How often should you say "i love you"?

[Wyst]

I've never told any one (because family and close friends) that I love them (her). I'm guessing I'll frequently say it on the phone or at goodbyes. But I surmise I will also say it randomly just because.

 

[Roger]

We should say "I love you" time by time, otherwise it will become formality.

Or we should say i love you when we are feel its great peak.

 

[Gaze]

I've noticed that people tend to say "I love you" a lot during the early stages of a relationship. Depending on the couple, I almost believe they are trying to convince themselves that they're right for each other. I don't think that is necessarily a bad thing. When you first start dating you have to try things in order to push the relationship further. Seeing how those words feel in your mouth is one of the ways people do that.

I don't need to hear "I love you" very often. I need a lot of personal space to recharge after interacting with people. If someone is continuously pestering me, even if it is to tell me they love me, I can get extremely withdrawn or irritable. So, in actuality, if someone tells me they love me too much I end up liking them less.

It's important to not get stuck in rituals as your relationship grows. I'm talking about the set times people say "I love you." It's good to have them but I think it's important to not have those be the only times you say it. Bring the person flowers as a surprise on a Wednesday with a love note attached.


/end ramble

Strongly agree.

 

[TinyBubbles]

as often as they need to hear it.

 

[TinyBubbles]

I like hearing it and saying.

I live lovingly anyway in thought, word and deed. It's something i believe to be important in my close family relationships.

I tell my children and my boyfriend that I love them, every day.

I'm just a sappy Italian mamma though

wow, i actually never tell anyone i love them. i said you should say it as often as they need to hear it, but i should elaborate: i meant you should make it obvious, through actions or words or a combination of both, and not necessarily those three words... personally i get uncomfortable when i'm forced to verbalize it! it's kinda.. too much, you know? makes me uneasy.
i don't specifically like hearing it either, not because it's not a nice thing to hear, but because there's a very strong expectation to reciprocate, and im not sure i should do that.

 

[VivaCohen]

I always say it when I'm ending phone conversations, saying bye, or saying goodnight to someone I love. That's just how I was raised. As far as telling someone I love them or them telling me in a romantic relationship, as in, reminding each other how much we love each other randomly... I wouldn't say that I need to hear it all the time, but I need to know it. And depending on what's going on in our lives and our relationship, how much I know it changes. So sometimes I need to hear it more, and other times I know how they feel without them having to tell me. I never want to hear it if they're only telling me because they think I want to hear it. I only want to hear it when its sincere. I've found that the more secure the relationship is, the less I need to hear it, because the more I already know it. I've never been one to tell the person I love them 24/7 . At some point its going to sound more like a meaningless habit they've picked up.

 

[alcyone]

Talk is cheap.

+1

I don't need to hear it. I need to see it. I need to see some reflection in the actions of my SO that shows love and consideration. And that doesn't mean doing things that he would want done for him. It means knowing and then doing the things that I'll truly appreciate for me. It is a tall order, but over time if you haven't learned what the other person likes, how they want to be treated, and the things that make them happy and are important to them; the question has to be asked, 'What have you been paying attention to for all this time?'

There are countless abusers out there who often and repeatedly tell the people they hurt they 'Love them'. If life were really fair, we would be born with choke valves in our throats so that any time we attempted to tell a falsehood like that it would choke the words out before they left our lips.

 

[Faye]

You should say it as often as it takes to make the other person feel loved.