I found a great INFP description!!!!

[Morgain]

Here is a very extensive description of INFPs from the book of Lenore Thompson:

http://www.showerpress.com/blog/?p=720

It left my like this

have we met????

it completely, 100 percents describes me. Nothing about the whiny, bunny airhead. Actually I'm starting to believe that the common INFP descriptions tell you more about how INFPs are perceived my others and tell you totally nothing about "what it is like to be an INFP"

you should totally read the whole description but here are some paragraphs about cognitive functions that totally explain some unclear things for me.

When INFPs spend most of their energy protecting their inner realm from attachment to an imperfect outer situation, their least-developed functions, Extraverted Thinking, doesn’t get very conscious. Such types are often excellent at managing time and resources for others but have a harder time structuring and organizing their own lives. In fact, they may become romantically involved with a strong J type, who can anchor them to the objective world, but can’t provide what they actually crave: something to pull them to the surface of their own personality.

I always thought of myself as an INFP with well developed Te.... ahum.... if she is right I have pore developed Te because I'm really good in organizing and time structuring at work but when it comes to my own life I detest structure and rebel any rules I impose on myself.

INFPs need to use their Intuition in a genuinely Extraverted way. They’re accustomed to using Intuition to figure out how to deal with an existing context; they need to apply it, instead, to the task of defining what an objectively good situation would be like.
This is by no means easy for INFPs to do. When they stop using Intuition to defend themselves, their first instinct is to assert the importance of their Feeling goals. They challenge people, question the aspects of the situation that strike them as problematic. This “feels” like Extraverted behavior, but it isn’t. Extraversion moves us to take the objective world for granted. It’s Introversion that strives to adapt the objective situation to itself.
Meanwhile, the Extraversion these types actually require goes underground. Extraverted Thinking becomes so profoundly unconscious that it floods them with impulses directly opposed to their Feeling aims.
Like all types, INFPs don’t recognize this internal pressure as an opportunity to grow. They feel the influence of their Thinking function, but they mistake it for an outward problem. They feel increasingly thwarted and boxed in, false to their real selves, and they’re sure the reason is their accommodating spirit. Thus, they go back to using Extraverted Intuition as a defense, but more aggressively, because the stakes are higher. They decide to fight some of the things that are hemming them in.
(...)
When INFPs wake up to the wholistic nature of their inner life, they realize that being responsible to their values isn’t about fighting what exists; it’s about building, recognizing that they can do things, want to do things, that might not even occur to others.

I don't know that I really get this but this is what I think she means. INFP's use there secundary function Ne to defend themselves (or better the values they hold) against the external world. they use Ne to define a way of expressing or implementing their values/goals but that is where it stops. It is all in the mind and not in the real life. It is like using Ne in an introverted way while it would be so much better to really use Ne and do something with it.

In her theory the secondary function needs to support and balance out the primary function. When the secondary function fails in this the inferior function hits the alarm bell by being the unmanageable child. This should be a sign to start working on the extraverted functions (mainly Ne) but she says that for INFPs this feels like a pressure from outside that punches them to be false to their real selves. I experience this all the time. A conflict between the Fi values that I hold dear (my true self) and the Te logic that seems to be suppressed on my by the outside world. This is because Te doesn't feels like me, it makes me robotic and it pushes me into rules and "have toes" and mostly my reaction to that is to even defense myself more aggressively and become more introverted and go into the FiSi-loop where I search again for my values but only dig into past experiences. But Si keeps me locked into things as they are and doesn't help to move on unless I tap into Ne again, open up to external possibilities and do something meaningful. I have been building possibilities my whole life but haven't built anything real.

INFPs under the influence of Extraverted Thinking are self-conscious rather than idealistic. Their actions aren’t being guided by an inner code, leading them to positive action, but by a need to defend themselves against others’ priorities.

I have been defending myself all my life...

