Everything INFJ-y | INFJ Forum

Everything INFJ-y

Motor Jax

randomness included
Retired Staff
May 5, 2008
first off, a link for the INFJ type:

so, the basics:

"Portrait of the Counselor Idealist (INFJ).” The Counselor Idealists are abstract in thought and speech, cooperative in reaching their goals, and directive and introverted in their interpersonal roles. Counselors focus on human potentials, think in terms of ethical values, and come easily to decisions. The small number of this type (little more than 2 percent) is regrettable, since Counselors have an unusually strong desire to contribute to the welfare of others and genuinely enjoy helping their companions. Although Counselors tend to be private, sensitive people, and are not generally visible leaders, they nevertheless work quite intensely with those close to them, quietly exerting their influence behind the scenes with their families, friends, and colleagues. This type has great depth of personality; they are themselves complicated, and can understand and deal with complex issues and people. Counselors can be hard to get to know. They have an unusually rich inner life, but they are reserved and tend not to share their reactions except with those they trust. With their loved ones, certainly, Counselors are not reluctant to express their feelings, their face lighting up with the positive emotions, but darkening like a thunder head with the negative. Indeed, because of their strong ability to take into themselves the feelings of others, Counselors can be hurt rather easily by those around them, which, perhaps, is one reason why they tend to be private people, mutely withdrawing from human contact. At the same time, friends who have known a Counselor for years may find sides emerging which come as a surprise. Not that they are inconsistent; Counselors value their integrity a great deal, but they have intricately woven, mysterious personalities which sometimes puzzle even them. Counselors have strong empathic abilities and can become aware of another's emotions or intentions -- good or evil -- even before that person is conscious of them. This "mind-reading" can take the form of feeling the hidden distress or illnesses of others to an extent which is difficult for other types to comprehend. Even Counselors can seldom tell how they came to penetrate others' feelings so keenly. Furthermore, the Counselor is most likely of all the types to demonstrate an ability to understand psychic phenomena and to have visions of human events, past, present, or future. What is known as ESP may well be exceptional intuitive ability-in both its forms, projection and introjection. Such supernormal intuition is found frequently in the Counselor, and can extend to people, things, and often events, taking the form of visions, episodes of foreknowledge, premonitions, auditory and visual images of things to come, as well as uncanny communications with certain individuals at a distance. Introversion - Introverted people are the opposite of extroverted people. They focus most of their attention on themselves and their collective unconscious. This means that they usually keep to themselves and are quieter than extroverts are. Whereas extroverts enjoy parties and socializing, introverts value thinking, dreaming, and fantasies. If an introvert ever gets into a discussion about a topic that he or she has a particular interest in, then his or her internal machinations may be externalized. Such a discussion may be quite beneficial, functional, deep, involved, and/or emotional. The tendency amongst introverts is to have discussions of the most meaningful sort; otherwise, no discussion at all is preferred. From an introvert's point of view, most other discussions are simply chatter. Introvert Qualities: Like quiet for concentration. Tend to be careful with details. Dislike sweeping statements. Have trouble remembering names and faces. Tend not to mind working on one project for a long time uninterruptedly. Are interested in the idea behind their job. Dislike telephone intrusions and interruptions. Like to think a lot before they act, sometimes without acting. Work contentedly alone. Have some problems communicating. And probably: *Rehearse things before saying them and prefer that others would do the same; often responding with "I'll have to think about that" or "Let me tell you later." *Enjoy the peace and quiet of having time to self; find private time too easily invaded and tends to adapt by developing a high power of concentration that can shut out TV, noisy kids, or nearby conversations. *Are perceived as "a great listener" but feel that others take advantage of them. *Have been called "shy" from time to time; whether or not they agree, may come across to others as somewhat reserved and reflective. *Like to share special occasions with just one other person or perhaps a few close friends. *Wishing they could get ideas out more forcefully; resenting those who blurt out things they were just about to say. *Like stating thoughts or feelings without interruption; allow others to do the same in the hope that others will reciprocate when it comes time for them to speak. *Need time to "recharge" alone after spending time socializing with a group; the more intense the encounter, the greater the chance they'll feel drained afterwards. *Were told by their parents to "go outside and play with their friends"; when they were a child; their parents probably worried about them because they liked to be by themselves. *Believe that "talk is cheap"; get suspicious if people are too complimentary, or irritated if other people say something that's already been said by someone else. The phrase "reinventing the wheel" may occur to them as they hear others chattering away.

1. Respect their need for privacy.
2. Never embarrass them in public.
3. Let them observe first in new situations.
4. Give them time to think. Don't demand instant answers.
5. Don't interrupt them.
6. Give them advanced notice of expected changes in their lives.
7. Give them 15 minute warnings to finish whatever they are doing before calling them to dinner or moving on to the next activity.
8. Reprimand them privately.
9. Teach them new skills privately rather than in public.
10. Enable them to find one best friend who has similar interests and abilities: encourage this relationship even if the friend moves.
11. Do not push them to make lots of friends.
12. Respect their introversion. Don't try to remake them into extroverts.

