Do you think INFJs are clingy?

Being called out on your clingy behaviour is not the worst that can happen.
 
I know i tend to be clingy.. i like to have my space as much as the next guy.. but often times im pretty laid back and like to spend time with those few people I give my attention and admiration too.. i don't see anything wrong with that.. but others find it annoying....it's like they think i depend on them to live or something...i just want to spend time and be with them.
 
I think I am getting clingy with my ex bf. We aren't dating. But we are getting close. It feels wonderful to be near and with him. Waking up to cuddles is so blissful. But I have been trying to keep it down a bit.
 
Once I open up to a person (which takes a long time to achieve) I tend to become "clingy" unintentionally, as in a sense I like to talk to them a lot. Scares some people off because they had never realized before how much I had to say
 
minority funk said:
Once I open up to a person (which takes a long time to achieve) I tend to become "clingy" unintentionally, as in a sense I like to talk to them a lot. Scares some people off because they had never realized before how much I had to say
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Too true. The worst part, for me that is, is that I'll talk too much about my own interests.
 
I was thinking about this thread a bit as I have had waves of pretty strong loneliness since my SO is away for a couple months for work. I have had clingy feelings, but don't act on them that often. I think I seem more clingy from my own perspective than from someone else's. I wonder to what extent this is true for other INFJs. When compared to the average population, I think I would definitely seem less clingy than the average person, but maybe not have the full-fledged autonomy thing going on like the I-T- personalities. I do get moments of loneliness and insecurity in my life and it crosses my mind to act on these, but I don't often because being an intrusion or unwanted company is pretty nearly my worst nightmare.
 
Flavus Aquila said:
Too true. The worst part, for me that is, is that I'll talk too much about my own interests.
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I hear you, I almost feel guilty when I think back to it because I can make the conversations so centered on myself (but at the time I am completely oblivious to it)
 
Bored Now said:
True of me too. Not cold on the outside so much as not SERIOUS on the outside. It's more like Cyrano De Bergerac. I'll be playful and light and made of win, but on the inside I'm utterly consumed with longing. I'd write you sonnets and make my heart a beautiful paradise to delight your every whim... And I would never tell you until it was all over with...
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This describes me to a T. On the outside, I can be one of the most playful and charming people around, but on the inside I strongly desire a romantic connection. This is where the more Introverted part of my INFJ personality comes in and I am almost afraid to tell people how I feel for fear of loss. I sometimes wait until it blows over to say how I feel if I'm feeling afraid.
 
I'm with Tovlo.
 
Hm-hm-hrrmm.. I think it's a little more complicated. It's more like the INFJ can turn other people clingy about them. (the effect works on most types, not only ENFPs)

On a chess table, I imagine the INFJ as a static figure, that won't ever move, but could pull other figures into its limited area of influence. However, within this area, this figure has enormous psychic power, and can do almost anything with its enemies or friends.

I wouldn't call that type of functionality clingy. More like magnetism.
 
Cold on the outside, clingy on the inside...this reminds me of that teddy bear theory I seen somewhere..

INFJ-Cold outside,warm inside
INTP-Warm outside, cold inside
INFP-Warm outisde and inside
INTJ-Cold inside and out.
 
I am not clingy -at all, and neither was the INFJ I knew. So no, not all of us are.
 
I think if we can find someone we connect with, then yes, we get overly excited at the chance for some meaningful relationship.

On the other hand, if we are "mauled" we may never want to see your face again (even though it's permanently etched into our heads).
 
I'm not clingy and the other INFJ I know isn't clingy, but I guess some INFJs are ^^"
I'm actually quite adverse to clinginess, though I did used to be pretty clingy towards my twin XD
 
laofmoonster said:
I'm clingy on the inside, cold on the outside.
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Yep. Pretty much the same. And I really hate that I am. It's a major weakness for me. I think I give others too much credit and control over my person and emotions because of my tendency to get very easily attached if I connect with or am interested in them. Then, this gives them room to manipulate and take advantage. Wish I was a stronger person. And because they're the one to break off the friendship, I consistently experience fear of rejection or abandonment because of my fear that I'll exude that clingy nature. So, yeah. For some, clingy may be considered a cute or quirky quality, but not in my case.
 
slant said:
I suppose at the 'getting to know you' phase of a friendship I can be fasinated and clingy but after I understand that person interest pretty much fizzles out.
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Me too, if I get to the 'getting to know you' phase because I hardly get interested in interacting with someone.
 
I think sometimes we can be, especially if we're bored or something. I don't know.
 
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