When INFPs first make contact with the Extraverted character of their Intuition, they see it in the same terms – as a shallow approach to life, without meaning. It invites them to give up their expectations, live in perceptual harmony with anything that happens. This strikes them as irresponsible. As the song says, “If you don’t stand for something, you’ll fall for anything.”

yes this is so true. This is the reason why I at first saw my ENFP friend as shallow and ungrounded. But I do believe that "live in perceptual harmony with anything that happens" is a wonderful way to life your life, only a damn difficult because it do feels like an irresponsible behaviour. But it wouldn't hurt to cut down on the strict values "being true" and have fun just for fun from time to time.




any paragraphs that sound very familiar to you????

 

[Razare]

Sounds highly accurate to the type.

Especially that bit about them being better able to manage other's lives.

It's 100% spot-on about how to live a fruitful life as an INFP. Healthy INFP's are doers; they're out exploring possibilities that make the rest of us jealous that they can be that liberated with themselves.

 

[SillyGoose]

Wow, I dont relate even a bit.

 

[arbygil]

Awesome INFP link, Morgain. Hopefully a few more folks will see it and relate it to themselves as well, as they grow into their best fit type.

 

[poshlost]

I do not relate to any Te trait at all.

 

[ontheroadtohope]

INFPs don’t like conflict, so their rebellion is often subtle and passive-aggressive in form. They grab their feet when someone pushes them to do something they don’t want to do, sometimes until the person gives up, or they “yes” people, then do as they like. None of this helps INFPs to find their own truth; it actually takes them away from the quest, concentrating their attention on all the wrong things.

This fits me to a tee...either I commit myself to a lot of different people and activities and then have problems following through, or I just shy away from making those commitments in the first place. It's a problem because I want to be involved, but at the same time I want to be free not to go to this meeting or that if I don't feel like it when the time comes. I probably seem like a very wishy-washy and unreliable person to others, and I really hate that about myself.

So frustration gradually pushes INFPs into using their Intuition defensively, to protect what feels like their “true” self against the imperfect outer situation they’re living in. They feel guilty about this, too, because they think they ought to be satisfied with what is, after all, a perfectly decent life course.

I'm always having issues with my imperfect environment. Maybe part of it goes back to my perfectionism...I want my outer world to reflect my inner world, and that's basically an impossible task. Nevertheless, I always feel that I'm ungrateful for my frustration with the perfectly adequate environment I've been given the opportunity to experience.

 

[ontheroadtohope]

Wow, I dont relate even a bit.

If you're an ENFP, why would you?

 

[Morgain]

Sounds highly accurate to the type.

Especially that bit about them being better able to manage other's lives.

It's 100% spot-on about how to live a fruitful life as an INFP. Healthy INFP's are doers; they're out exploring possibilities that make the rest of us jealous that they can be that liberated with themselves.

yes I'm also starting to believe that it is true. unfortunately I'm not brave enough to be that liberated. There is something big holding me back: fear, conditioning?

 

[Razare]

It's a tough call, Morgain. Being completely liberated can also mean being irresponsible. From my point of view, that's a bad thing, but for INFP's... they don't seem happy if they feel caged by life. As I see it, the only way to not feel caged is to follow their intuitive inclinations, stick to their values, and create things... whether those are new relationships, experiences, or even art. The INFP I know has gotten drastic with this. Hiking trips through Europe while marrying a guy over there. She's moving over there soon. It sounds like a big adventure to me, but she's racked up a lot of debt. I just wonder if she gets over and starts living with her new husband if she wont start feeling the same way she did with her last husband. I'm sure this guy is better, but ultimately, once the exploration is over, she may feel caged again.

I think a more pragmatic way to go about it is to find ways of integrating exploration into your regular life while managing your affairs responsibly. She seems to do this too, so I think there's hope for her if she can resolve her money issues.

 

[Morgain]

It's a tough call, Morgain. Being completely liberated can also mean being irresponsible. From my point of view, that's a bad thing, but for INFP's... they don't seem happy if they feel caged by life. As I see it, the only way to not feel caged is to follow their intuitive inclinations, stick to their values, and create things... whether those are new relationships, experiences, or even art. The INFP I know has gotten drastic with this. Hiking trips through Europe while marrying a guy over there. She's moving over there soon. It sounds like a big adventure to me, but she's racked up a lot of debt. I just wonder if she gets over and starts living with her new husband if she wont start feeling the same way she did with her last husband. I'm sure this guy is better, but ultimately, once the exploration is over, she may feel caged again.

