help please

Grey Wolf said:
the problem is that nowadays we get little private time together cos we're constantly working with other people and they gossip as if every time they gossip they get paid a bonus. which is why I dont want to give them any more ammunition. cos I'm not even sure if this is allowed hehe. she doesnt drink coffee sadly.. but at the same time we have been chatting almost non stop sometimes. like I just chatted with her for about 2 and a half hours through fb chat haha. thats like our go to now cos not much choice also since face to face hard haha. and lunch same problem...people see, they start to talk, we die.. hell yeah! sounds good hahaha
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Phone, man! it's more intimate than fb but still not face-to-face. Personally I'm afraid of phones as a plague but you gotta do what you gotta do :)
 
Grey Wolf said:
the problem is that nowadays we get little private time together cos we're constantly working with other people and they gossip as if every time they gossip they get paid a bonus. which is why I dont want to give them any more ammunition. cos I'm not even sure if this is allowed hehe. she doesnt drink coffee sadly.. but at the same time we have been chatting almost non stop sometimes. like I just chatted with her for about 2 and a half hours through fb chat haha. thats like our go to now cos not much choice also since face to face hard haha. and lunch same problem...people see, they start to talk, we die.. hell yeah! sounds good hahaha
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:lol::lol:

Here, nothing like a little 60's musical to spur romance:
http://youtu.be/H8zyF0ZOy3k
 
or this [youtube]E8gmARGvPlI[/youtube] :laugh: the season is coming!
 
ISFJs become fiercely protective of the people we care about. Even when the other person might forgive the person that did them wrong ... the ISFJ may not (even though the ISFJ was never involved.) For myself, I see patterns in people's behavior. Patterns = predictability. So that begs the question: Who would I care about in order for those protective instincts to come out? Obviously close friends, family and even strangers who cannot defend themselves.

Her willingness to see you in that light says something about how she feels towards you. How I would react today as a mature woman vs. how I would have acted at age 20 are two entirely different things. There are times when I was age 20 and had no problem being the pursuer of a relationship. I may be somewhat traditional, but not in that respect. I think people who are young have a difficult time communicating what they want, as you get older you realize how much time you waste trying to figure people out when you could have just asked in the first place. LOL

Ask her to coffee and see what she says. :)
 
Ada said:
Phone, man! it's more intimate than fb but still not face-to-face. Personally I'm afraid of phones as a plague but you gotta do what you gotta do :)
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sounds good! I'll sms her on sun like casually ask her haha

this is only temporary said:
:lol::lol:

Here, nothing like a little 60's musical to spur romance:
http://youtu.be/H8zyF0ZOy3k
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HAHA WTH!!
Ada said:
or this [youtube]E8gmARGvPlI[/youtube] :laugh: the season is coming!
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HAHAHAH this is one interesting season

Sriracha said:
ISFJs become fiercely protective of the people we care about. Even when the other person might forgive the person that did them wrong ... the ISFJ may not (even though the ISFJ was never involved.) For myself, I see patterns in people's behavior. Patterns = predictability. So that begs the question: Who would I care about in order for those protective instincts to come out? Obviously close friends, family and even strangers who cannot defend themselves.

Her willingness to see you in that light says something about how she feels towards you. How I would react today as a mature woman vs. how I would have acted at age 20 are two entirely different things. There are times when I was age 20 and had no problem being the pursuer of a relationship. I may be somewhat traditional, but not in that respect. I think people who are young have a difficult time communicating what they want, as you get older you realize how much time you waste trying to figure people out when you could have just asked in the first place. LOL

Ask her to coffee and see what she says. :)
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wheee made her smile like an idiot today when I moved her chair when she went for a meeting and she came back blur HAHAH. she told me that herself haha. ok I'll ask her out for dinner after work on monday! I'll ask her on sunday through sms like casually haha. go for some dinner in a mall nearby and then if we still have space treat desert from a chocolate shop; max brenners if you have heard of it hehe
 
this is only temporary said:
I was taken out for chocolate frequently by my husband when we were dating. Just sayin'. Molten chocolate cake + Chris Issac and you could start getting to know her really really well....
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HAHA I heard that place has epic lava cakes! kinda expensive though... ah what the hell. not everyday anyway haha I'll see if she wants it cos I'm afraid it might be a little awkward cos we'd be sharing a desert haha
 
ah! asked her yesterday before I went for the tommy emmanuel concert. holy crap was he fantastic.. seriously mind blowing..

anyway she said no HAHA. but she said dont want dinner so I asked her what she wanted she said it was too soon hahaha. I told her I'll take too soon over over my dead body anyday HAHA

so at least now I know where I stand and lets see where this goes! maybe ask her out again in 2 or 3 weeks is theres a good opportunity!
 
HAHAHAHAHAH ah well turns out she doesnt like me that way. she just smsed me telling me she doesnt want to lead me on and shes just being friendly.

ah well, life goes on! I actually find it kinda incredible. for the first time I actually dont feel.. depressed/sad/ negative.

my brain somehow managed to take this as a learning experience and just move on! still feels funny dont get me wrong, but I'm actually ok! and we're ok too.. I hope.. hahaha no hard feelings and actually in a way i kinda expected it hahaha
 
Grey Wolf said:
HAHAHAHAHAH ah well turns out she doesnt like me that way. she just smsed me telling me she doesnt want to lead me on and shes just being friendly.

ah well, life goes on! I actually find it kinda incredible. for the first time I actually dont feel.. depressed/sad/ negative.

my brain somehow managed to take this as a learning experience and just move on! still feels funny dont get me wrong, but I'm actually ok! and we're ok too.. I hope.. hahaha no hard feelings and actually in a way i kinda expected it hahaha
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Way to go, you are doing great, and it was a learning experience, and you just never know what might happen next if you remain open to experience... :hug::hug:
 
this is only temporary said:
Way to go, you are doing great, and it was a learning experience, and you just never know what might happen next if you remain open to experience... :hug::hug:
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thanks! yep it was! and yeah man no idea what may happen haha happy enough to have her remain as a friend! ah the military somehow managed to make my mindset better haha. If this happened before i had to serve my national service I probably would have died (figuratively of course) hahahaha
 
oh my feth...

I just a place to rant.. really didnt wish to dig this back up

she just did a total 180 on me. she literally just told me that she is not uninterested in me. sent my world completely spinning. its still spinning.

I was right all along shes just frakking scared of getting hurt. I told her why not just try this out and she keeps avoiding it or rather just dragging having to answer the question as much as possible. not sure is this an ISFJ thing or a her thing

shes still on that topic just that she refuses to answer on me asking her to try just once and see how. fething new to me this. I'm not entirely sure what to do now. charge forth or hang back. I feel like nows the time to charge though. gates been open so send the cavalry crashing through.

just a rant. thoughts appreciated though!!
 
Dude, if you really like her.. If you find her to be someone you would like to have in life as a friend. If something in her really got to you so your mind is keep coming back and you've got this knot in your stomach & it just doesn't go away.. Perhaps, it's good to maintain friendship. Perhaps, she is just tired of men that want to own her and she needs someone who would not want to bed her right away and be her friend instead.. If you are ready for it and it is important to you just be very careful, tread lightly, don't show that you have feelings, that might scare her. Take things easy, nice and slow, don't be romantic. It just seems what she wants from you.. And then, perhaps, the relationship will develop on a great foundation. It's ultimately up to you. And if you don't want to play around, could really care less, and don't want to waste your time on her, - move on and find another interest.
 
AhSver said:
Dude, if you really like her.. If you find her to be someone you would like to have in life as a friend. If something in her really got to you so your mind is keep coming back and you've got this knot in your stomach & it just doesn't go away.. Perhaps, it's good to maintain friendship. Perhaps, she is just tired of men that want to own her and she needs someone who would not want to bed her right away and be her friend instead.. If you are ready for it and it is important to you just be very careful, tread lightly, don't show that you have feelings, that might scare her. Take things easy, nice and slow, don't be romantic. It just seems what she wants from you.. And then, perhaps, the relationship will develop on a great foundation. It's ultimately up to you. And if you don't want to play around, could really care less, and don't want to waste your time on her, - move on and find another interest.
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had a little hard time reading your post but I think i get what you mean haha. agree too! ah see what she says haha
 
all you can do is step back and give her time. it's a good idea to decide for yourself how much time you're willing to give before you do so though. life moves forward with or without you, so know when you're done is all.
 
yep I told her all I could tell her at this time already. So I told her she doesnt have to tell me right now but just not 3 months later haha. we're still talking normally so its not too bad i guess. oh well. like you said JGirl, life moves on, with or without me and with or without her as well HAHA
 
well, she texted me this morning saying lets give this a shot so we'll see how this goes from here on out! havent asked her out on a date yet though. I wanna let things settle a little first. we still talk pretty much daily though ahha
 
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