**********The agreeable nature and quiet personality of INFJs make them particularly vulnerable to hurt feelings. Distress within close relationships can shatter the INFJ. Like all NFs under stress, INFJs feel fragmented and lost as if they are acting out a part rather than simply being themselves. This disassociation can be related to physical symptoms for the INFJ, whether real or imagined. Feeling split off from their physical natures, INFJs may become virtually immobilized by repressed feelings. Although INFJs may feel like remaining still and stationary until the chaos and confusion of a stressful situation dissipates, it would be best for them to actively sort out their needs from others. Being excessively cooperative and agreeable, the INFJ has a tendency to adopt values and beliefs of others as their own. When external conflicts grow, so does the INFJ's sense of personal disharmony. Disassociating themselves from others takes a great deal of effort for the INFJ. **Careers**: This lists represent careers and jobs people of your type tend to enjoy doing. The job requirements are similar to the personality tendencies of your personality type. Career Counselor, Psychologist, Educational Consultant, Special Education Teacher, Librarian, Artist, Playwright, Novelist/Poet, Editor/Art Director, Information-Graphics Designer, HRM Manager, Merchandise Planner, Environmental Lawyer, Marketer, Job Analyst, Mental Health Counselor, Dietitian/Nutritionist, Research, Educational Consultant, Architects, Interpreter/Translator

INFJ - The Mystic ----Profile by Sandra Krebs Hirsch and Jean Kummerow---- INFJs are future oriented, and direct their insight and inspiration toward the understanding of themselves and thereby human nature. Their work mirrors their integrity, and it needs to reflect their inner ideals. Solitude and an opportunity to concentrate thoroughly on what counts most is important to them. INFJs prefer to quietly exert their influence. They have deeply felt compassion, and they desire harmony with others. INFJs understand the complexities existing within people and among them. They are at their best concentrating on their ideas, ideals, and inspirations. --Living-- INFJ children have two sides. They can be very much involved in the world of people, as well as quiet, imaginative, and in their own world. They are usually gentle and abhor violence. As teenager, INFJs look for a small group of people who understand and appreciate them. Without this support, they can feel isolated from others. INFJs who do not find a supportive social group may find the teen years to be somewhat difficult for them because of peer pressure to be popular and activity oriented. They are not likely to enjoy large parties, but prefer intimate groups of close and long-standing friends. Many INFJs who have the opportunity to gravitate toward higher education where they often find their niche. With their intellectual bent, they are led to endeavors that allow them to deal with theory and complexity. Professors often spot their intellectual inclination and encourage it. INFJs often settle early into a career choice and diligently apply themselves to the career's requirements. This same diligent pattern applies when selecting other important things in their lives, such as where to live, who to marry, and what activities are worthy of their dedication. INFJs have an internal picture of how they would like their work to contribute to the general good. If they are in an appropriate career area, INFJs may reap the rewards of their insight and hard work. Because of their future-focus, their people orientation, and their push toward task completion, they may rise to positions of responsibility. --Learning-- INFJs have a strong love of learning, and they tend to do well academically. Through persistence, diligence, and conscientiousness, they complete their assignments on time. They are likely to enjoy research and will go great lengths to find answers. INFJs enjoy investigating the possibilities and meanings beyond the actual facts and realities. Reading holds a particular fascination for them because it allows them to have quiet reflection time and engages their imagination. They also like the written word (and rely on it more than the spoken word) since it is usually better structured and more coherent with a ready-made framework. INFJs write and communicate well because they want to formulate their ideas clearly. They place high regard on their reader and audience. They seek to communicate their ideals to others. When their ideals need to be championed, they speak up in an enthusiastic and impassioned way. As students, INFJs prefer learning from teachers whom they both like and admire, and who give them personal attention. INFJs are often 'model' students. They are quiet and orderly, reflective and thoughtful, and sincerely want to please their teachers and learn the right thing. They learn best from others but want time to assimilate material by themselves. INFJs will go beyond what has been presented and often mull material over in their minds. Occasionally they will discuss ruminations with others in order to learn even more. They particularly like the more conceptual and theoretical classes, therefore, higher education is comfortable to them. --Working-- INFJs tend to be devoted to what they believe in and seek work where their needs, values, and ideals can be deeply engaged. They move on the wave of their inspirations and are determined to see that their values are worked out in their lives. They will work toward their goals individually and, when needed, will put together a team of other highly dedicated people like themselves. They are personal be with others, working with integrity and consistency, and they follow through on their commitments. INFJs, while concentrating on what is important to them, may ignore the political ramifications of their actions. They can be surprised by the necessity of being political and usually resent that aspect of organizational life. Being able to talk honestly and comfortably to people at work is much more important to them than 'playing games.' INFJs orient themselves toward their goals using a personal, values-based framework. They do not 'advertise' their values and priorities because they believe in harmony and positive relationships. However, one would do well not to underestimate the amount of perseverance, energy, and time INFJs give to their priorities. What they do, they do with an almost religious intensity. The INFJ external environment may be only partially organized. Their internal environment, by contrast, is anything but haphazard. Their ideas need to fit into a coherent whole that has the pieces in place. Organization of the internal world takes precedence over organization of an external world. INFJs prefer occupations that focus on the big picture, involve conceptual awareness, and lead to a better understanding of the spiritual, emotional, or future needs of people. They want their work to have impact and meaning and for it to bring them admiration and respect. While INFJs can and do enter all occupations, some are more appealing to them than others. These include Clergy, Education Consultant, English Teacher, Fine Arts Teacher, Librarian, Psychiatrist, Psychologist, Scientist, Social Worker, and other occupations that allow INFJs an opportunity to make their own creative contribution. --Leading-- INFJs lead through their quiet yet persistent and determined effort toward long-range goals for themselves, others and their organizations. In working toward their vision, they win cooperation rather than demand it. INFJs work to make their insights real and are able to inspire others with their ideals. They use a low-key, soft, yet intense and determined course of action. When they do not directly lead others, they may still act as facilitators between people. In meetings, they focus on both people and new ideas. --Leisure-- Leisure-time pursuits for INFJs are often solitary or involve the company of others who are particularly important to them. Sitting around with dear friends discussing feelings can be very special to INFJs. INFJs are likely to have friends of long standing rather than make many new acquaintances. They may meet with their friends fairly consistently to share what is happening in their lives. It is sometimes difficult for others to break into this circle. These deep friendships are important, even though INFJs may not share much directly about themselves. --Loving-- For INFJs, 'still waters run deep.' They tend to become attracted to someone special and prefer this one deep relationship over many superficial ones. The depth of involvement and feeling that the INFJ has toward loved ones is only partially communicated outward. At times, when alone, INFJs become truly in touch with the depth of the love they have for their partner. They may not openly demonstrate or even verbalize their intense feelings. INFJs often have an ideal standard of what love is. They hold to their ideal and are disappointed when, inevitably, their relationship and/or mate reveal flaws. INFJs enjoy sharing activities like a regular 'date,' revisiting the place where they first met their mates, or doing other symbolic things that help to continue and confirm the existence of the bond that they feel for their partner. INFJs want to give love and to be loved. They enter into relationships just to be cared for, even when the person is not right for them and they suspect it. However, when they meet that special person, they are quick to get into the relationship and make it a serious one. They will end their other relationships in order to pursue their loved one. They become very focused, intense, and direct in that pursuit. INFJs, when scorned, take it personally and retreat inward. They may obsess about the relationship and their role in its failure. One INFJ explained, 'people can do the most outrageous things, yet I blame myself for triggering their behavior or not recognizing it. I see myself as responsible for relationships. Other people can dismiss them --- I'm not able to.' INFJs may blame themselves and experience a period of mourning. If they do not marshal their resources, externalized their feelings, and take risks to move on, they may experience a long period of self-examination.

