Can a male and a female be best friends?

The Jester said:
They both have a relationship with someone else.
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I only say this from experience, that doesn't stop attraction. I can't know their relationships nor am I on any level grounds to make an assertion that one or both of the indivdual have romantic feelings for the other. With that being said, I've known a couple whom dated other people simply because they believed they couldn't date.
 
Barnabas said:
I only say this from experience, that doesn't stop attraction. I can't know their relationships nor am I on any level grounds to make an assertion that one or both of the indivdual have romantic feelings for the other. With that being said, I've known a couple whom dated other people simply because they believed they couldn't date.
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This is becoming retarded.

Seriously, I understand why YOU don't think a deep relationship is possible between two people of opposite gender who are both straight, without any attraction.

This doesn't mean it goes up for everyone.

There are 6 billion + people on earth, so you could expect some diversity.

So YES, it is POSSIBLE. It just depends on the people involved.
 
I managed it for a while...in ninth grade, lol.

Starting to be able to manage to do it again - but I can tell that it's a fine line. It is SUCH a fine line. Mainly because I can be COMPLETELY and TOTALLY me around this friend, and he can be himself back at me, and that's fantastic, so I'm like "hmm, maybe?" I can tell it wouldn't be practical in the long run, and that's the main reason I'm keeping myself on the "friends" side of the dividing line.

In my experience - most of the "best friend" pairs I see around my campus are same-gender. There are a couple of fantastic roommate pairs in particular...
 
jlynnr said:
Starting to be able to manage to do it again - but I can tell that it's a fine line. It is SUCH a fine line. Mainly because I can be COMPLETELY and TOTALLY me around this friend, and he can be himself back at me, and that's fantastic, so I'm like "hmm, maybe?" I can tell it wouldn't be practical in the long run, and that's the main reason I'm keeping myself on the "friends" side of the dividing line.
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This ^^. When you can be yourself completely with a good friend, it will make you wonder whether it can and should go further. I agree with this especially - whether something should be pursued has to consider other factors, such as whether or not you're compatible, if both of you are available, or whether it would be practical for both of you to become romantic partners in the long term.
 
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No, I don't see this as a very likely scenario (assuming they are heterosexual). I suppose it is possible, but if you're best friends with someone who is physically attractive, it would be very hard for something not to happen. I think it would be torture to be best friends with someone who I liked but was only friends with.

The only possibility I see is if the people don't find each other attractive.
 
Restraint said:
This ^^. When you can be yourself completely with a good friend, it will make you wonder whether it can and should go further. I agree with this especially - whether something should be pursued has to consider other factors, such as whether or not you're compatible, if both of you are available, or whether it would be practical for both of you to become romantic partners in the long term.
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Yes, exactly - also, this particular friend and I have ALL the same friends. (It's actually really strange - I tend to have several different friend sets, but in the past three months they've all merged to become the same huge blob of friends.) It would mess with a lot of social dynamics if we suddenly started dating...which would be a good thing in some respects, but there are a lot of other factors to be considered with that as well.
 
Is it possible? Yes. It just depends on the two people and their situation.

You see, some folks fall in love rather easily. Or they're lonely. Or have no other prospects. Or they have subconciously harboured feelings for that person prior to the friendship. Whatever the case, there are just so many reasons why people fall in love with the people they do, and any one of those factors can possibly muck up those plans for a purely platonic male/female relationship.

But the real tricky thing is, you can never be certain when or how one of those factors might come about. Feelings are fickle things. So are male and female relationships.

It's always a gamble.
 
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in my own personal experience, yes.
 
The Jester said:
This is becoming retarded.

Seriously, I understand why YOU don't think a deep relationship is possible between two people of opposite gender who are both straight, without any attraction.

This doesn't mean it goes up for everyone.

There are 6 billion + people on earth, so you could expect some diversity.

So YES, it is POSSIBLE. It just depends on the people involved.
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never said impossible
 
I definitely think its possible based on the situation of the people involved, etc.

However, while I do have a male close friend, my "best friend" is a woman. I can't imagine sharing the level of personal thoughts and information with my male friend though. Especially when it comes to things about sex, dating and relationships. My male friend is mostly not interested when I express these types of thoughts. And to me, a "best friend" is someone I can really be myself with, you don't have to censor anything.
 
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