An underdeveloped Fe is going to be what the OP described as. In fact, I'm inclined to think it has more to do with confidence than actual development. For example, a person with a well developed Fe function could just be uncomfortable using it due to what his/her environment might require.
I think I am a product of my environment, as much as I disdain the thought of it.
I had a long think last night regarding the history of my Fe usage. I would have to say that I was in top form when I was a university student. This is most likely because of the environment tied to the college experience--people by and large were open to forming new relationships (friendships, etc.) and more accepting of others (my friendship circle was quite the eclectic crowd). I was often the 'go to' guy for issues/advice concerning my female friends (unrequited love, breakups, date rape, pregnancy, etc.), and sometimes for my male friends as well. In short, my Fe flourished as did I.
After graduating college I went to work as an instructor... at a college. Of course, again, I had no problems meeting/befriending people, but this was a commuter school as opposed to a liberal arts college (which I had graduated from), so it was little more slow going. Not to mention, as an instructor it just didn't 'seem right' to form friendships with students (I wanted to keep it professional). But nevertheless, I did well with my Fe (but not as well as when I was a student myself).
And then I moved to Japan, and my Fe 'died'. If one could ever succeed in ascribing a personality type to a nation or a culture, Japan (and Japanese) would definitely be granted the designation, ISTJ. Though I am sure that there are some decent, friendly, and nice people here, by and large, people here are fairly cold and distant, and what's worse, they aspire to be robots or automatons in all aspects of life (try to imagine Vulcans that are not as philosophical or insightful running around saying, "I don't know why... that's the way we've always done it..." and you kinda get the picture--without the pointed ears, of course). The concept of form over substance is pervasive here, so what you may consider Fe here (warmth and politeness in conversation exchanges) is all a show and lacks any amount of authenticity (the Japanese word for this is
Tatemae or literally, 'standing in front of you'). I've tried reaching out. About half of the time I get no response, the other half of the time I get fake response. Repeat that a few hundred or thousand times and see what happens to your Fe.
The irony of my Japan experience is that I came here to study Japanese (with the goal of full fluency), so I could communicate and form deep friendships with people from (what appeared to me as) a fascinating culture. However, the insularity of the culture, and the many friendship/relationship false starts I have experienced here have lead me to give up (Die, Fe! Die, you miserable piece of ****!!! LOL).
What's funny is that whenever I go to a McDonald's here, there will invariably be a Westerner who has gone a week or two without a 'decent hamburger' or a Big Mac, so you'll see him/her stacking up his tray as if there is a worldwide shortage of ground beef and other deep friend trinkets. I'm kinda like that Westerner whenever I go back to the States, except that I substitute a Big Mac with a heaping dose of Fe--I'm chatting with shopkeepers, random strangers at Starbucks, etc., and you can't get me to shut up. I have to get my 'Fe fill' before my week's furlough from my emotional prision is up.
I've always considered myself to be fairly well-balanced with strong Ti (I do suck at reading people more than other INFJs--but I think that's more of an Ni-Se issue rather than an Fe one), so perhaps I coped with my emotionally devoid environment by leaning on my Ti a little more than I should have.
, I prefer Gandalf to Legolas...Sometimes I even prefer Gandalf to Aragaron ( I said too much
