[INFJ] How was you as a child?

Sunnyshine

Sunnyshine

Newbie
MBTI
INFJ
Hello :)

I have wanted to post this topic for a while. As an INFJ I wonder how you were as a child (if you're an INFJ)?

When I found out that I'm an INFJ I have thought a lot about this, and also talked to my parents on how they experienced me as a child. I just found out that my mom is an INFJ, and I think that's why we have a very good relationship (a special relationship), a lot of the same interests and can talk about everything (feelings, feelings and feelings :laughing:)

As a child a had a lot of friends, I were really bossy when playing with other kids:sweatsmile:, I was not afraid to say what I meant (!!), but I cared a lot for my younger siblings and cousins (they are much younger than me).
I was also very very very sensitive and could be upset for a lot of things - this I remember well, how sad I could be for something that could have happend. I also was very creative, I wrote a lot of "books"and had big dreams!!

As a teenager I still had a lot of friends and was outside with friends all the time. Very careful when I meet new people, but I got to now new people very fast. I had a lot of thoughts, dreams and feelings.

When meeting family one time as a teenager (all adults) and they (we) had a conversation I remember so well that it was difficult for me to have something to say in the conversations, and I also remember I said to myself: "when I get older, it will be much better! And I will have a lot to say in conversations". As an adult it haven't been much better - I find a lot of topics very uninteresting, and some people have boring conversations that I'm not that engage in. I have meet a few people that is a really good match for me, and we have A LOT to talk about (I wonder what MBTI types they are...)

As an adult I still care a lot about other people and I want them to have a good life, but I'm very afraid to say what I mean (especially at work) and I'm very careful before I say anything (I like to think before I talk), I'm not bossy anymore (I think, but I have strong opinions that I'm not afraid to share to my friends/family). I still have a lot of friends, but I don't have so many "best friends" anymore which I miss to have. I have been thinking a lot about why so many friends is not in my life anymore, and when I found out that I'm an INFJ it all made sense.

I remember I said to my mom when I was like 18-19 years old, that I get exhausted to have so many friends because everyone needs care (of course) and got mad when I haven't contacted them for a while. I had a lot of friends, everyone wanted contact from me almoste everyday (!!), but that was just a mismatch with my preferred alone time. It all made sense when I found out my personality type. The friends I have today, have also told me that they don't need contact everyday, but we are still good friends whenever we talk or meet (what a good feeling, because they feel the same way as me).

That's my story from my short life (I'm 24 years old). It would be very interesting if someone else want to share how you was as a child and as an adult? :smiley::smiley:
 
I was very sensitive. My parents have said they rarely spanked my brother and I because it would have been useless. They could have spanked my brother for an hour and he would have just looked at them calmly and said, "are you done?" They said with me they only needed to look at me funny and I would burst into tears.

I grew up on a farm and my memories are largely of being alone in nature.

I do have a memory of my brother and I doing a chicken dance to a 45 record of chickens clucking "in the mood." Still makes me smile. So my appreciation of quirk started young.

My mom had a plaque on the wall with this saying:

"I know you think you understand what you thought I said but I'm not sure you realize that what you heard is not what I meant"

She said it was because that's what having conversations with me was like. I think she found me a little frustrating and enjoyed me. She was infp.

I was socially awkward and picked on. My mom was not the kind of mom that made sure her kids were clean and well-dressed. I was called "Raggedy Ann" by my classmates in elementary school, but I was so disengaged I didn't know it until they told me about it as an adult.

I was a major clutz. Boys would walk next to me in the halls, mock tripping over their feet and mockingly tell me "don't trip."

I was befriended by a popular girl in high school who saw potential in me. I became popular as her sidekick. Then a few years later, I had enough of her mean girl shit and separated. I settled in with two very different best friends. One was an evangelical Christian who had a rough home life like me (just a stepdad instead of stepmom). She wanted to save me and invited me to bible studies at her church. I went and was open, but she knew I didn't believe. I did like the warmth of the community. My other best friend was the child of a hippie mother who loved Bon Jovi and Metallica and Stephen King. She was smart and thought critically about things in a way that was unusual in our small school. After a break-up with a boyfriend she wished, out of anger, that he would die in a fiery car crash. Then he did. My Christian friend was convinced my other friend had cursed him. Aside from the obvious pain that a life was gone, I found the conflict between the way these two people experienced the world, and my ability to like and connect with both of them, kind of humorous.

I became Snow Princess (second tier to homecoming queen), mostly because I was nice to people, and people actually like you when you're nice. Not that I thought that then. I was just nice because I genuinely like people and see interesting and likable qualities in most people.

Interesting memory lane. I could keep going, but out of kindness, I'll stop. :-)

I will leave you with this bit of quirk from my childhood, though:

 
My childhood?

Books. Horror, science fiction and fantasy books. Reading and writing.
Anthony Horowitz, R. L. Stine, Roald Dahl, Jules Verne, etc.

It was actually Jules Verne's Twenty Thousand Leagues Under the Sea that got me into reading, and I was instantly addicted. I learned to read and write on my own. Most of my free evenings were spent writing stories.

Theatre and musicals. Played in some amateur productions when I was 5 till 12ish, most notably Cats.

Music. Singing, dancing, children's disco's, 90's dance. I loved the positive message the 90's embodied.

Swimming. Got all diploma's under the sea, including diving, and did some regionals.

Chess. Learned to play at 5.