I think a more pragmatic way to go about it is to find ways of integrating exploration into your regular life while managing your affairs responsibly. She seems to do this too, so I think there's hope for her if she can resolve her money issues.

It feels like you have to make a choice:
1. live life like you deeply feel you should but become a stranger to the world and the people you love
2. live life like society things you should but become a stranger to yourself
and the path in the middle is a strugle to stay in touch with yourself and the world around you as well

it feels like whatever you choose you loose

 

[ontheroadtohope]

It feels like you have to make a choice:
1. live life like you deeply feel you should but become a stranger to the world and the people you love
2. live life like society things you should but become a stranger to yourself
and the path in the middle is a strugle to stay in touch with yourself and the world around you as well

it feels like whatever you choose you loose

I have been struggling with this choice lately, too. I like the way you put it -- becoming either a stranger to yourself or to other people. All my decision-making about the future ultimately comes down to that...doing what I want or what others want (as selfish as that sounds). I'm sure some people have found the middle road and are living it, but I don't personally see how to integrate the two successfully.

 

[ZcM4xzkjgzCjytBc]

INFPs under the influence of Extraverted Thinking are self-conscious rather than idealistic. Their actions aren’t being guided by an inner code, leading them to positive action, but by a need to defend themselves against others’ priorities.

My theory has been confirmed

 

[Morgain]

My theory has been confirmed

and what is that theory?

 

[acd]

I don't know.. I don't really identify with it..

 

[aeon]

I could see aspects of myself in it, but overall, it wasn’t a

moment.


cheers,
Ian

 

[Morgain]

I don't know.. I don't really identify with it..

I could see aspects of myself in it, but overall, it wasn

 

[acd]

Well, I just don't identify with this Te part:

When INFPs spend most of their energy protecting their inner realm from attachment to an imperfect outer situation, their least-developed functions, Extraverted Thinking, doesn’t get very conscious. Such types are often excellent at managing time and resources for others but have a harder time structuring and organizing their own lives. In fact, they may become romantically involved with a strong J type, who can anchor them to the objective world, but can’t provide what they actually crave: something to pull them to the surface of their own personality.

But then again, it wasn't addressing all INFPs..



I do really identify with this part though:

INFPs may not describe their approach in metaphysical terms, but it’s a rare INFP who doesn’t see in nature’s underlying pattern intimations of a larger purpose. Whether they write, teach, nurture, conduct research, make art, or devote their lives to spiritual service, their work becomes the agency through which they can grasp those “distant deeps and skies” in which “fearful symmetries” are framed.

and... yes:
​

Given their focus on what it is to be human, INFPs are not always easy to recognize as types. Their outward behaviors vary widely. Some are reserved and prefer one-to-one conversations, but a surprising number of INFPs enjoy performing and may be singers, actors and comedians. In all cases, however, INFPs need a fair amount of time to themselves.

 

[Morgain]

Well, I just don't identify with this Te part:

When INFPs spend most of their energy protecting their inner realm from attachment to an imperfect outer situation, their least-developed functions, Extraverted Thinking, doesn

 

[acd]

I do fairly well in structuring and organizing my own affairs. In fact, much better than I would do in advising someone else in theirs.

I don't feel like I have to spend a lot of time or energy protecting my inner realm. In fact, I'm not sure what all that would entail.

 

[Morgain]

I do fairly well in structuring and organizing my own affairs. In fact, much better than I would do in advising someone else in theirs.

I don't feel like I have to spend a lot of time or energy protecting my inner realm. In fact, I'm not sure what all that would entail.

I know very well what she is explaining there, it hits me like a rock I guess you are a healtier INFP than I am :w:

What about structuring and organizing at work? I hate to keep an agenda for myself but I should do it since I can't remember everything I have to do. But I put a lot of effort in managing my agenda at work since I can't allow myself to forget something there. I also don't care about cleaning the house, I only do it for others so they don't have to sit in a dirty sofa when they visite me :becky: