Social media, texting and emojis- Unwritten rules of etiquette

Scientia

Scientia

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I was recently told that texting someone twice in a row without them responding was considered a "pass" of sorts.

What?

Also, he said a winking smiley means you want to have sex.

After watching me laughing at this, he said with a straight face that it was serious. So, I admit that I am socially moronic and this never occurred to me.

So I wondered ... What other unwritten social media rules am I violating?

What unwritten social media etiquette rules have you or someone you know violated? Stories welcomed!
 
Writing "ok." Means you are angry.
 
I was recently told that texting someone twice in a row without them responding was considered a "pass" of sorts.
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That, or they're busy/can't back to you right away.

Wait, winking smiley means you want sex? Uh-oh...
 
Some people will take the wink as being flirtatious or cheeky. Actually most people will. I thought it was common knowledge that when someone winks at you it is predominantly a sign of attraction or interest. A special little signal that says "I have my eye on you." Otherwise, something that would indicate a sort of secret knowledge, or "we both know different."

Depending on what you are texting, it looks desperate when you keep sending messages and a person doesn't answer. To me that reads, "this person didn't reply to my first message, so I better follow up with something else to get a reply... No reply yet, better send another with more information or something that will prompt a response... WHY IS X NOT MESSAGING ME BACK? I better jump to the wrong conclusion and send more texts that show how desperate I am for a response!" It's gross. Actually I generally find texting as a method of lengthy communication to be gross.

Other things that should be avoided are vague status updates or anything that looks like a ploy for attention. Vaguely indicating that there is a problem or something going on and not following up when people ask "Are you okay, hon? I am here for you! XOXOXOXOX <33333333333333333333333" makes you look like a fucking idiot.

Otherwise living your life through social media by posting about things in your regular day to day that no one gives a fuck about should be avoided also. No one cares that you checked in at the gas station, or that you are going to the grocery store or that you just had a coffee. It's like stalking in reverse where you are trying to get people to pay attention to every minute aspect of your day as if it matters or actually has significance. It doesn't.
 
Oh dear Zeus on Mount Fucking Olympus, I hate texting. Absolutely despise it. Especially when I'm dealing with people who follow 'rules' like this and read into everything. It makes it feel like a god damn chore and makes me feel uncomfortably like I'm on call 24/7.

I have a tendency to get sloppy about responding, not because I don't care, but because I'm either busy or otherwise can't shift my attention because otherwise, I will get distracted. I mean to get back to it and then I get a slew of other notifications that bury the other messages and I don't realize I missed a text or didn't reply to one until a few hours (or sometimes days) later. The people that understand this about me, I don't mind communicating via text. I treat it as an instant messenger and I can have a nice conversation. They know that my response time isn't tied to how I feel about them or that I'm playing any kind of a 'game.' It's that I'm genuinely busy with other things or I'm just in my space-case mode and I'll get back to them soon.

I tend to think of a text as a thing like 'I'll give you a call when I can' ... or when I can give you my undivided attention.
 
TooShyToSay said:
I actually think some of this is just borne of me being honest and uncontrived because I do send double texts sometimes when continuing a thought. So, I will send one text and then complete the thought with another. I had no idea that might be considered some kind of flaw or desperation, heaven forbid!

Thank you. Your information is helpful.

I have been called out for almost never updating people on my life unless it is in person. Hence, the ignorance of all these things. Combine that with double texts, smileys and other faux pas and I am afraid to communicate electronically at all!
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If this is the case, I honestly wouldn't worry about it. The fact that you get more face to face interactions and aren't living through your phone is better. I would ditch the smiley face shit, but that just comes from me hating them personally haha.
 
TooShyToSay said:
I actually think some of this is just borne of me being honest and uncontrived because I do send double texts sometimes when continuing a thought. So, I will send one text and then complete the thought with another. I had no idea that might be considered some kind of flaw or desperation, heaven forbid!

