My friend abruptly...

And I could charge you with criminal negligence for keeping the poor monkeys in suspense. Who won the contest? They want to party!
 
Lucifer said:
So basically I talked to her and she said she doesn't want to be friends anymore without much of an explanation.

It wasn't that I was smothering her apparently I am the cause of a lot of stress for her.

What a bitch...

It's not like she is exactly a relaxing friend to have.

She doesn't deserve me.

I am sad I really did love her :m142:
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Well I guess this matter has already been resolved, but I'd like to say that I've done the very same thing your friend did numerous times. It was not because I was feeling smothered, but because I considered something the person I ignored had done as being completely against my ways and feelings (in other words, I considered it to be WRONG), and I thought that unless that person understood on their own what that was, then they would never actually do something about it.

Actually I used to give several warnings before I would go on to completely erase someone from my life, but most of the people actually ignored them and continued on without paying attention to what I had said.

And when I chose that path (to ignore a person), no matter what the other person would say, I would never go back, not even saying hello, ever again. Pretty selfish, but that's what your friend might have been thinking. In my mind, it was like "hey, I'm just leaving, I'm not hurting you or fighting with you, I'm just leaving the way I came".
 
Taz said:
Well I guess this matter has already been resolved, but I'd like to say that I've done the very same thing your friend did numerous times. It was not because I was feeling smothered, but because I considered something the person I ignored had done as being completely against my ways and feelings (in other words, I considered it to be WRONG), and I thought that unless that person understood on their own what that was, then they would never actually do something about it.

Actually I used to give several warnings before I would go on to completely erase someone from my life, but most of the people actually ignored them and continued on without paying attention to what I had said.

And when I chose that path (to ignore a person), no matter what the other person would say, I would never go back, not even saying hello, ever again. Pretty selfish, but that's what your friend might have been thinking. In my mind, it was like "hey, I'm just leaving, I'm not hurting you or fighting with you, I'm just leaving the way I came".
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So she expects me to be a mind reader?

*sighs*
 
Lucifer said:
So she expects me to be a mind reader?

*sighs*
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Depends. If you're close to her, then you know the way she thinks. What she considers evil/immoral/hurtful. If you were not that close, then, yes, she probably thinks you're a wizard.
 
Taz said:
Depends. If you're close to her, then you know the way she thinks. What she considers evil/immoral/hurtful. If you were not that close, then, yes, she probably thinks you're a wizard.
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Then call me Harry Potter LOL.

I did nothing immoral.
 
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Maybe she is running away. I'm not sure why, but for some reason she seems (angry?) at you. I can't offer why this may be the case, but I can't say what she is doing is unfamiliar to me.
 
sumone said:
And I could charge you with criminal negligence for keeping the poor monkeys in suspense. Who won the contest? They want to party!
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The pole closes tomorrow it looks like it will be a tie.
 
Oh! Monkey party! :mhula:


I don't think it is fair for anyone to expect anyone to read someone's mind. It is unreasonable and cruel. It is a sign of someone who isn't willing to communicate. That creates a situation where there is no trust.
 
I finally figured out what happened, I did some wrong things.

I gossiped about things I shouldn't have gossiped about.

I acted inapporpriately.

I will be more careful about that in the future.

Still think she was wrong in some parts to...

but such is life.
 
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Noticing an issue and attempting to resolve things has got to count for something, unless your friend is a weirdy.
 
Wyote said:
Noticing an issue and attempting to resolve things has got to count for something, unless your friend is a weirdy.
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Well I suppose.

I understand why she is angry with me

I was being inconsiderate

REALLY inconsiderate

but i wont accept parts of it

still i am responsible for my own actions there are parts of this issue that are my fault.

I feel bad and I should

I will get over it though. :m107:
 
I don't want to excuse myself of wrong doing but my mind seems to keep going in that direction.

I need a napp.
 
New rule: Be very careful about talking about serious issues with others.
 
Maybe she just wants to do her own thing and is tired of carrying other people's emotional baggage? Are you laying your emotional baggage on her too much, maybe?
 
Part of the problem might be that you're thinking about yourself too much. Try to forget about what you did, how you feel, what you might have done and all that. The whole thing might be an inner emotional turmoil that has very little to do with you. It seems like she needs space and it might be a good idea to patiently and quietly give that to her. If you meet up again in the future it might be different and there might be a chance.
If she's gone into mute withdrawal she might be in shadow mode and the best thing might be to steer clear.
Focus on your own self improvement and just let her get on with it, whatever it may be.
I liked that you tried with the letter but there's probably nothing more you can do.
Other than hang out here with us!
 
Lucifer said:
New rule: Be very careful about talking about serious issues with others.
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Tis a good rule. Most of the hot water I've landed in during my life was because I broke that rule, whether accidentally or on purpose.
 
This weekend I read a book about teenagers with ADHD/ADD. It seems like all of my friends have this disorder. Anyway, that information is partially irrelevant.

In this book, I read a quotation from a mother who was explaining methods on how to help her ADD child.

"I also give her the option not to talk."

It would be fantastic if everyone would do this. Sometimes people just don't want to talk/ be friends with you anymore. I see it as the world's cruel joke and my lips turn into a half downwards smile.

And hey, and if it helps, I have a friend who talks to me for a few weeks and then completely ignores me for 3-6 months before talking to me again. The cycle repeats itself. Eventually you get used to the normal flow of friends and their irrational conduct. Hey, some people thrive on this kind of action!

Although; I'm not a very good person to talk to about friends. According to one of my closest long term friends I "crush her dreams and romance of ever getting a guy who won't leave her after she gives it up to him, making her feel like fairytales don't come true and men are always unfaithful"
 
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Dutch Cake said:
Oh honey,
You seem so sweet. I can't imagine how this all fell apart, but sometimes it happens. I don't think you did anything horribly wrong nor she. Somethings don't work out. It wasn't nice that she didn't explain herself, but it isn't your fault nor is there anything you can do about it. Her actions have nothing to do with you. You tried and she didn't want to. I imagine you feel dumped and left out. My advice would be to do something for you today. Be Purely you and enjoy that which makes you , you.

I am so sorry. I just want to hug you and make you a daisy chain and cookies.
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I second DC's emotion...well, except for the cookies; they would only make you feel worse.
 
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