Asian_Warrior86
Newbie
- MBTI
- INFJ
- Enneagram
- Type 9
I had 2 serious relationships. Both relationship lasted more than 2 years.
How many relationships have you been in?
- Thread starter nyc bred
- Start date
jupiterswoon
Permanent Fixture
- MBTI
- ISFP
- Enneagram
- 3
I was in one "high school" relationship that lasted for four months- until I realized we were incompatible. He was I'm guessing an ESTP- who was a 'poet'. He didn't take the relationship seriously, I did, we broke up and got back together three times, but we kept hurting each other and it wasn't worth it- not stable, he wasn't dependable. I was looking for something else entirely different, but I was advertising myself the wrong way, I was pretending to be an extravert but I was not.
After that I didn't date for about two years. I would occasionally "date" socially, and kiss guys, but nothing serious. During that time I developed a lot, and although I wasn't actively looking I began to piece together the kind of guy I wanted to date. Looking back on it now, I was always much more attracted to introverts- although I didn't know what to call it- just strong silent guys. Strong as in strong willed. My first boyfriend confused me because I thought he was shy and timid, but he was a party animal. After dating him I wanted to get to know people better first before dating them.
Before I had started dating my first boyfriend, I met this guy on the bus who was a friend of someone I was interested in at the time. We had a very natural conversation, and although I was a little stoned, I appeared to be more interested in the conversation than my friend. When I changed schools, I was in an art class with this acquaintance's sister. She told me he knew me, and I was perplexed, there was mystery. He came to school and saw my art, and was really struck by it. She was very intuitive, and thought that the both of us would get along well. Later we became friends on myspace. Then I dated my first boyfriend, and he dated someone else. We occasionally chatted on myspace, and hung out once or twice. We always made an effort to keep in touch. We both had similar humor and interests. We knew each other for about two years before we dated, so we had a good idea of what the other was like. We've been together now for six years, and it's no surprise that we have very similar personality types. He is an INTJ and I am an INFJ- and although our personality types are similar, knowledge of the Meiers-Briggs types has really helped us overcome the Fe/Fi slump of miscommunication.
Long story short, I've been in 1 and 1/2 relationships.
After that I didn't date for about two years. I would occasionally "date" socially, and kiss guys, but nothing serious. During that time I developed a lot, and although I wasn't actively looking I began to piece together the kind of guy I wanted to date. Looking back on it now, I was always much more attracted to introverts- although I didn't know what to call it- just strong silent guys. Strong as in strong willed. My first boyfriend confused me because I thought he was shy and timid, but he was a party animal. After dating him I wanted to get to know people better first before dating them.
Before I had started dating my first boyfriend, I met this guy on the bus who was a friend of someone I was interested in at the time. We had a very natural conversation, and although I was a little stoned, I appeared to be more interested in the conversation than my friend. When I changed schools, I was in an art class with this acquaintance's sister. She told me he knew me, and I was perplexed, there was mystery. He came to school and saw my art, and was really struck by it. She was very intuitive, and thought that the both of us would get along well. Later we became friends on myspace. Then I dated my first boyfriend, and he dated someone else. We occasionally chatted on myspace, and hung out once or twice. We always made an effort to keep in touch. We both had similar humor and interests. We knew each other for about two years before we dated, so we had a good idea of what the other was like. We've been together now for six years, and it's no surprise that we have very similar personality types. He is an INTJ and I am an INFJ- and although our personality types are similar, knowledge of the Meiers-Briggs types has really helped us overcome the Fe/Fi slump of miscommunication.
Long story short, I've been in 1 and 1/2 relationships.
hippie
Newbie
- MBTI
- INFJ-T
guess i got lucky meet my ex. wife when i was 17 she made the first move oicked me out of everyone there by the pool side.
was with her for 31 years im now 47 , i guess she finally ran out of patients and i had to ask her to leave ( lust & greed will get you every time) that was 14 months ago but it was a good 31 yr. raised a son put him through collage and he now has a son of his own . i wish i could take credit for our long relationship , but even i cant buy that bull . It was all her patiants and understanding and all around good soul. i miss her more than i can express , and am facing the fear of the unknown . i have never dated , and not the most social guy and im old , OOOOMMMMMM , lol so give it your all . enjoy life and best of luck to you in your search for "THE ONE"
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You're just too much of a chad
lmfao I'm keeping this forever. Thank you <3
Peppermint
Well-known member
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0.5 to 1.5, depending on how you look at it
Anomaly
Selah.
