I prefer INTPs for fun and games. Their Ne is hilarious, and they can be pretty witty too.
I prefer INTJs for discussing serious topics. I can usually skip the small talk with them and go directly into the rabbit hole. I really appreciate that.
Edit: I would like to clarify that my interactions with INTPs have been quite brief and shallow. I'm pretty sure that they also have a serious side, but I haven't been honored with seeing that side of them.
I'm pretty sure that they also have a serious side
I'd say we are mostly serious side, that's just not the side we always like to show the world.
Yeah, I figured. I guess they must only like sharing that Ti with people they feel comfortable with.
I remember I once tried to get this intp to talk about his thoughts on certain things( I forgot what we were discussing) and he was getting progressively more and more defensive using humor as a shield. I, on the other hand, was pushing him more and more to become more serious but at the end it just became clear that he wasn't comfortable with me sharing that information. So I learned my lesson not to push an intp to talk about anything serious until they were ready lol
Yeah, the frameworks we use to derive our logical reasoning are usually very well-defined and thoroughly researched, but they don't always consist of information that's easy to relate. I often find that when I'm trying to explain my reasoning about things, I leave out details or rely on shortcuts that are known to me but that aren't apparent to others, resulting in confusion. Inferior Fe doesn't help in this regard as it can lead to frustration that others sometimes don't "get" what to me is self-evident. INTJs probably have an easier time explaining themselves because they rely on external facts and frameworks (Te) which are more easily referenced. That doesn't necessarily make their conclusions more accurate, but it does make them more "provable" and credible in many cases.
Ti-doms really don't like to be pushed for opinions, particularly not on subjects we haven't devoted a great deal of thought toward. We don't necessarily care if the world recognizes our expertise, but if we claim expertise in a subject we haven't thoroughly vetted we judge such opinions as fraudulent and lacking sufficient evidence. So that pushback you're getting may be frustration that our knowledge of the subject isn't as extensive as we would like. Of course, when the topic is emotional (i.e. harder to pin down with pure logic) those feelings of frustration can be magnified.
I remember I once tried to get this intp to talk about his thoughts on certain things( I forgot what we were discussing) and he was getting progressively more and more defensive using humor as a shield. I, on the other hand, was pushing him more and more to become more serious but at the end it just became clear that he wasn't comfortable with me sharing that information. So I learned my lesson not to push an intp to talk about anything serious until they were ready lol
INTJs probably have an easier time explaining themselves because they rely on external facts and frameworks (Te) which are more easily referenced.
INTPs constantly offer up brilliant ideas and connections (Ne navigator). If they can learn to withhold some of that magic and refine it for their own gain, it can propel them quite far. Or they can just be a fire hose of nonsense, as is often the case. Similarly INFJs can carry on being battering rams/vampires of people's personal space, or they can learn some finesse and figure out how to get people to open up their doors when it's actually genuinely appropriate for them. And if it never is then to be totally accepting of that.
It's taken me a long time to realize I'm doing it and learned to tone it down, too much even. Many people are surprised but happy to open up. But it can also cause damage if the other person has difficulties with boundaries and the INFJ is a bit of a potato rushing where no potato has gone before.INFJs and people who tend to navigate with Fe often push boundaries of individualization without realizing what they are doing.
People in general have to go through a sort of on-boarding process of comfortability. And it's a healthy thing for people to have, as it gives a person a sense of personal identity and an individualized way of navigating. INFJs and people who tend to navigate with Fe often push boundaries of individualization without realizing what they are doing. You have to learn (sometimes the hard way) to respect the process, pacing and boundaries others set up for their own health and safety. You don't know their history, and it's a lot of words and energy to delve into for any person. It takes time. Fe navigators can sometimes be a bit like street hookers, offering up their feelings cheaply. Some do it because they're addicted, some do it because they know it'll help people, and some do it just to fuck around. Same thing with any function navigator. Why would you offer up any skill cheaply? At first it makes sense if you're just learning but then you start to understand the consequences and in theory integrate better discernment hopefully.
INTPs constantly offer up brilliant ideas and connections (Ne navigator). If they can learn to withhold some of that magic and refine it for their own gain, it can propel them quite far. Or they can just be a fire hose of nonsense, as is often the case. Similarly INFJs can carry on being battering rams/vampires of people's personal space, or they can learn some finesse and figure out how to get people to open up their doors when it's actually genuinely appropriate for them. And if it never is then to be totally accepting of that.
the INFJ is a bit of a potato rushing where no potato has gone before.
Wise words, Wyote, wise words
While it is stuff I have sort of been contemplating for a very long time, @Ren and @James both helped me recently really solidify some of my thoughts here.
I think intuitively (lol) I have always understood the importance of that process and all the varying elements, but as I've grown older I think I've come to a greater amount of respect for this specific idea. Sometimes I may lose sight of it sure, but ultimately my goal is to care for people in the best way that I'm able to and having to admit my own faults to myself has been a part of a growing process in this way for me. I'm pretty great at counseling others obviously, as is the natural skill of infjs, but I'd be a fool if I thought I were done improving upon my methods.
It's also possible to go into the other extreme
I surely have no idea what you're talking about :doopdeedoo: