How Important are Men's Opinions About Women to Women

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Peppermint said:
Personally, I can't understand why others get offended if they don't fit someone else's preference, unless they're actually interested in said person.
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Because it's not about offense, it's about a specific form of narcissism that masquerades as offense.

Also: agreed with the rest of your post.
 
Flavus Aquila said:
How important are men's opinions about women to women?

*Some topics of being judged, notions of beauty, attitudes, etc. came up in another thread*.


(I was going to start a thread going the other way, but realised that it would probably require same-sex versions as well, and I'm not willing to start that many threads on a touchscreen keyboard.)
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Not important at all. Unless you are a psychologist that specializes in human sexuality or something.
 
Not at all...
Another's opinion of me is really none of my business.

I've been jaded through a life of being tossed up on the proverbial chopping block and examined similarly as a horse trader turns back a horses lip to check its teeth then refuses to buy based on said teeth, regardless of how fast the horse can run a track.

Now, I find these men laughable, :D yet, I feel sorrow for them in their inability to judge a filly by her merit.
 
Any opinion about anything doesn't matter when the opinion is rooted in a lack of understanding concerning the subject. People needn't have opinions on things they don't know much about, but many consider the right to have an opinion valuable regardless of how ignorant they are concerning the matter at hand. However, to use gender to validate any opinion on anything (including opinions of the opposite sex) is sexist. Exceptions to this would be a man's opinion on what it feels like to be pregnant, give birth, have a period, etc... However, opinions about women are not limited to female ailments. Ultimately, an opinion on anything matters if it is grounded in any true understanding of what it is in regard to.

Flavus Aquila said:
How important are men's opinions about women to women?

*Some topics of being judged, notions of beauty, attitudes, etc. came up in another thread*.


(I was going to start a thread going the other way, but realised that it would probably require same-sex versions as well, and I'm not willing to start that many threads on a touchscreen keyboard.)
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Flavus Aquila said:
How important are men's opinions about women to women?

*Some topics of being judged, notions of beauty, attitudes, etc. came up in another thread*.


(I was going to start a thread going the other way, but realised that it would probably require same-sex versions as well, and I'm not willing to start that many threads on a touchscreen keyboard.)
Click to expand...
 
Gemdraco said:
Any opinion about anything doesn't matter when the opinion is rooted in a lack of understanding concerning the subject. People needn't have opinions on things they don't know much about, but many consider the right to have an opinion valuable regardless of how ignorant they are concerning the matter at hand.
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Meanwhile, in reality: what you're saying shouldn't happen is exactly what does happen and that is why this discussion exists. When we get to utopia, feel free to weigh in again.
 
This is coming only from a personal observation and personal experience, but I do think women (and men) do care how they are perceived by members of the gender they would like to attract. When people say they 'care' in this context I think it unfairly conjures up an image of people-pleasing, attention-whoring or a lack of self-esteem and because of this, most will vehemently deny they care at all when 'caring' really doesn't have to mean anything that ego-disruptive. I think it's normal to be curious about how you are perceived by others. In fact, I think it's healthy. We are a tribe animal and even the most non-conformist out there are always conforming somehow because we have an inner drive to belong, to be wanted...even desired. It strokes *our* egos just as much as it can harm our egos to admit it.

I do care how I'm perceived. I do like to know if I'm attractive to the opposite sex. I'd like to know what kind of partner I'm likely to attract. It's important data. After all, I do the same. I think about what kind of partner I'd like and I'm sure my opinion, while not paramount to someone's ego, might give them some data they need to gauge where they are at too.
 
Korg said:
Meanwhile, in reality: what you're saying shouldn't happen is exactly what does happen and that is why this discussion exists. When we get to utopia, feel free to weigh in again.
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Again, many people have opinions with no value regardless of gender and regardless of what the topic is due to not knowing when to remain silent or just say: "I don't know". I never said discussions like these don't exist due to everyone knowing what they're talking about all the time. Utopia is unrealistic and, in all likelihood, should we ever achieve what appears to be such a thing, it will probably be a dystopia in reality. I don't need a utopian society to simply disregard opinions of zero value when I see them written or hear them spoken.
 
Korg said:
^ not trying to be a dick, by the way. My point is the thread is about the existence of those opinions and their relevance, not whether or not they should exist / be expressed.
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I'm all for expressing opinions. This particular question is asking if opinions regarding an entire topic can be automatically invalidated when coming from an entire gender. People not knowing what they're talking about concerning a given subject is one thing (and I simply disregard such a thing when I know better); dismissing an entire gender's "opinions" on the opposite sex due to them not being one of them is simply silly. How then can we reach any truth concerning anything we are not?
 
Gemdraco said:
I'm all for expressing opinions. This particular question is asking if opinions regarding an entire topic can be automatically invalidated when coming from an entire gender. People not knowing what they're talking about concerning a given subject is one thing (and I simply disregard such a thing when I know better); dismissing an entire gender's "opinions" on the opposite sex due to them not being one of them is simply silly. How then can we reach any truth concerning anything we are not?
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You're reading things into the topic.

I'm trying to understand why women spend so much effort on presenting themselves a certain way around men (appearance, perfumes, ways of speaking, etc).

Women's self presentation seems to vary significantly depending on whether they're home, among other women, or around men.
 
Flavus Aquila said:
You're reading things into the topic.

I'm trying to understand why women spend so much effort on presenting themselves a certain way around men (appearance, perfumes, ways of speaking, etc).

Women's self presentation seems to vary significantly depending on whether they're home, among other women, or around men.
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Sorry, I'm not trying to create conflict. I hate it as much as the next INFJ. Enjoy the process of analyzing women.
 
Gemdraco said:
Sorry, I'm not trying to create conflict. I hate it as much as the next INFJ. Enjoy the process of analyzing women.
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I was actually hoping that women might be the ones providing the insights on this thread.

Ask them questions, to get more insights.
 
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