Combine that with double texts, smileys and other faux pas and I am afraid to communicate electronically at all!
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I double-text a lot too, but that's because me and my close friends hold conversations through text all the time and like [MENTION=12050]TooShyToSay[/MENTION] a lot of it is the continuation of a thought. I suppose to people who don't text frequently or I've just met may see it in the wrong light.

TheDaringHatTrick said:
Especially when I'm dealing with people who follow 'rules' like this and read into everything.
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Because these text conversations are with people I know very well, I don't follow "rules" either.

Soooo to anyone I message around here with winky faces, that's more of my way of keeping the conversation... erm, casual and light-hearted?
 
Horatio said:
I double-text a lot too, but that's because me and my close friends hold conversations through text all the time and like [MENTION=12050]TooShyToSay[/MENTION] a lot of it is the continuation of a thought. I suppose to people who don't text frequently or I've just met may see it in the wrong light.

Because these text conversations are with people I know very well, I don't follow "rules" either.

Soooo to anyone I message around here with winky faces, that's more of my way of keeping the conversation... erm, casual and light-hearted?
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That's what I thought. Apparently, we are both wrong.
 
lol winking does not mean you want to have sex imo. That isn't a hard rule. Ok does mean you're angry though lolo
 
Horatio said:
Soooo to anyone I message around here with winky faces, that's more of my way of keeping the conversation... erm, casual and light-hearted?
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I'm sure it is ;)
 
TooShyToSay said:
I would hope that the relatives and friends I have winked at have figured out that I am ignorant. Otherwise, the reunion this year will be especially awkward.
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Agree. I wink when I'm using sarcasm or being extreme as a joke to portray that I'm not serious. You aren't ignorant. I've never heard of it meaning that you want to have sex, that is ridiculous. Maybe a little flirty but that is reading a lot into a smiley. If I want to have sex with someone I'm texting Im doing more than sending a wink. Lol

Double texting...I double text all the time. Triple text, I don't even think about things like that. I don't think anyone thinks I'm being desperate or overbearing. I think the only hard and fast rule that will save you grief is that you shouldn't expect someone to respond to you immediately. I think assuming that other people are busy, or easily distracted, or have a lot going on at the moment is better than thinking they don't respond because they don't want to, or aren't interesting in what you're saying etc.

I do tend to think that ok = whatever. I've always taken it that way. I type out okay if I'm confirming I understood what someone said just in case there is no miscommunication there.

I think your instincts are spot on with texting, actually. I don't think you are ignorant or violating anything. However, I wouldn't text this guy with a wink smiley anymore or double post. What was the context of this conversation? Did you text him and he was telling you about his own rules you were violating or were you texting someone else and talking to him about it?
 
SpecialEdition said:
I hate all of them
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Help! Help! I'm being repressed by the violence inherent in the system!

[video=youtube;l8ukak8P2vY]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=l8ukak8P2vY[/video]
 
tell your friend he's a dumb sperger and that he should be looking at texting from a voice perspective and not a 'universal etiquette rules heh heh' perspective

wait maybe it's me. maybe i'm the dumb sperger. am i the only one who texts like i talk?
 
Unwritten rules don't work like world-wide. They work in certain communities, but texting is too widely done to create the absolute rules as you mentioned.
I use winky emoticons all the time, but I've never heard about the "I want sex" rule. Surely it could be an indication, but a rule?

Besides, if winks always mean 'I want sex', then you just might as well just say that instead.
 
Meh, stuff means stuff to people. Like TYPING IN ALL CAPS or using INTERMITTENT caps for TOO MUCH emphasis sounds VERY ANGRY. Also using excessive punctuation!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

This isn't really all that different in the end.
 
sprinkles said:
Meh, stuff means stuff to people. Like TYPING IN ALL CAPS or using INTERMITTENT caps for TOO MUCH emphasis sounds VERY ANGRY. Also using excessive punctuation!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

This isn't really all that different in the end.
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Haha! I see your point but I do think that the rules about winking smileys and double texting is a bit much. It just sounds ridiculous to me. One of my two overseas friends will text me continuously until I get back to them. It never entered my mind to think they were desperate or to assume they were making a pass at me. Is everyone a narcissist these days?
 
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