Public speaking

Quiet

Quiet

i know nothing
MBTI
infj
Enneagram
1w9
Public speaking

Can you do it?
How do you do it, any advice?

It doesnt seem to matter how well I know the topic and how prepared I am I always freak out when I realise people are looking at me. Then my heart states racing, my palms start sweating and I forget what Im saying.

I did a monologue for a show once, where I got to hide behind a curtain and speak- that went fine. I cant hide behind a curtain for my class presentation though.
 
Xanax...

In all seriousness though 5 shots of grey goose at 8 am...

but really I just have to be incredibly well prepared (confident in my work) -> I read it aloud to myself multiple times beforehand (make sure it all flows well). I try not to focus on the people; I'm usually staring at something else - occasionally glancing at the "crowd". It's never easy; I just try to get it over with early/quickly… so I don't have to worry anymore.
 
Practice, practice, practice in front of people. It becomes easier having done it repeatedly. Those great orators you see didn't get that way overnight. :) Theatre in high school trained me to project my voice ... so I can be very LOUD.
 
This is such a huge weakness for me. My dropping out of University had a lot to do with this (and the broader issue of Social Anxiety).

The few times I gave any presentations in High School, I feel like I really made a fool of myself. In fact I remember one specific time when someone outright laughed at me.

The only thing that would make it easier for me is if I was very familiar with the subject. Hard to do, but being somewhat of an expert at whatever you are talking about gives a certain amount of confidence.

I bet [MENTION=5084]Craig Weiler[/MENTION] has some good advice.
 
MikeINvalid said:
This is such a huge weakness for me. My dropping out of University had a lot to do with this (and the broader issue of Social Anxiety).

The few times I gave any presentations in High School, I feel like I really made a fool of myself. In fact I remember one specific time when someone outright laughed at me.

The only thing that would make it easier for me is if I was very familiar with the subject. Hard to do, but being somewhat of an expert at whatever you are talking about gives a certain amount of confidence.

I bet [MENTION=5084]Craig Weiler[/MENTION] has some good advice.
Click to expand...

Man that's rough, I know the feeling though - I have to know my material very well in order to be somewhat confident/get through a presentation.
 
I'm actually pretty good at public speaking. Why? Practice, practice, practice. I'm in Toastmasters, a non profit, non denominational organization dedicated solely to helping its members learn public speaking skills. There are clubs all over the world, so it's possible that there is a club near you.

Most of you are younger, so now is the time to start because it takes a few years to get comfortable. (I never said it was easy.) The people in most clubs are generally very supportive.

That's how you get good at it. You keep trying.
 
Here is a video. I wasn't a speaker, but I was interviewed. The bit on our club starts at about the 10 min. mark. You can see what I look like.

[video]http://blip.tv/toastmasters-bay-to-bay/episode-25-stapleton-and-table-topics-4253126[/video]
 
Craig Weiler said:
I'm actually pretty good at public speaking. Why? Practice, practice, practice. I'm in Toastmasters, a non profit, non denominational organization dedicated solely to helping its members learn public speaking skills. There are clubs all over the world, so it's possible that there is a club near you.

Most of you are younger, so now is the time to start because it takes a few years to get comfortable. (I never said it was easy.) The people in most clubs are generally very supportive.

That's how you get good at it. You keep trying.
Click to expand...

I've been thinking about joining Toastmasters.
 
Last edited:
I can definitely do it. I've given several presentations in front of large classes in my college courses the last couple of years. I'm usually not nervous. I've only been a little bit nervous couple of times.

If someone dared me to give the presentation in the nude, I would at a moment's notice--no hesitation. In fact, I would probably give a better presentation if I was nude and everyone else fully clothed because situations like that make me feel "uppity" (for lack of a better word). I think I feel that way because I disdain feeling scared with a passion, and I get pissed off about it and welcome still more of a challenge. I am internally saying "fuck you" to my fear, and expressing that outwardly by doing things that are supposedly scary, like giving a public presentation in the nude. I think this is why I'm okay with public speaking--I disdain feeling any fear. It pisses me off.
 
