But the moment you make it about yourself, it fails and you are left wanting and unfulfilled.
I do understand this, though maybe I am being misunderstood.
I feed the birds and squirrels, as time permits. I watch them come and go, bathe in the water and flutter it all over themselves, I am giving them my love. It is so wonderful. About two or three months back, maybe longer, a cardinal flew in and took a high perch on a piece of driftwood turned up like a tree. She looked around a bit and left without eating. The squirrels were eating here and there, so I saw no danger. She did so again. A few moments later, she came back with her young cardinals. She flew them to the ground and tried to teach them to fend for themselves. The birdfeeders never happened that day. I felt this as a special moment. I was sitting on the porch, but she knew I was safe and shared her little ones with me from the cover of the woods. I was excited about this so much. It was something additional to me.
I like to be given back to. It makes me feel all was not in vain. It fulfills my needs. It is like giving to a child until one day the child gives to me. I love to see a young one offer me their pop-cycle. It is fulfilling; not getting a pop-cycle, but seeing that child offer it to me.
Walking up behind your wife twenty times for a small hug from behind is wonderful. Having her walk up to me and hug me from behind once in twenty or more times, I get that extra feeling of love I need. Not all relationships are 100% reciprocal. There are mental issues, health problems, family issues, and the list can go on and on.