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- 9w8 sx
Serial monogamist, if/when I commit. 3 long-term relationships of consequence.
My dating life has been a tragic comedy. There were many years of keeping away from any and all relationships or dating, and instead focusing on my work or learning; especially, given the amount of men I came across who were wholly uninteresting or creepers (stalking me or showing up at my work, or spying on me to approach my friends to ask about me). Then, enduring a trauma that left me reeling, and needing time to heal.
Be discerning, friends. There is a huge difference between someone who simply has a lot of baggage that they need to unpack, and someone who will psychologically mess you up due to their own demons that they aren't willing to work through in a healthy way. One way to tell? If they can acknowledge the baggage or what they went through and are seeking ways to heal. If they are not willing to look at it, or admit it, then this a huge red flag; especially so if they highlight your own inadequacies so that the focus is shifted back onto you.
Connection is only worth it if you are allowed to be your true self. If you have to be anything else for them or have to tip-toe or remain quiet, then you're doing it wrong (the relationship only serves them that way). If your gut says there is something seriously wrong, don't ignore it; lay it all out. Please, learn from my mistakes, so that you don't have to live them too.
- C. - first boyfriend, 3 years (part of it during high school). Ended because he cheated on me with a mutual friend, and hid it for a year, though I always knew something was going on.
My dating life has been a tragic comedy. There were many years of keeping away from any and all relationships or dating, and instead focusing on my work or learning; especially, given the amount of men I came across who were wholly uninteresting or creepers (stalking me or showing up at my work, or spying on me to approach my friends to ask about me). Then, enduring a trauma that left me reeling, and needing time to heal.
- I stayed single for about 4 years.
- T.- 2 years. Ended after a lot of abuse and manipulation, and me coming to the end of my rope when I caught him cheating with his boss. Again, my intuition told me something was wrong, but I felt trapped in the situation until I had proof.
- 2 years single, pursuing work and non-for profit, college, etc.
- D. - Nearly 10 years of a modicum of bliss, and a torrent of pure hell. Ended because I finally found my voice, and woke up from the slumber I had succumbed to due to the years of psychological torment. I still blame myself for a lot of it, though. I wish he would seek help, as I care for him deeply despite everything. Gladly, I received the most precious gift from the fires of that relationship; a rare and precious jewel that I hold most dear.
Be discerning, friends. There is a huge difference between someone who simply has a lot of baggage that they need to unpack, and someone who will psychologically mess you up due to their own demons that they aren't willing to work through in a healthy way. One way to tell? If they can acknowledge the baggage or what they went through and are seeking ways to heal. If they are not willing to look at it, or admit it, then this a huge red flag; especially so if they highlight your own inadequacies so that the focus is shifted back onto you.
Connection is only worth it if you are allowed to be your true self. If you have to be anything else for them or have to tip-toe or remain quiet, then you're doing it wrong (the relationship only serves them that way). If your gut says there is something seriously wrong, don't ignore it; lay it all out. Please, learn from my mistakes, so that you don't have to live them too.
please don't read this... (sorry, i didn't read anyone else's... i don't want anyone to read mine... i just wanted to have it out there... you were warned.)
my first was a 4.5 year span with a guy only four months younger than my mom... who was already married and was friends with his stepson... (really weird relationship... yet also the only real love i ever experienced.)
my next was with a girl who decided that it was a wonderful birthday present to call the cops on the previous relationship and swoon me with affection... that lasted a month and a half...
after a couple years of being single...
i ended up with a gay guy... who was HIV positive... which the relation lasted until he r@ped me at his ex-boyfriends trailor... he was basically a gay Trump on a rampage with Omaha LGBT (which he was transphobic and i had just recent came out...) he was nearly fifteen years older...
after about a half a year... i went up to Maine and got with a guy who was Satanic... and had lived with this mother who beat her children... it was also the start of my depression as a bunch of shit went down.