The Profile by David Keirsey---- INFJs focus on possibilities, think in terms of values and come easily to decisions. The small number of this type (1 percent) is regrettable, since INFJs have unusually strong drive to contribute to the welfare of others and genuinely enjoy helping their fellow men. This type has great depth of personality; they are themselves complicated, and can understand and deal with complex issues and people. It is an INFJ who is likely to have visions of human events past, present, or future. If a person demonstrates an ability to understand psychic phenomena better than most others, this person is apt to be an INFJ. Characteristically, INFJs have strong empathic abilities and can be aware of another's emotions or intents even before that person is conscious of these. This can take the form of feeling the distress of illnesses of others to an extent which is difficult for other types. INFJs can intuit good and evil in others, although they seldom can tell how they came to know. Subsequent events tend to bear them out, however. INFJs are usually good students, achievers who exhibit an unostentatious creativity. They take their work seriously and enjoy academic activity. They can exhibit qualities of over-perfectionism and put more into a task than perhaps is justified by the nature of the task. They generally will not be visible leaders, but will quietly exert influence behind the scenes. INFJs are hard to get to know. They have an unusually rich inner life, but they are reserved and tend not to share their reactions except with those they trust. Because of their vulnerability through a strong facility to introject, INFJs can be hurt rather easily by others, which, perhaps, is at least one reason they tend to be private people. People who have known an INFJ for years may find sides emerging which come as a surprise. Not that INFJs are inconsistent; they are very consistent and value integrity. But they have convoluted, complex personalities which sometimes puzzle even them. INFJs like to please others and tend to contribute their own best efforts in all situations. They prefer and enjoy agreeing with others, and find conflict disagreeable and destructive. What is known as ESP is likely found in an INFJ more than in any other types, although other types are capable of such phenomena. INFJs have vivid imaginations exercised both as memory and intuition, and this can amount to genius, resulting at times in an INFJ's being seen as mystical. This unfettered imagination often will enable this person to compose complex and often aesthetic works of art such as music, mathematical systems, poems, plays, and novels. In a sense, the INFJ is the most poetic of all the types. Just as the ENTJ cannot lead, so must an INFJ intuit; this capability extends to people, things, and often events, taking the form of visions, episodes of foreknowledge, premonitions, auditory and visual images of things to come. INFJs can have uncanny communications with certain individuals at a distance. --Career-- INFJs often select liberal arts as a college major and opt for occupations which involve interacting with people, but on a one-to-one basis. For example, the general practitioner in medicine might be an INFJ, or the psychiatrist or psychologist. As with all NF's, the ministry holds attraction, although the INFJ must develop an extroverted role here which requires a great deal of energy. INFJs may be attracted to writing as a profession, and often they use language which contains an unusual degree of imagery. They are masters of the metaphor, and both their verbal and written communications tend to be elegant and complex. Their great talent for language usually is directed toward people, describing people and writing to communicate with people in a personalized way. INFJs who write comment often that they write with a particular person in mind; writing to a faceless, abstract audience leaves them uninspired. INFJs make outstanding individual therapists who have the ability to get in touch with the archetypes of their patients in a way some other types do not. The INFJs are also the most vulnerable of all the types to the eruption of their own archetypal material. As therapists, INFJs may choose counseling, clinical psychology, or psychiatry, or may choose to teach in these fields. Writing about these professions often intrigues an INFJ. Whatever their choice, they generally are successful in these fields because their great personal warmth, their enthusiasm, their insight, their depth of concentrations, their originality, and their organizational skills can all be brought into play. At work as well as socially, INFJs are highly sensitive in their handling of others and tend to work well in an organizational structure. They have a capacity for working at jobs which require solitude and concentration, but also do well when in contact with people, providing the human interaction is not superficial. INFJs enjoy problem-solving and can understand and use human systems creatively and humanistically. As employees or employers, INFJs are concerned with people's feelings and are able to provide in themselves a barometer of the feelings of individuals and groups within the organizations. INFJs listen well and are willing and able to consult and cooperate with others. Once a decision is made, they work to implement it. INFJs are generally good at public relations and they have good interpersonal relations. They value staff harmony and want an organization to run smoothly and pleasantly, themselves making every effort to contribute to that end. They are crushed by too much criticism and can have their feelings hurt rather easily. They respond to praise and use approval as a means of motivating others, just as they, the INFJs, are motivated by approval. If they are subject to a hostile, unfriendly working condition or to constant criticism, they tend to lose confidence, become unhappy and immobilized, and finally become physically ill. --Home-- As mates, INFJs are usually devoted to their spouses, but may not always be open to physical approaches. They tend to be physically demonstrative at times, but wish to choose when, which is when they are in the mood. This maybe quite confusing to an extroverted mate. Often an INFJ's expressions of affection will be subtle, taking a humorous, unexpected turn. INFJs need and want harmony in their homes and find constant conflict, overt or covert, extremely destructive to their psyches. Their friendship circle is likely to be small, deep, and longstanding. As parents, INFJs usually are fiercely devoted. A female INFJ, particularly, is linked to her children in a way different from the other types: with almost psychic symbiosis. This deep bond can create an over-dependency that can be unhealthy for both mother and child. At the same time, INFJs tend to be good friends with their children, while firm in discipline. They usually are concerned about the comfort of a home and most especially the comfort, physical health, and emotional well-being of both mates and children. --Midlife-- At midlife an INFJ can best continue developing the thinking function in the form of logic and the pursuit of theory. The pleasure of taking a theoretical model and applying it to a situation may be a source of interest which an INFJ may have been neglecting. While continuing to pursue the person-to-person in feeling-type relationships, at midlife INFJs may want to get more involved in working with NT's, who offer a dimension not dominant in NF's and vice versa. Carefully providing for rest and taking care of physical health is vital to the INFJ at all times, and mandatory from midlife on. --Mates-- The oracular INFJ may opt for the inventive ENTP, but also may go for a different kind of contrary, namely the ESTP. The ESTP and ENTP, to the casual observer, look pretty much alike. Charming, suave, urbane, humorous, witty, fantastically easy to approach, venturesome, even reckless. But one is out to invent, the other to promote; this is no small difference. It takes an inventor to make a mousetrap, but it takes a promoter to make an enterprise. To succeed, the promoter has to be, in the best sense of the word, a con artist. He must be able to get people's confidence. Now why would a meaning-giver INFJ be intrigued by an entrepreneur ESTP? Because he wants to help the entrepreneur find his soul and his significance in the scheme of things. Similarly, why is the INFJ attracted to ENTP? Because he wishes to rescue this iconoclast from his seeming folly (and let's face it, most inventions are abortive, or still-born).

@@ MSU First Year Experience Program @@ INFJ - Introverted Intuition with Feeling -- People with INFJ preferences are great innovators in the field of ideas. They trust their intuitive insights into the true relationships and meanings of things, regardless of established authority or popularly accepted beliefs. Problems only stimulate them--the impossible takes a little longer, but not much. They are independent and individualistic, being governed by inspirations that come through intuition. These Inspirations deem so valid and important that they sometimes have trouble understanding why everyone does not accept them. Their inner independence is often not conspicuous because INFJs value harmony and fellowship; they work to persuade others to approve of and cooperate with their purposes. They can be great leaders when they devote themselves to carrying out a sound inspiration, attracting followers by their enthusiasm and faith. They lead by winning (rather than demanding) acceptance of their ideas. They are most content in work that satisfies both their intuition and their feeling. The possibilities that interest them most concern people. Teaching particularly appeals to them, whether in higher education or through the arts or the ministry. Their intuition provides insight into the deeper meanings of the subject and they take great satisfaction to aiding the development of individual students. When their interests lie in technical fields, INFJs may be outstanding in science, or research and development. Intuition suggests new approaches to problems and feeling generates enthusiasm that sparks their energies. Intuition powered by feeling may be of immense value in any field if not smothered in a routine job. Some problems may result from the INFJ's single-minded devotion to inspirations. They may see the goal so clearly that they fail to look for other things that might conflict with the goal. It is also important that their feeling is developed, since this will supply necessary judgment. If their judgment is undeveloped is undeveloped, they will be unable to evaluate their own inner vision and will not listen to feedback from others. Instead of shaping their inspirations into effective action, they may merely try to regulate everything (small matters as well as great ones) according to their own ideas, so that little is accomplished.

