- MBTI
- INF
- Enneagram
- messed up
a reason to live?
Once upon a time i was a girl with nothing to live for...after losing my fiance to death so sudden. I thought of dying...leaving it all behind so many times...but so many people close to me leave through death I couldn't fathom dying in such a way...
I breathed, I slept...I was...but just a shell. after a time I was desperate to bring any feelings back into my life...anything. I found it it sex, drinking, and adrenaline. I was stupid, foolish, angry...Life held nothing for me but the thrill of bull shit...And the thought in the back of my mind...if I die accidentally...well then at least I didnt kill myself.
Here I am over a decade later...and you know what saved me from that empty shell of an existence...The accidental conception of a child...She saved me, and her father. Now we live for her, and each other. from there my life broadened...i see myself so much clearer. I know who I am, and where I am going, and what I want out of life.
Once upon a time i was a girl with nothing to live for...after losing my fiance to death so sudden. I thought of dying...leaving it all behind so many times...but so many people close to me leave through death I couldn't fathom dying in such a way...
I breathed, I slept...I was...but just a shell. after a time I was desperate to bring any feelings back into my life...anything. I found it it sex, drinking, and adrenaline. I was stupid, foolish, angry...Life held nothing for me but the thrill of bull shit...And the thought in the back of my mind...if I die accidentally...well then at least I didnt kill myself.
Here I am over a decade later...and you know what saved me from that empty shell of an existence...The accidental conception of a child...She saved me, and her father. Now we live for her, and each other. from there my life broadened...i see myself so much clearer. I know who I am, and where I am going, and what I want out of life.