when i got back to omaha and a few months later... i ended up going to a trans woman's place... in which our source of income was "body rubs with the option of happy endings." i had enough of that and one of our clients was a woman... whom then i started seeing on the side... which then moved in with her shortly after... as i needed time away from that life... ends up she was really mean... and i went back to the trans woman... after a few weeks there was a feud between the two... and left them both... (i found out years later that the cis woman convicted the trans woman of getting her pregnant... which then resulted in the trans woman commiting suicide...)
after this... i ended up going to San Francisco, and ended up with a gay guy whom overlooked with my being trans... (what is it with gay men...) anyways he got me addicted to meth... but after some unknown time of a few weeks to a month... we split and i returned home...
the next one was a year later in Las Vegas which... was detrimental and had caused me to give up on love. She caused me such pain... my uncle commited suicide... and she ended up only caring about me getting a job... (although i wasn't close to my uncle... it still effected me... and she made it way worse...) Long story short... i gave up on trying to love...
however... i gave love one more chance back in 2019, six years later... turns out it was just one sided... i loved them... but it wasn't mutual... when i finally was told it was just one way... a mutual friend... whom was a large inspiration to my music... passed away from AIDS.
Since then... my heart has been closed off towards everyone... so i don't ever make that mistake of falling in love again...
my next was with a girl who decided that it was a wonderful birthday present to call the cops on the previous relationship and swoon me with affection... that lasted a month and a half...
after a couple years of being single...
i ended up with a gay guy... who was HIV positive... which the relation lasted until he r@ped me at his ex-boyfriends trailor... he was basically a gay Trump on a rampage with Omaha LGBT (which he was transphobic and i had just recent came out...) he was nearly fifteen years older...
after about a half a year... i went up to Maine and got with a guy who was Satanic... and had lived with this mother who beat her children... it was also the start of my depression as a bunch of shit went down.
when i got back to omaha and a few months later... i ended up going to a trans woman's place... in which our source of income was "body rubs with the option of happy endings." i had enough of that and one of our clients was a woman... whom then i started seeing on the side... which then moved in with her shortly after... as i needed time away from that life... ends up she was really mean... and i went back to the trans woman... after a few weeks there was a feud between the two... and left them both... (i found out years later that the cis woman convicted the trans woman of getting her pregnant... which then resulted in the trans woman commiting suicide...)
after this... i ended up going to San Francisco, and ended up with a gay guy whom overlooked with my being trans... (what is it with gay men...) anyways he got me addicted to meth... but after some unknown time of a few weeks to a month... we split and i returned home...
the next one was a year later in Las Vegas which... was detrimental and had caused me to give up on love. She caused me such pain... my uncle commited suicide... and she ended up only caring about me getting a job... (although i wasn't close to my uncle... it still effected me... and she made it way worse...) Long story short... i gave up on trying to love...
however... i gave love one more chance back in 2019, six years later... turns out it was just one sided... i loved them... but it wasn't mutual... when i finally was told it was just one way... a mutual friend... whom was a large inspiration to my music... passed away from AIDS.
Since then... my heart has been closed off towards everyone... so i don't ever make that mistake of falling in love again...
April
Normal Weirdo :)
- MBTI
- INFJ
- Enneagram
- 296 sx/so
Serious ones... two. But I've had a couple others that lasted a few months. So in reality, 4.
April
Normal Weirdo :)
- MBTI
- INFJ
- Enneagram
- 296 sx/so
It said don't read, so naturally I did, because I'm nosy.
But wow. Oh my God. I am so sorry. I felt so much pain reading all that. I understand so much. I'm so sorry you haven't gotten to be loved like you need... like you deserve to be.
Hugs.
April
Normal Weirdo :)
- MBTI
- INFJ
- Enneagram
- 296 sx/so
hippie
Newbie
- MBTI
- INFJ-T
i have to agree never in my life had i ignored what my gut was telling me it was to much for me to take in or belive ,6 years i watched and felt it unfold , what sucks is my one close friend says damn man you called every bit of it right down to the day 7 years before it all played out , believe it or not , love is not the blind one its trust that will get you in the end ...just my oppion
SkinandnoBones
Regular Poster
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Do one night stands count lol
Pin
"Magnificent Bastard" / Ren's Counterpart
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- 3w4, 3-8-7
Not abnormal.