What has worked for me over the years is to step outside of myself, creating a buffer so to speak. Make it about the material, look over the tops of the heads of your audience. As mentioned by others here, Toastmasters, practice, Xanax, Grey Goose, :-) Try not to think so much. Good luck.
 
Why don't you make a video and post it here. You can post it in the blog section if you want to restrict who can view it. Invite a few people to watch it and give you some feedback. Maybe that can help.
 
Ame said:
Why don't you make a video and post it here. You can post it in the blog section if you want to restrict who can view it. Invite a few people to watch it and give you some feedback. Maybe that can help.
Click to expand...

That's a pretty good idea. I wish the Internet was around in my day.
 
Pick a few spots in the room (around the perimeter of the room) at which you can look when you are speaking, and move your gaze between these spots. Make sure they are located right around where people are sitting so you can give the impression of genuinely looking at people. Of course, it's helpful if you can pause and make obvious eye contact with the audience, but if that's not a possibility then try having a few reference points on which to focus. This allows the audience to blur away.

Do you meditate or have any strategies for relaxing/calming down? Use those before the presentation.

Ground yourself when you are speaking, and remember to breathe slowly and relatively deeply. It's amazing what a deep breath can do.

Everyone is right, practice can make this easier and often does. So whatever happens, perhaps consider this presentation as a stepping stone to being a confident public speaker. :)

Best of luck!
 
Being someone who prefers to sit in the background and take it all in, I have never been comfortable speaking in front of a group. Standing up in class to give a report was nothing but an anxiety attack.
When I was 35, I was at a managerial meeting at the company I was working for. The subject came up of a proceedure at work that many were having trouble with, but I was for some reason very good at.
Out of the blue, the owner of the company said, "At this point, let's take a 5 minute break. And when we come back, we will have Dale take over and go over how he handles this with so few errors."

:m123: (This monkey actually resembles him.)

After pounding down about 3 cigarettes outside, I went back in, and in a tunnel vision state of mind stumbled through the whole thing. Having to do it off the top of my head and all. Er...Umm..well....
In hindsight, I really should have spent those 5 minutes making quick talking point notes.
Man, I hope I never have to go through anything like that again!
 
I find having your notes/speech on regular 8.5/11 paper quite beneficial, I usually put some extra sheets in the back when I have to present, and try to focus my anxiety into my arms and into the large stack of paper, which I can hold onto as I give the presentation, it adds stability. Lots of practice helps too.
 
Sriracha said:
Practice, practice, practice in front of people. It becomes easier having done it repeatedly. Those great orators you see didn't get that way overnight. :) Theatre in high school trained me to project my voice ... so I can be very LOUD.
Click to expand...
Practice demystifies the situation and puts it into perspective. Once you do it enough times it becomes so easy you forget you were ever scared.


MissionHouse said:
I can definitely do it. I've given several presentations in front of large classes in my college courses the last couple of years. I'm usually not nervous. I've only been a little bit nervous couple of times.

If someone dared me to give the presentation in the nude, I would at a moment's notice--no hesitation. In fact, I would probably give a better presentation if I was nude and everyone else fully clothed because situations like that make me feel "uppity" (for lack of a better word). I think I feel that way because I disdain feeling scared with a passion, and I get pissed off about it and welcome still more of a challenge. I am internally saying "fuck you" to my fear, and expressing that outwardly by doing things that are supposedly scary, like giving a public presentation in the nude. I think this is why I'm okay with public speaking--I disdain feeling any fear. It pisses me off.
Click to expand...

