFP female, I'm not really sure how to take this thread...lol
 
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I have one ex-friend ENFP, one current friend ENFP, BIL is an ENFP and my youngest son is an ENFP. In the following respect they are all the same: they want to be part of the most exciting thing "at the moment." So when the fun is over, they are very quick to move on.
 
Infjman said:
Hi Billy. I see what you mean, and most of the time I have everything in common with the enfp as far as doing only what I want to do when I want to do it. Most of the time I turn people down to spend time with them because I am afraid they will want more from me in the future, which will either make me have to please them to keep the friendship or give up my freedom, and I choose freedom every time. The difference is with the enfps I dont feel I have a choice. I am compelled beyond control. The feeling I feel when around them is too strong to ignore. This is the picture I am trying to paint. When I am not with them it is no problem doing what you suggest, because I completely agree with you that it is a better way to live. In that sense I am happy that there is only one type that produces those strong feelings in me.
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ENFP's are INFJ's natural partners so this strong connection you are feeling is only natural. I'm an ENFP female and for the most part have intense connections with INFJ's. I think we bring out the best in one another!
 
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ENFP girls are nice, just try to find one thats not inmmature! thats hard because ENFPs are like big children xD
date an older ENFP.
 
Blind Bandit said:
How is anyone surprised. You need only look at Pinkie Pie to see the crazy that is ENFP!

[youtube]j9zexEs-HIc[/youtube]
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I'd have to say, this really makes me giggle :) My niece LOVES Pinky Pie (explains why she loves me so much :)) and I made this for her out of clay and put her name on the butt instead of Pinky's...
View attachment 16085View attachment 16086
 
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I'm not sure I've known any ENFPs, but how would you best describe their personality in action? They typically move around a lot from people to people? Sounds like a party host who talks to all the guests...
 
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The INFJ MALE DESTROYER as piloted by ENFP females.

Somehow, I think we'd end up getting off course and ending up on a Caribbean Island, partying somewhere, and you guys would just drive yourselves crazy reading into why we never showed up for your scheduled destruction.
 
For the record, I think that for certain ENFP females, depending on the INFJ, the same kind of relationship could develop: the kind where you're hopelessly attracted to the other person against all that is logical or sane.

Some INFJs are really emotionally needy, others are in their ESTP shadow phase, still others are older and as a result, highly balanced individuals. Which would you be attracted to?

Needy INFJs are off-putting, I should think. Thankfully, neediness is nothing more than an early phase of development, if you will it to be.
 
[MENTION=1360]TheDaringHatTrick[/MENTION]

Y u so clever?
 
Invisible Jim said:
Nothing delights an ENFP and keeps their attention more than opening one gift box only to find another gift box inside.
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SERIOUSLY.

I just got out of a relationship with an ENFP. They're actually great, I admire them becuse they are very honest with themselves, despite how crazy they appear to others (they're usually oblivious to it though). But ENFP's love high stakes, the rush, the thrill, the chase when it comes to romantic pursuits, unless you're able to maintain that fire they'll end up looking elsewhere.
 
Faltizan said:
SERIOUSLY.

I just got out of a relationship with an ENFP. They're actually great, I admire them becuse they are very honest with themselves, despite how crazy they appear to others (they're usually oblivious to it though). But ENFP's love high stakes, the rush, the thrill, the chase when it comes to romantic pursuits, unless you're able to maintain that fire they'll end up looking elsewhere.
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Something as simple as a great sense of humor would do it for me. Is that too much to ask? :)
 
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