INFJ --An Inspiration to Others-- INFJs are gentle, compassionate, and accepting, yet given to streaks of extreme stubbornness. The INFJ's driving force is their Intuition (N), which is directed inward (I), generating a never-ending stream of possibilities and ideas. In fact, the more the INFJ introverts, the more malleable and open-ended life can seem. But the external world has a way of interfering with this flow of inspirations and creativity because INFJs feel called upon to render service to humanity (F) in a very orderly and demanding way (J). Consequently, when INFJs are committed to an ideal or cause, the stubbornness surfaces. These otherwise compliant, reserved individuals become extremely rigid and demanding of themselves and others, when pursuing a goal in the external world. INFJs are dreamers whose genius, caring, and concern can be an inspiration to many other people. Their quietness gives them a low profile and their concern has a way of being intense in most situations in which they find themselves. In almost any interpersonal activity, from a board meeting to an intimate family gathering, the INFJ's quiet strength is felt by others. Their hope, aspiration, and caring have limits, however, and those limits can be invoked by the INFJ at any given moment. Such limits may have no apparent relationship to external events, and may leave others feeling frustrated, confused, possibly even deprived. INFJs often need an Extroverted type to tap the reservoir of their inner richness. Otherwise it can be lost, either in the INFJ's introversion or as a consequence of pressure from the typically scheduled life of those who prefer the Judging function in their outer worlds. When in the presence of more Extroverted types, they are likely to share jokes, ideas, whimsical thought, and many inventive models or theories. Those close to the INFJ may feel frustrated that so much of what is inside the INFJ is so rarely fully tapped. The frustration continues as those close to INFJs recognize that while they must respect INFJs' space, doing so diminishes INFJs' contributions to the world. INFJs often have, without formal training, skills in group dynamics. Almost psychically, they are aware of various levels of interaction between and among people. However, such awareness remains largely their own, and efforts to make these observations known to others can be frustrating to INFJs. Though they may maneuver themselves to receive affection, INFJs may be quite sparing in dispensing it to others because of their naturally Introverted manner. For the INFJ, talk is cheap, and the resulting sparsity of their communications can have a negative effect on relationships at work and home. Gender differences can be seen with the INFJ. The female INFJ clearly has the advantage. As a Feeling type, she has the nurturing qualities traditionally associated with femininity. Often, however, because of her Introversion, the INFJ female does not project those qualities, even though they are very much a part of her nature. At home as well as at work she tends to be aloof, so that the sense of her caring and concern is ultimately lost, particularly to those types more demanding of overt affirmations. A common complaint about the INFJ female is that she is "nice but seems removed." People feel this about her even though they would admit that in fact she's always there when needed, quietly dependable, steady. Female INFJs must work hard to be understood and may find themselves being taken for granted because of their own failure to make their needs known. Consequently, when they do express their needs, it seems out of character and can lead to general disbelief, which, of course, is frustrating to the female INFJ. Male INFJs have a more problematic situation because the qualities naturally preferred by INFJs are not those traditionally considered to be "male." To counter the image of being weak, male INFJs can become stubborn, often to a degree disproportionate to the situation at hand. They are capable of taking a seemingly small issue and making it seems as if the entire world--or at least their masculinity--were riding on the outcome. The behavior unfortunately belies the fact that both male and female INFJs are reservoirs of quiet, intellectual introspective imagination who can inspire insight and growth in men and women alike. INFJs are often great thinkers whose pondering of the immense can bring great ideas to the forefront. Typically, they seek to spread their ideas in a quiet, deliberate way--more typically by the pen than by the sword. At home, INFJs are given the ultimate arena in which to act on both their idealism and their humanitarian concerns. Their longing for harmony is such a driving force that they sometimes create tension in their relationships by working so determinedly to eliminate it. They would do better to work out tensions within themselves than to focus on external conflicts, because they often carry very heavy inner burdens. In some ways, this fosters a sense of martyrdom typical of Feelers in general. Over the long term, the inner tension that plagues them as a consequence of imperfectly realized aspiration toward total harmony can do little except induce guilt in INFJs and others. The INFJ goal of harmony is particularly difficult to achieve because the model for it is rarely articulated, though the drive toward it is nonetheless unrelenting. Parenting to an INFJ means accepting intense responsibility to help young minds and spirits develop on their own. By example and by direct involvement, the INFJ exerts great energy to see that all children are afforded every intellectual opportunity available. There is considerable allowance for differences--as long as each individual exerts himself or herself. The INFJ parent strives to be stimulating, resourceful, and helpful in everything. A young spirit is considered a terrible thing to waste. Toward that end, if a child shows interest in any kind of self-development, no matter how different from the preferred activities of the INFJ parent, that interest would still be encouraged. To the best of their abilities, the INFJ parent will provide whatever is necessary to foster growth. The home and living style of the INFJ seem relatively neat to outsiders, but just below the surface lie a million articles and projects to be addressed at a later date. It is more important for the home atmosphere to be congenial, stimulating, and accepting than for it to be precisely neat and tidy. The home is a reference library for a wide variety of interests and pursuits. Most everything has some symbolism or meaning and rarely is anything discarded. The fantasy is that some day, the INFJ will wander through the Pandora's box of goodies and attend to each of the many projects contained within. Usually that remains only a fantasy for the INFJ. As children, INFJs are frequently very complacent. Except for the stubbornness exhibited around values they prize, their love of harmony, coupled with a general curiosity and hunger for knowledge, makes them compliant children and excellent students. If anything, parents, especially Extroverted ones, may be amazed at how content the INFJ seems, though somewhat concerned about their daydreaming. But the dreaming typically gives way to good scholarship and the INFJ child finds school, at most levels, quite rewarding. Clearly, their Introverted-Intuition prefers theoretical and abstract course work, but their desire to please teachers and parents makes them successful and productive in most subjects. Learning enriches the mind and the INFJ learns very early on that his or her mind is the gateway to the world. Family events are opportunities for INFJs to explore and learn, so they are attended with eagerness and satisfaction. INFJs are especially sensitive to family tension and have a tendency to personalize those tensions, even blaming themselves for problems they did not create. If family events are sources of tension, INFJs will tend to shun them, even be terrified by them. If, on the other hand, they are filled with warmth and joy, INFJs can become quite involved, though often in a more passive than active way. Wherever the INFJ is, there is work, particularly if the work offers some opportunity to grow and learn. As managers, INFJs are fairly open and very interested in both the people and the product. Though usually slow to give positive strokes, they are nonetheless inwardly proud of their subordinates' accomplishments and open to their desire for self-improvement. The biggest bane of the INFJ's work is conflict and tense interpersonal relationships. In general, INFJs are adept at helping others actualize their goals and eager--as both workers and managers--to actualize their own. They are at their best in situations that encourage personal enhancement. INFJs can benefit from their mature years if more leisure time and less compulsiveness give them the freedom they need for dreams and inspirations. To daydream, fantasize, theorize, read, build something, or simply "follow a star" allow the INFJ to bring forth all sorts of inner creations. Later years can also be pleasant for INFJs who allow themselves to drop the world's many troubles, problems, and issues from their shoulders. Though this is very hard for them to do, a few succeed completely, it can be sweet relief for a type that, by virtue of their unique combination of preferences, tends to allow many of the world's cares to be heaped upon them. Famous likely INFJs include: Thomas Jefferson (whose creativity, genius, and idealism helped to forge the Republic, even though his own aristocratic value system was different from that of the Constitution he helped to author); Jimmy Carter (whose Introversion kept him from being understood, and whose Intuitive-Feeling preference enabled him to be a powerful mediator in bringing Menachem Begin and Anwar Sadat to an accord); and Sigmund Freud (whose Intuitive psychological theories revolutionized the world, and whose strong Feeling preference kept him working to help people his entire life, although others' criticism of his work made him ever more rigidly entrenched in his own beliefs).

