The "cool" factor . . .

[foureyes]

Although "cool" is not used that much anymore . . .

Nah kids still say cool nowaday. That slang term is timeless man! You didn't have to put it in quotations.
I hope no one is offeneded by this but for me coolness has to do with competence. Usually coolness reffers to social competence, being hip to all the norms and what have you. pfft like me! look at all my social normalness! haha yeah ppl don't still say hip nowadays x) maybe I should put it in quotations.
Anyway, the INFJ I know is regarded as cool I'd say because of how competent he is but not socially competent (tho he's not socially incompetent) but because he's more pracitically competent. Like his Se Ti paired with his judging function make hima really efficient individual. It's like he so interested in the practical that he doesn't even bother to worry about the social and that I don't care attitude is I guess what makes him come across as cool. And because people think he's cool he has a lot of friends with out even trying. x) Ahh, life is a paradox.

 

[Azure_Knight]

There's a monkey for this thread

 

[Zero Angel]

Cool people tend to have an air of 'nothings a problem', as if they can handle anything someone would throw their way and not let it affect them.

And some people are cool for the way they style themselves (ie: tattoos) because tattoos for example are viewed as unacceptable in some situation and here these people are just brazenly expressing themselves through it.

People like cool people for their their expression of calm and fearlessness, qualities which they with to have for themselves.

I guess INFJs can appear cool, depending on the situation and how emotionally stable the INFJ is.

 

[DeadlyPacifist]

I think I'm fantastic. Coolness included~ I like to think that people who don't agree are just not awesome enough to see it.

Lol

 

[Questingpoet]

I guess I missed this tread the first time though, but would like to comment. I think there are two kinds of "cool" and maybe both are being discussed here.

The first kind of Cool is the ice-princess motif. A detached and aloft persona. Someone who keeps to themselves for unknown reasons. Someone who is hard to get to know. The other is the Fonzie Cool. Easygoing, popular, trendy. An extravert really, as opposed to the other kind which would be introverted.

I think the first type is very INFJish. The second type, is not. Not to say we can't be trendy. I normally dress casual/stylish. But extraverted and popular (which implies larger groups of friends)--no. That's not us.

For myself, I was fairly withdrawn, kept my thoughts to myself, pondered things endlessly (all the classic INFJ introverted attributes) when I was younger. Definately not the second Cool.

Things change as you get older. With more experience comes confidence. With confidence can come that other Cool. Quiet confidence, along with wisdom and caring. Being your own person and being unashamed of it! That is where we INFJ's can get our other Cool. Ahyyyyyy!!

 

[Gaze]

Things change as you get older. With more experience comes confidence. With confidence can come that other Cool. Quiet confidence, along with wisdom and caring. Being your own person and being unashamed of it! That is where we INFJ's can get our other Cool. Ahyyyyyy!!

Yep. So agree.

 

[LORDCOSMOS]

@questingpoet:

I do think there are 2 kinds of cool also!

"HOT" cool

and "COLD" cool

HOT cool=popularity. This person is a social butterfly, swims effortlessly amongst all peoples, are liked and loved and favored by all. I don't see INFJ's as this kind of cool.


COLD cool=actually cool. This is somewhat stoic. This person is zen. This person is calm amidst stormy weather. This person has what i would call "a warrior's spirit" which is very innately cool. Intelligence is key, as is making the right move at the right time. This kind of person is completely content waiting if need be. This kind of cool, is the wisdom of the ages. Not to say this type of cool is a complete ice queen. They just tend not to get riled up over nothing. The opposite of a manic person, the cool person know when and how to expend their energies.




i.e. LORDCOSMOS


THE END

/topic

 

[Forest Dweller]

Things change as you get older. With more experience comes confidence. With confidence can come that other Cool. Quiet confidence, along with wisdom and caring. Being your own person and being unashamed of it! That is where we INFJ's can get our other Cool. Ahyyyyyy!!

I'm finding this to be very true near 40. I'm still shy, quiet, really nervous around new people, and still socially awkward. However, having had to get a completely new set of social connections getting a divorce in a place I've only lived in for a year, I've been pleasantly surprised. I can't say I'm popular in the sense of life-of-the-party popular, but I've found that people are more likely to pay attention to quiet people, or at least not dismiss them. It's not cool as in a detached loner. I really think people have more interest or skill in mid-life in getting to know people who run a bit deep under the surface, and there's more of an accommodation for them.

 

[Us er Na me:]

The difference between being shy and being cool is self confidance. I dont talk much and am fairly quiet. But I have never been called shy. If I have something to say I will say it. Been called cool by many people and its a compliment. I dont get nervous speaking in front of groups of people or one on one. I find that insecure people that talk incessantly (fake self confidance) are the ones that get unsettled around me, either because they know Im on to them or they dont know what Im thinking.