Computers. First the Commodore 64, and then we got our own x86 pc (486) when I was 4. Learned to 'code' when I was 8, took my first pc apart when I was 10.
Videogames.

Radio and video. My uncle is an engineer and a radio (ham) amateur, and my dad was into video recording, so I tinkered around with their stuff and made my own radio show with two of my friends called JoBiSi and we also shot a short movie.

Documentaries on Discovery channel & National Geographic. I was an information junkie, so I put my face in front of the TV whenever I wasn't at school. Way more interesting than that lowlevel shit we had to learn at school. I had obsessions with biology, genetics, thunderstorms, tornadoes, nature shows, physics, technology, history, crime and psychology.
 
I was really really outgoing at school early on but to the point of exhausting myself with it. It didn't come natural. I remember being really young and asking my mom if it was ok to not want to play with others all the time.. to want to play alone. Thankfully she understood I was introverted and validated me. Then, around middle school I must have gave up trying to be so social because I remember being silent and kind of broody, then. Apparently I suddenly had a lot to think about at that age! I also remember in a creative writing class in high school, our teacher had us write our name down on a piece of paper and we passed the paper around and everyone wrote down their impression of you. The one that stood out most to me was someone wrote: "Spunky in a quiet way." And I thought, "Yes! This person gets me."

I was also very imaginative. I feel like I spent 95% of my time day dreaming and playing make believe or creative writing or role playing in some form. I was also weirdly obsessed with anything Baroque as a kid.
 
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As a small child very precocious, happy to play on my own but had a few close friends. By high school I was withdrawn, still a few friends but suffering at the hands of my stepfather abuse didn't help me. I have never really been a one to go to bars and clubs, I hate large crowds and loud venues. Made it very hard to meet anyone for love. I've only had 5 relationships including one marriage and divorce.
 
Lady Jolanda said:
My childhood?

Books. Horror, science fiction and fantasy books. Reading and writing.
Anthony Horowitz, R. L. Stine, Roald Dahl, Jules Verne, etc.

It was actually Jules Verne's Twenty Thousand Leagues Under the Sea that got me into reading, and I was instantly addicted. I learned to read and write on my own. Most of my free evenings were spent writing stories.

Theatre and musicals. Played in some amateur productions when I was 5 till 12ish, most notably Cats.

Music. Singing, dancing, children's disco's, 90's dance. I loved the positive message the 90's embodied.

Swimming. Got all diploma's under the sea, including diving, and did some regionals.

Chess. Learned to play at 5.

Computers. First the Commodore 64, and then we got our own x86 pc (486) when I was 4. Learned to 'code' when I was 8, took my first pc apart when I was 10.
Videogames.

Radio and video. My uncle is an engineer and a radio (ham) amateur, and my dad was into video recording, so I tinkered around with their stuff and made my own radio show with two of my friends called JoBiSi and we also shot a short movie.

Documentaries on Discovery channel & National Geographic. I was an information junkie, so I put my face in front of the TV whenever I wasn't at school. Way more interesting than that lowlevel shit we had to learn at school. I had obsessions with biology, genetics, thunderstorms, tornadoes, nature shows, physics, technology, history, crime and psychology.
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I know you know this,
but you're so cool and smart. :relaxed:
 
Hmmm, lemme think. I was pretty quiet, imaginative, and super curious.
I read a lot.. the library became my refuge.
I played in the woods a lot, did lots of creative stuffs like drawing and painting, rode my bike much further than my mother ever knew.
I always befriended the bullied kids and outcasts.
Overall I was just a nice little kid.
 
I basically sat around giving people life advice while playing video games from the age of about 8 onward. Before that I played with play-doh and captured bugs.
 
Asa said:
I was going to say the same about @Wyote!

It's fun to learn how you all were as kids.
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Not to toot my own horn, but I was one of those babies that came into the world with their eyes open and smiling.
Haven't stopped since, basically :grimacing:
 
Surprised everyone here had a nice childhood.

I remember my first day of pre-school I did not want leave my babysitter (who sent me to school) so one of the teachers thought it would be a good idea to tie me up against a pole in the school courtyard, in the shade. I was horribly embarrassed and imagine how I felt when everyone else went out of the class during lunch and made a crowd around me. Kept to myself since. I'd watch all the kids playing in the playground hoping I could play and make friends like them but did not know how. Never had a friend until I think one day a nun (I was at a catholic school) talked to me during breaktime and tried to introduce me to new friends.

My mom and dad were workaholics. I had a stay at home nanny so she was the person I spent most of my time with.

Parents were very dismissive especially when I try to display my emotions. They didn't know how to handle me and preferred my younger brother over me. Basically the golden child whos grown up to be the person they had wished him to be.

Anyways...
 
petir said:
Surprised everyone here had a nice childhood.
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Not at all. I have terrible parents who physically and emotionally abused me. I was bullied daily from age 4 till 15. The question asks about you though, not about them. :)

When you weren't under those people's negative influences, who were you? What were your hobbies? Your favorite cartoon? Did you play sports? Baked cookies? :)
 
I was a little shit. :tearsofjoy::tearsofjoy:

My dad would tell me the good ol’ story how I would be constantly running throughout the whole store and parking lot full speed when I was 3 and he would have such a hard time catching up to me. :tearsofjoy::tearsofjoy:

Loved playing in the dirt and used to play a bit aggressively despite being considerably smaller than my peers.
 
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