INFJs and communication with SOs

[Altruistic Muse]

Argh, same problem as this with boyfriend again. Love him to bits, but he is such a crappy communicator!! he's been offshore for a month, he came back for half a day and has now gone to see friends (fair enough, he hasn't met this group in three years for one reason or another, and I'm pleased he could fit it in.) What I am not pleased about, is his complete inability to stay in contact of any kind. For goodness sake. I get a text on his way, when he's bored. I get a text two days later, when I have texted him, and asked hey, did you actually arrive there safely at all?! Then I expect to get a text when he is on his way back, and bored. Everything else in our relationship is great, and I must emphasise that he was originally a much worse communicator than this, and is by far the best with me than any of his family and friends....but bloody hell, is it too much to ask to spend 5 minutes sending a text?! I have been way too easy on him I think, always just leave him decide himself, so I don't think he realises how important it is to me. Ugh.

 

[Lerxst]

I forever seem to be winding up in long distance relationships, so this is always relevant to me. But here are some questions:

How often do you wish to talk to/see your SO?

If you are feeling low or busy, or stressed, would this make you want to talk to them more, or less?

Is the frequency with which you want to talk to them, one of the indications of the amount you care for them?

If your SO doesn't seem to talk to you as much as you would like, do you take this to mean that they don't care about you that much? Is it difficult to fathom that someone can love you, but not want to talk to you all the time?

1. We live together and used to work together also, so 24/7 pretty much.

2. Less.

3. No.

4. She talks more than I do.

As for your more recent post, my friends named the art of not calling back, returning messages or sharing news after me In reality though, I'm pretty good about keeping in touch unless I'm really sidetracked or don't give a rat's ass (most of the time, it's the latter). Telling someone I don't care about something just seems to be a superfluous act to me, when simply not acting on it accomplishes the same thing (you know, minus that whole insulting aspect that is).

When others do it, I have to remind myself that not everyone has the same motives I do though. There really are people that are like your typical Absent Minded Professor and simply lose track.