Summary - INFJ —Contributions to the Organization-- -Provide future-oriented insights directed at how to serve human needs -Follow through on commitments -Work with integrity and consistency -Prefer jobs which require solitude and concentration -Organize complex interactions between people and tasks --Leadership Style-- -Lead through their vision of what is best for others and the organization -Win cooperation rather than demanding it -Utilize a quiet yet persistent course of action -Work to make their inspirations real -Inspire others with their ideals --Preferred Work Environment-- -Contains people strongly focused on ideals that make a difference to human well-being -Provides opportunities for creativity -Harmonious -Quiet -Has a personal feel to it -Allows time and space for reflection -Organized --Potential Pitfalls-- -May find their ideas overlooked and underestimated -May not be forthright with criticism -May be reluctant to intrude upon others and thus keep too much to themselves -May operate with single-minded concentration, thereby ignored other tasks that need to be done --Suggestions for Development-- -May need to develop political savvy and assertiveness skills to champion their ideals -May need to learn to give constructive feedback to others on a timely basis -May need to check their vision with others -May need to relax and be more open to what can be accomplished in the present situation -Order of Mental Preferences: Intuition, Feeling, Thinking, and Sensing

"Abstract thoughts. Loves reality and abstract. Intelligent and clever. Changing personality. Attractive. Temperamental. Quiet, shy and humble. Honest and loyal. Determined to reach goals. Loves freedom. Rebellious when restricted. Loves aggressiveness. Too sensitive and easily hurt. Gets angry really easily but does not show it. Dislikes unnecessary things. Loves making friends but rarely shows it. Daring and stubborn. Ambitious. Realizing dreams and hopes. Sharp. Loves entertainment and leisure. Romantic on the inside not outside. Superstitious and ludicrous. Spendthrift. Tries to learn to show emotions."

Interesting, very interesting. I personally think, that INFJs are special group of people. But I am very curious in which houses in Harry Potter world would be INFJs sorted. Hufflepuff? Or Ravenclaw? What do you think?
  • Like
Reactions: Jexocuha
I don't believe your INFJ.

Your name is subject to... suspicion.
Im a total INFJ and I hate it. I've taken the test 34832489 times sense I was 16 (now 24) and its always been the same. Im constantly hurt, confused at peoples mean-ness and often feel like SHUTTING DOWN. Im glad to find this forum though, I need a few people who are on my wave length to reaffirm that I am not insane.
[ I need a few people who are on my wave length to reaffirm that I am not insane.[/quote]
Our journey in this world is not an easy one....at times in my past I despaired at the way I was....."Why am I the only one who thinks like this?" was my perennial cry. We are here and we understand and we are not afraid...neither should you..embrace your uniqueness and talents..you are a special gift to the world..:thumb:
  • Like
Reactions: Jexocuha and Ant
I've been pretty lucky in life to find people who "get" me, but it's not always easy. I recently graduated from law school (I know...not the best profession for an INFJ) and found there was a marked contrast between those professors that took the time to understand my ideas and those that dismissed them right away. The latter were extremely frustrating because I often at first didn't realize that my idea was particularly radical - it just made sense to me. But those professors that were willing to step back and say "I never thought of it like that" really made me feel great. For the rest, I just learned to keep my mouth shut.
  • Like
Reactions: Jexocuha
16types.info INFJ Description


Socionic Perspective: The Humanist


gentle but have firm principles; demonstrate positive attitude; willingness to share your world

Model A Analysis: intellectual (Fi), creative (Ne), shyness (Se), role (Ti), estimative (Si), suggestive (Fe), personal knowledge (Te), concrete art (Ni)

(Zero Angel Note: the above describes what roles each process fulfill for the INFJ)

Socionics Description - From http://www.socioniko.net/

©I.Weisband, Working Materials, 1986.
©Translated by Dmitri Lytov, edited by Lev Kamensky, 2002.

  1. Bearer of quiet introspection, hidden sea of feelings. The world of his feelings is so fine and rich that he does not need verbal reassurances of someone’s love for him. Even without words he observes, who loves whom and how, who needs or doesn’t need whom. His most important capability is his ability to adapt to his partner’s emotions, to empathize, release emotional tension, to calm down.
  2. He is usually a quiet, amicable man. Being in groups, he prefers to keep silence and watch, but among his close friends his behavior switches to the opposite – then one cannot call him too shy, because he remarks perfectly, how other people treat him, and knows how to improve their relation to him. Strives to submit other people to his own understanding of ethical and non-ethical. He never imposes his own emotions on others, but accompanies, empathizes emotions of his partner. He demonstrates specific emotional standstill. He is sure that other people need him to be quiet, calm, tranquil. He strives to be something like a "compress" other people can apply to their wounds.
  3. Cannot refuse if asked to do something. This is why people often exploit him. He needs such a partner, submitting to whom, he can shield himself from excessive chores. In relations with people his interests are narrowed to a certain group, but in the objective world he is interested by absolutely everything: his intellect and skills are really omnivorous. He is scarcely capable of evaluating the quality of his work and time spent to accomplish it. Often he cannot distinguish between a triviality and what is really important. He knows what he can do but does not know what he needs to do. He cannot stay aside when other people are working, and keeps on working when other people already finished. He dislikes very much being ordered to do something new while some other things have not been yet done.
  4. Critical towards his own beauty (handsomeness), will, energy. He feels much pain when criticized for these aspects. Compliments on these aspects are not accepted as ambiguous only when they are expressed face-to-face, in a mild tone, without emphasis. He needs silent or not emphasized recognition. He cannot afford being untidy.
  5. Deed is the best care. His partner can provide pleasant emotions he needs from time to time through intelligence, logic, demands, and ability to protect. One needs to show up for the rendezvous on time, fulfill promises, be polite, thoughtful, and there is no need in more proofs of love or further conversations. If the smartest interlocutor explains his opinion in the form of speculations, instead of short and resolute formulations, then Dostoyevsky feels permanently dissatisfied and unhappy of being together with him. And his main requirement to his partner is: faithfulness. He does not forgive infidelity.

Intertype Relation Chart

INFJ Identical
ISTP Activity
ENFP Mirror
ISFP Beneficiary
ENTP Supervisee
INTJ Look-a-like
ESFJ Illusionary
INTP Benefactor
ESFP Supervisor
ISFJ Comparative
ENTJ Semi-Dual
ISTJ Super-Ego
ENFJ Contrary
INFP Quasi-Identical
ESTP Conflicting

INFJ Computer Function Analysis

Oldham Style: Sensitive

Basic Pleasure: Acceptance
Basic Fear: Rejection

Oldham's Type Description

  1. Familiarity. Individuals with the Sensitive personality style prefer the known to the unknown. They are comfortable with, even inspired by, habit, repetition, and routine.
  2. Concern. Sensitive individuals care deeply about what other people think of them.
  3. Circumspection. They behave with deliberate discretion in their dealings with others. They do not make hasty judgments or jump in before they know what is appropriate.
  4. Polite reserve. Socially they take care to maintain a courteous, self-restrained demeanor.
  5. Role. They function best in scripted settings, vocationally and socially: when they know precisely what is expected of them, how they are supposed to relate to others, and what they are expected to say.
  6. Privacy. Sensitive men and women are not quick to share their innermost thoughts and feelings with others, even those they know well.
Source:Oldham, John M. and Lois B. Morris. The New Personality Self-Portrait Rev. ed. New York: Bantam, 1995.

  • acceptance
  • being close to others
  • living up to one's intellectual and vocational potential
  • a sense of mastery from accomplishment
  • introspection
  • sensitivity
  • hyperawareness of feelings
  • low expectations
  • remaining on the fringes of groups
  • rejection
  • being hurt
  • being unsuccessful
  • getting involved
  • being socially inept
  • being incompetent in academic and work situations
  • being criticized
  • being demeaned
  • being found uninteresting
  • being worthless
  • being unlovable
  • unpleasant feelings
  • doing new things
  • unpleasant situations
  • unpleasant thoughts
  • being evaluated
  • being discovered to be a "fraud"
  • being put down
  • attracting attention
  • new responsibilities at work
  • seeking advancement
  • failure
  • reprisals
Disorder Perspective

The personality disorder which is a pathological representation of the Sensitive personality type is the Avoidant Personality Disorder.

Basic belief: I may get hurt. Thinking strategy Avoidance

The Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders, Fourth Edition (American Psychiatric Association, 1994, pp. 664-665) describes Avoidant Personality Disorder as a pervasive pattern of social inhibition, feelings of inadequacy, and hypersensitivity to negative evaluation, beginning by early adulthood and present in a variety of contexts, as indicated by four (or more) of the following:

  • avoids occupational activities that involve significant interpersonal contact, because of fears of criticism, disapproval, or rejection;
  • is unwilling to get involved with people unless certain of being liked;
  • shows restraint within intimate relationships because of the fear of being shamed or ridiculed;
  • is preoccupied with being criticized or rejected in social situations;
  • is inhibited in new interpersonal situations because of feelings of inadequacy;
  • views self as socially inept, personally unappealing, or inferior to others;
  • is unusually reluctant to take personal risks or to engage in any new activities because they may prove embarrassing.
Typical Beliefs

  • I am socially inept and socially undesirable in work or social situations.
  • Other people are potentially critical, indifferent, demeaning, or rejecting.
  • I cannot tolerate unpleasant feelings.
  • If people get close to me, they will discover the "real" me and reject me.
  • Being exposed as inferior or inadequate will be intolerable.
  • I should avoid unpleasant situations at all costs.
  • If I feel or think something unpleasant, I should try to wipe it out or distract myself—for example, think of something else, have a drink, take a drug, or watch television.
  • I should avoid situations in which I attract attention, or I should be as inconspicuous as possible.
  • Unpleasant feelings will escalate and get out of control.
  • If others criticize me, they must be right.
  • It is better not to do anything than to try something that might fail.
  • If I don't think about a problem, I don't have to do anything about it.
  • Any signs of tension in a relationship indicate the relationship has gone bad; therefore, I should cut it off.
  • If I ignore a problem, it will go away.
Last edited:
I'm only posting this here because 16types.info seems to not be working properly. I've had to pull this info off of the Google cache. Keep in mind that everything under Disorder Perspective simply describes the Avoidant Personality Disorder , which INFJs are more prone to than any other type.

