Is Happiness A Choice?

Pin said:
Fair enough, how can I be more clear?
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I am just interested in what specific behaviors you have a problem with and what kinds of things you think could help in learning better/more productive behaviors.
You don't have to give me a lot or anything, it's a pretty involved discussion. I'm just generally curious, whatever you think on the subject.
 
Wyote said:
I am just interested in what specific behaviors you have a problem with and what kinds of things you think could help in learning better/more productive behaviors.
You don't have to give me a lot or anything, it's a pretty involved discussion. I'm just generally curious, whatever you think on the subject.
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I take issue with fear/nervousness and the hesitance that follows from that.
 
Pin said:
I take issue with fear/nervousness and the hesitance that follows from that.
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Do you think people should operate with no fear or hesitancy? What sort of boundaries do you draw, if any?
 
Wyote said:
Do you consider yourself an authority on safety?
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I think this is an important question for people to ask themselves in the pursuit of happiness, given that it is a choice and the limit lies within the bounds of safety.
However, I think happiness may generally be somewhere in a "testing grounds" that is in a buffer zone of non-safety, at least some of the time.
There is happiness to be gained in the pursuit of some level of danger.
 
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I don't think so. No. For a long time I thought happiness could be crafted through various different kinds of experiments with myself and others which would lead to the desired outcome, but it never seemed to work. Happiness is a result of certain conditions being met and in many cases those conditions end up becoming a result of the existing chaotic nature of things. Butterfly effects. Things falling into place as time passes and the flow finds a way to create whatever amalgamation that results in inculcating the feeling of happiness in a person. At most we can control some things (and a lot of things we think we control aren't actually under our control) but ultimately .. It's really just an illusion of control that we seem to give ourselves to make us feel like we created our own existence/life or whatever circumstance we exist in. Happiness (the feeling) isn't a choice anymore than breathing is a choice. It's an innate response reaction that something something creates within us.
 
Yes, I believe happiness is a choice. When we look at when we are happy, it is when things run the way we expect/wish them to e.g. when we reach something we wanted and we get unhappy when things run against our expectations. But the majority of humans fails to see that we have 0 control about the outcome of reality, there are so many factors in reality that are absolutely out of our own control.

The only thing in our control in this equation is our own expectations/wishes. Happiness doesn't get triggered by objects in the real world, but that is what we learn in this society.

Anyway here is a very simplified example:

Let's say you have to go to the post office do drop a letter. And let's say your previous experience tells you that there is gonna be a 5-10 minute queue.

Scenario 1: You arrive and there is no queue, you are done within a minute. Result: You feel most probably happy about it.
Scenario 2: You arrive and there is a few minute queue, you are done within 5 minutes. Result: You are feeling ok, nor happy or unhappy
Scenario 3: You arrive and there is a 30 minute queue. Result: You will get most probably upset and feel unhappy.

Don't believe me? You don't have to you can try it yourself, next time you are unhappy take a step back and check your expectations/wishes. It is nothing wrong to wish for something but at the same time one should be aware that the outcome is out of our control and things might be different.
 
BritNi said:
I discovered this comment in the forum, and I hope you don't mind, @Deleted member 16771, but I'm going to pick on you for just a moment.

This comment piqued my curiosity. I am hoping that you'll elaborate on this philosophy. I'm not saying I disagree. I am just seeking further insight and discussion.

I'm hopeful others with chime in and state their opinions as well. What does everyone think?



What I'm understanding: Your depiction of happiness is as if it's an external force or energy. It lives outside of our physical selves, and it's only when we come into contact with its force we experience happiness. ....AND....
We can call it to us: "Yoo hoo.... happiness, I'm thinking of petting puppies and stuff, come to me." So for a moment it stays with us, but it comes and goes at it chooses? It seems as if you're perceiving it from a sociological perspective.

What is the driving force of the state of happiness you describe? You say that it's not something that can be faked... but, what about the idea of "fake it til you make it?"

Is happiness not biopsychological?
Do you believe that it's possible to condition ourselves to be happy?
Do you believe that we can "exercise" our minds well enough that we can in turn control it?
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Happiness is a duty to yourself.

That said... Some people just seem to like being miserable - as if it's their duty.

If you want to be happy, it all on you. This requires introspection, and living within your values (*values that are not self destructive). Most unhappiness is when people are deprived of living within their values.

This is why it is so important that people hold their ground when confronted with things that oppose them.

Escapism (safe spaces), and caving in to expectations are sure fire methods of unhappiness.
 
wiredandwound said:
I've always wondered what the perspective is on why people don't believe in free will?
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It depends on how you perceive free will. We make choices based on what is stored in our memory. In that sense, our "free will" has already been decided in our brains.
However, our synapses work through quantum-physical processes, so there is a possibility that our choices are made by a certain quantum-randomness (thus making it non-deterministic).

biology says free will is an illusion: https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/memory-medic/201812/how-learning-and-memory-relate-free-will
physics says free will is a possibility: https://phys.org/news/2018-03-quantum-international-collaboration-brain-potential.html
 
dragulagu said:
It depends on how you perceive free will. We make choices based on what is stored in our memory. In that sense, our "free will" has already been decided in our brains.
However, our synapses work through quantum-physical processes, so there is a possibility that our choices are made by a certain quantum-randomness (thus making it non-deterministic).

biology says free will is an illusion: https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/memory-medic/201812/how-learning-and-memory-relate-free-will
physics says free will is a possibility: https://phys.org/news/2018-03-quantum-international-collaboration-brain-potential.html
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Here's my take on it:

Absolute wisdom demands that there is no free-will. What is wise to do is that what we must do. This is however, a fallacy. For people are incapable of this level of virtue.

I agree that we make choices based on our experiences (that stored in memory), but this does not prevent us from deciding to take alternate action. - example:

Holding one's ground in an argument about personal values goes against this. It is buried deep within us to preserve our social connections, especially with the ones we love.

It is very difficult to hold your ground in defence of your personal values. And this is why so many people choose to abandon them, at the cost of their happiness. It is a very difficult thing to choose to keep, and protect your values at the possible cost of a relationship. The abandonment of one's values is one of the most fundamental reasons for depression. Hence, the boone in the happy-pill market.
 
Funny how this got into free will. But as in the Hitchhikers guide to the galaxy, the answer to everything is 42. As in, anything. Everyone decides by themselves what that anything is in everything.
"The ASCII code 42 is for the asterisk symbol, being a wildcard for everything."

On the easier sidenote, I could write that, or I could write this asdasdaoihoghwoig

Idk, might be more free will not to do anything? Who knows right.
 
Disguised said:
"The ASCII code 42 is for the asterisk symbol, being a wildcard for everything."
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I never made that connection. Very cool!
Disguised said:
the answer to everything is 42. As in, anything. Everyone decides by themselves what that anything is
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We use 42 as a joke in engineering all the time. For us it means that "the answer doesn't mean anything if you don't know what the questions actually was".

When people try to prove a result by randomly manipulating a formula, they often come to false understanding of the result. This is actually very common mistake. It's one of the main reason that many physicists are often called out on their bullshit discoveries.
 
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