sheisredeemed
Newbie
- MBTI
- ENFP
- Enneagram
- 7
Hello INFJs! I joined this forum after become acquainted with an INFJ male and experiencing a connection with him. Trying to get to know more about INFJs since is still such a mystery to me, so my Ne in curious explorer mode... 
Basically we're both in the same academic grad program, and have become friends through interaction in class. The similarities between us are that we both have a sarcastic/judgmental edge to our sweetness, we enjoy the theoretical facets of our frield of study, we tend to gaze intensely at each other without needing to acknowledge it verbally, we comment on people around us (rather than sensory details and scenery), we're perfectionists, we're a little clumsy, and we both cherish having lots of time to ourselves to think and work alone. He's helpful and accommodating--people-pleasing--like myself. He seems sensitive and in tune with emotions like me, which is refreshing to find in a guy. It's quite comfortable. I'm not nervous around him despite being attracted to him. He seems accepting like I am, which frees me to be myself and not question what "face" to show him. Us ENFPs tend to do that social chameleon thing a lot, so it feels good to be around him. We finish each other's sentences sometimes, too.
The differences between the two of us seem to be complementary is some ways. He's very meticulous and thinks more linearly... by the book so to speak. I think of innovative ways of solving problems better whilst overlooking sometimes crucial minor details. He reminds me of how important memorization and sustained effort is, and I'll show him connections between concepts, or random bits of information, that help him to solve problems we haven't seen before. We'll figure out the homework problems that the other person doesn't get. He doesn't seem to be nearly as vocal about his ideas and his feelings which leads me to believe he is just very private and or/thinks a lot more before he speaks than I do. The biggest difference lies in how reserved he is compared to my outspokenness in class and in a social setting. I can be chatty and expressive with strangers and friends alike, but he comes alive only around people he knows, becoming smiley and making jokes in contrast to his quiet, observant demeanor. He seems better at responding to other people's feelings and being comforting, whereas that can feel very unnatural for me. I think he can read my emotions better than I can read his.
He is less tolerant and little more uptight than I am, despite being so accepting much of the time. I don't care if other people are late to class or ask questions indicating they haven't read the material, but that seems bother him a little. He doesn't smile when he stares at me sometimes, whereas I'm always inclined to smile when making eye contact with someone I like. Finally, he seems more ethical than I am in regards to playing by the rules and not cutting corners, but we both seem to have strong values when it comes to interpersonal relationships and serving humanity with our careers someday.
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Anyways, have any of your INFJ males experienced a connection with ENFP females? Did you find that you had a lot of similarities, or were they mostly superficial?

Basically we're both in the same academic grad program, and have become friends through interaction in class. The similarities between us are that we both have a sarcastic/judgmental edge to our sweetness, we enjoy the theoretical facets of our frield of study, we tend to gaze intensely at each other without needing to acknowledge it verbally, we comment on people around us (rather than sensory details and scenery), we're perfectionists, we're a little clumsy, and we both cherish having lots of time to ourselves to think and work alone. He's helpful and accommodating--people-pleasing--like myself. He seems sensitive and in tune with emotions like me, which is refreshing to find in a guy. It's quite comfortable. I'm not nervous around him despite being attracted to him. He seems accepting like I am, which frees me to be myself and not question what "face" to show him. Us ENFPs tend to do that social chameleon thing a lot, so it feels good to be around him. We finish each other's sentences sometimes, too.
The differences between the two of us seem to be complementary is some ways. He's very meticulous and thinks more linearly... by the book so to speak. I think of innovative ways of solving problems better whilst overlooking sometimes crucial minor details. He reminds me of how important memorization and sustained effort is, and I'll show him connections between concepts, or random bits of information, that help him to solve problems we haven't seen before. We'll figure out the homework problems that the other person doesn't get. He doesn't seem to be nearly as vocal about his ideas and his feelings which leads me to believe he is just very private and or/thinks a lot more before he speaks than I do. The biggest difference lies in how reserved he is compared to my outspokenness in class and in a social setting. I can be chatty and expressive with strangers and friends alike, but he comes alive only around people he knows, becoming smiley and making jokes in contrast to his quiet, observant demeanor. He seems better at responding to other people's feelings and being comforting, whereas that can feel very unnatural for me. I think he can read my emotions better than I can read his.
He is less tolerant and little more uptight than I am, despite being so accepting much of the time. I don't care if other people are late to class or ask questions indicating they haven't read the material, but that seems bother him a little. He doesn't smile when he stares at me sometimes, whereas I'm always inclined to smile when making eye contact with someone I like. Finally, he seems more ethical than I am in regards to playing by the rules and not cutting corners, but we both seem to have strong values when it comes to interpersonal relationships and serving humanity with our careers someday.
------------
Anyways, have any of your INFJ males experienced a connection with ENFP females? Did you find that you had a lot of similarities, or were they mostly superficial?
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