That's how I got into performing. I was dead shy but to the point I was actually just totally fed up with myself of being scared. I jumped in to the deep end and learned how to swim. ...after some panicky splashing around... ;D
There was good tips mentioned already like keeping your eyes just above the heads of the crowd. Makes them think you're engaging them, even though they are blurry spots to you.
It helps if you're passionate about what you're presenting. For me I wasn't going to let an important issue not be received because of my nervousness. Just keep building your self confidence by challenging yourself. You'll feel good about yourself too when you face your beast. ;D
I like to just make very simple notes of the main points on paper, not too much, because if you get lost or draw a blank it's easier to get back on track when you have the outline and not a page full of miniature squiggles. Learn the broad concepts and some finer details. at some point after you've done it awhile you may find yourself contemplating outloud infront of a roomful of strangers....who by the way are most likely scared of giving speeches themselves and will think you're brave for doing it in any case. That one who laughs is a Q€#€45€!, ignore him. They've got the most to learn about life.
Is it worth it? For me it definetly was. It really boosted my self-esteem and made me more happy in all kinds of social interaction.
Keep it up! You'll thank yourself in the end.
P.S steer clear of jokes ;D unless you're being spontaneously funny!!! ...and too many aides. Keep it simple, short and sweet for a start.
 
Thanks everyone! Lots of great advice here that Im going to use.
 
Role playing, as in Dungeons & Dragons. Yep, seriously. I was in an AP European History class in high school despite being a "B" student and everyone of my "higher GPA" classmates and I had to give an oral presentation about a research project we were randomly assigned. Well, in short, all of those straight "A" students sucked. Everyone was nervous and everyone gave the same dry performance.

The bonus I had is that I knew the teacher from another class and he was a really easy-going guy who also had a rather odd sense of humor (I referenced Monty Python a few times on papers and he just started to fill the paper with red ink in Monty Python quotes).

The speech was on Castiglione's Book of the Courtier (IE. the royal book of manners)

So in light of all of that, I decided I was going to give a speech completely different and I actually started to role play the speech in front of everyone, treating them all like uncivilized slobs and referencing "the book" for proper manners. The teacher and his assistant were laughing themselves off the chair and my classmates gave me a bunch of "deer in headlights" looks.

You know what? From that point on, I don't actually fear public speaking anymore :) I discovered what makes it tolerable is interactive audience participation, asking questions, responding to jokes, etc. Professors in college got pissed off because my outline notes were all of about 5 words and didn't follow the standard format they gave us, but I'd be able to give a 5 minute presentation with those 5 words, so I must have been doing something right, right?

The other part was acting. Performance of Literature my Senior year on college. I must have been the only Business-related degree student in the class. But shattering that nervous barricade of "oh my god they're all staring at me!" and letting go of all of those reservations actually helped me no longer hate public speaking.
 
Last edited:
I have extreme nerves, like, my whole body starts reacting to the idea of public speaking, I get really nervous, and I've done it for yeaaaaars. It will never get better. But in the end you'll start finding the experience exhilerating, fun, exciting and worthwhile. The stress and nerves makes us play things out better, we usually perform better under stress. The first times, it might go badly, but just get back up and try again, I'm not happy about my public speaking from 5 years ago, but I'm damn glad I did them.
 
Asarya said:
Public speaking

Can you do it?
How do you do it, any advice?

It doesnt seem to matter how well I know the topic and how prepared I am I always freak out when I realise people are looking at me. Then my heart states racing, my palms start sweating and I forget what Im saying.

I did a monologue for a show once, where I got to hide behind a curtain and speak- that went fine. I cant hide behind a curtain for my class presentation though.
Click to expand...

Make a mistake and I am being serious here. Just one time, make a mistake because then the worst has happened and you don't have to fear it anymore. I have made mistakes more often than I can count and great speakers are those who are not afraid to make a mistake and when they do, they don't stop. Nobody is perfect so mistakes are bound to happen. This is why I never bring a paper or anything to read off of when I do presentations. I do plan them and write a speach with all the details I want to go over but I don't bring this up with me. I always just wing it and let my personality come out in my presentations. It is much easier when you don't force it and talk naturally. When you read from a paper or memorize a speach word for word, then it is not you speaking normal. It is you giving a speach and if you make a mistake then you have to try and figure out how to restart. If you are speaking normally but in front of people, it is just you so your not going off a script, you are just going off of what comes naturally to you.

Edit: I mean seriously, what is the worst that can happen? You make a mistake and people stare at you with a blank face because 90% of them are not even paying attention? If you don't even act on it, most probably won't even notice. Or you make it something fun and everybody laughs which makes the presentation fun instead of boring and dry.
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Back
Top