What are your thoughts on this profile?
Last edited:
  • Like
Reactions: 5ufvdee369jcdd
*Merged with everything INFJ-y*

It's handy and I don't want to lose it to the bottom of the page.
I've been pretty lucky in life to find people who "get" me, but it's not always easy. I recently graduated from law school (I know...not the best profession for an INFJ) and found there was a marked contrast between those professors that took the time to understand my ideas and those that dismissed them right away. The latter were extremely frustrating because I often at first didn't realize that my idea was particularly radical - it just made sense to me. But those professors that were willing to step back and say "I never thought of it like that" really made me feel great. For the rest, I just learned to keep my mouth shut.

I think law can be a perfect profession for the INFJ -- you get to read a lot, develop your own ideas, and be an advocate for a cause if you want. :)
  • Like
Reactions: 5ufvdee369jcdd
Law seems so cut-throat and populated by TJ types. I'm not even sure I would want to spend the entire day with a bunch of TJ's. Some of them aren't bad individually, but i'm not sure i'd like to spend the day with a large group of them. I'd go insane. :m053:
this site has some really great points and information on INFJs :m1:


Cheers for that. I found the brief CareerStrength test here http://www.notjustapaycheck.com/careerstrength.html ,surprisingly hard to answer (It took me forever) but also very enlightening and relevant to me. I got this as the end result ~~~

The temperament pattern you rated highest:

Theorist: Want knowledge and to be competent, to achieve. Seek to understand how the world and things in it work. Are theory oriented. See everything as conditional and relative. Are oriented to the infinite. Trust logic and reason. Want to have a rationale for everything. Are skeptical. Think in terms of differences, delineating categories, definitions, structures, and functions. Hunger for precision, especially in thought and language. Are skilled at long-range planning, inventing, designing, and defining. Generally are calm. Foster individualism. Frequently gravitate toward technology and the sciences. Well suited for engineering and devising strategy, whether in the social or physical sciences

The temperament pattern you rated second:

Stabilizer: Want to fit in, to have membership. Hunger for responsibility, accountability, and predictability. Tend to be generous, to serve and to do their duty. Establish and maintain institutions and standard operating procedures. Tend to protect and preserve, to stand guard and warn. Look to the past and tradition. Foster enculturation with ceremonies and rules. Trust contracts and authority. Want security and stability. Think in terms of what is conventional, comparisons, associations, and discrete elements. Generally are serious and concerned, fatalistic. Are skilled at ensuring that things, information, and people are in the right place, in the right amounts, in the right quality, at the right time. Frequently gravitate toward business and commerce.


Motorjax - Thats very comprehensive information, and I identify strongly with all of it, maybe to around about 75% anyway. Although from time to time, on other MBTI tests I still seem to oscillate between INFP, INFJ and INTJ! Ps- Next time, please use more paragraph spacing. lol
"He advances yet does not seek fame"
I would say he helps from the background with no problems of others getting the credit. He gets frustrated when others do not act out what he seems to know needs to be done. He always has others in mind when making suggestions.
"Retreats but does not avoid blame"
Readily takes it on the chin for others. Even offers it. The word "retreat" often comes from a need for rebuilding one's inner self as it wears on him quite heavily when trying to help make things better or even best.
"He seeks only to preserve the people" says it verbatim
"And his advantage accords with that of the ruler"
Sometimes the wrong ruler enacts his best wishes as the ruler cannot finish what is necessary, though "a" ruler, indeed.
"He is the treasure of the state"
Depends on the hearts of the state. They listen when they can most of the time.
That is excellent. Thanks for sharing.
  • Like
Reactions: 5ufvdee369jcdd
There are so few INFJ's

Tell me about feeling like the odd one out.
I think that I have only ever met two other INFJ's in person - so it's difficult to speak with someone on the same wavelength. INTJ's are pretty easy to speak with, but in my experience they always end up trying to run your life.
Well, I've known I'm INFJ for quite a few years now. I want to say I took the test the first time when I was around 18 or 19 and am now 26, and it's resulted in INFJ every time except once, when it resulted in INTJ. However this is the first time I've ever actually pursued any real knowledge of the subject (which I guess, inevitably is me) and I'm a bit overwhelmed. It seems like everyone on this site so far has a vast awareness not only of their own MBTI type but of others as well, and to be honest I can barely understand my own.

I'm feeling a little behind.
Well, I've known I'm INFJ for quite a few years now. I want to say I took the test the first time when I was around 18 or 19 and am now 26, and it's resulted in INFJ every time except once, when it resulted in INTJ. However this is the first time I've ever actually pursued any real knowledge of the subject (which I guess, inevitably is me) and I'm a bit overwhelmed. It seems like everyone on this site so far has a vast awareness not only of their own MBTI type but of others as well, and to be honest I can barely understand my own.

I'm feeling a little behind.

You should not feel behind. MBTI isn't magic key for understanding people and world, but it's very useful and it's never late for useful things. I'm 30, I know for this only few months, but it helps me. One is never old for good things.

Tell me about feeling like the odd one out.
I think that I have only ever met two other INFJ's in person - so it's difficult to speak with someone on the same wavelength. INTJ's are pretty easy to speak with, but in my experience they always end up trying to run your life.

I think I am starting to love an INTJ.
Would that be so bad?
Interesting side note. ('cuse the thought got into my mind and I HAD to figure it out)

There are aprox. 6,786,401,135 in the world right now.
with only 1% being INFJ, that leaves 67,894,011.35 people that are INFJ
The total surface of land on the planet is 148,940,000 km
Last edited: