3w4 maybe? you strike me as quite composed
I don't see 3 so strongly in TDHT because I haven't really ever seen her as really eager to gain repore with people and promote oneself, but, I could be wrong. If she is a 3 I would guess 3w2. I see more of a 2 but saying that feels funny for some reason.
I'm getting more and more well versed with this system, but I still don't have all the types down pat. However, that said, I really don't think you're a 9. You're too passionate in conversation to be a 9. You have no trouble stating your opinion with enthusiasm and taking control of the conversation. .
Indigo said:
I don't see 3 so strongly in TDHT because I haven't really ever seen her as really eager to gain repore with people and promote oneself, but, I could be wrong. If she is a 3 I would guess 3w2. I see more of a 2 but saying that feels funny for some reason.
i haven't either actually, but from what i know of 3s they are usually poised, which is how i see her. maybe 1 would be more fitting? she seems to have a strong moral foundation
I PM'd you a few weeks ago, TDHT - and it seems like the consensus is pretty much equal. Mind you, it's still difficult to tell via the internet. To me, you're not mellow enough for 9 and definitely not keyed up enough for a 6. I'm taking 1, 4, 5, 7 right out of the equation, which leaves 2, 3, and 8. My personal opinion? You're not dogmatic enough for 8, but you don't seem as 'nice' as a 2 might be (hard to put that into good words).
So that's why I said 3 in the email. And to soften that 3-ness just enogh, 3w2.
Wow...and TDHT, if you are an E3, here's the company you'd also be with, according to this website:
http://www.purchase.com/blog/psychology/enneagram-type-3. Some are good fits, others...a bit crazy. But then, who isn't these days?
...
TDHT's not mellow enough to be a 9. She's an enthusiastic and passionate speaker. She's got a lot of warmth, and no problem interrupting to make a point before the subject shifts (and I don't mind that at all since I do it too). I wouldn't take 1 out entirely. She's quite an idealist, and passionate about how certain things should be. Though, I know a guy who is a 3 (my chiropractor who is into Enneagram), and she's got his energy level and seems to have similar levels of ambition. Then again, I could also see her as an 8, since we share that inner strength and refusal to be anything other than what we are. She's a force of nature unto herself.
Absolutely (although I hate talking about her in the third person as if she's not even here) - I rule out 8 because of my bias talking. E8 females are usually much more masculine in either appearance or mannerisms: Ann Richards, Bella Abzug, Barbara Walters, Bette Davis, etc. Although Courtney Love and Shannen Doherty are supposedly E8 as well.
I dunno. She doesn't feel like an E8 to me. Not really.
Holy smokes, that's quite a bit of insight into how I come across to people! I'm blushing, because I feel like I'm being given a wee bit too much credit here. lol.
Arby is right. I'm definitely
not a two. I care about people and I like to be helpful, but I definitely don't go out of my way to assist anyone. I generally think that most people are capable of helping themselves and I'm able to stand aside without feeling the itch to look over someone's shoulder and check up on them constantly. My mother is a textbook enneagram type 2 and sometimes she annoys the living crap out of me with her tendency to butt into everyone's business under the pretense of being "helpful." By comparison, I'm totally okay with not being needed or wanted. Rejection from other people doesn't bother me either as long as I feel like I have an upper-hand in the situation. I'm more bothered by poor self-assembly or under-performance; if I could have had control over the social situation and I somehow relinquished that control through some thoughts or behaviour of my own, that's what shakes my confidence.
Type 3 is a little warmer. I definitely relate to this:
Threes report that when they realize to what extent they have adapted their lives to the expectations of others, the question arises, “Well, then, what do I want?” They often simply did not know; it was not a question that had ever come up before. Thus, the fundamental dilemma of Threes is that they have not been allowed to be who they really are and to manifest their own authentic qualities. At a young age, they got the message that they were not allowed to have feelings and be themselves: they must, in effect, be someone else to be accepted. To some degree, all of the personality types have been sent the same message, but because of their particular background and makeup, Threes not only heard it, they began to live by it. The attention they received by performing in a certain way was their oxygen, and they needed it to breathe. Unfortunately, it came at a high price.
However, if I am a three, I'm certainly not even half as industrious as the profile seems to imply. While I do place stock in accomplishments and I am a little more materialistic than I care to admit, the goals I set out for myself are made with the intent to protect rather than define who I am. A lot of the time, I procrastinate and struggle like mad with the fear of the unknown (that includes the fear of success and fear of failure, if we're going to be tossing around some pop psychology terms). Furthermore, I'm not into the idea of having bragging rights. I want self-validation, but that's for
me not anyone else. I could be perfectly happy living in Castle Xanadu on top of a secluded hill somewhere and nobody knowing that I exist other than my family and friends.
I don't know if that all necessarily discounts the possibility of me being a type 3, but those were my initial misgivings when I re-read that profile.
I'm actually very surprised that everyone here doesn't see me as a type 9 (some more vehemently than others lol). And maybe to an extent, you guys are right, but I'm not sure if I can discount the type possibility completely, as much of that profile corresponds perfectly to how I am at home. I'm quicker to diffuse conflict, even at the expense of my pride (which, admittedly, I'll kick myself for later). I want peace and harmony in my home, free of conflict. The way I see it, the battleground is out there in the world.
This is the part about the 9 that resonates the most with me:
The really crucial problem for type Nine individuals is that they tend to have an inadequate sense of self. This leads to a tendency on the part of Nines to both downplay their own significance and to borrow a sense of significance from others. There is, in fact, a sort of paradox at the heart of the type Nine fixation. At a largely subconscious level, Nines intuitively grasp that the constructed personality, the personality with which most of us identify, is not the true self; it is not who they are. This is, in fact, a very deep truth; the constructed personality is simply that - a construct through which consciousness operates, much of it built out of defenses and reactions to dangers which are no longer present; it is, in a sense, both a limitation and an obscuration. But the constructed personality also serves a necessary function; it gives the individual a base from which to operate, a sense of self, however ultimately flawed and partial.
I'm considering that maybe an 8w9 or a 9w8 is a real possibility for me. What do you guys think?
