- Dec 29, 2020
I talked back all the time so I was pretty much beat daily by my mother. A good example was getting whipped by belt before church. I didn’t want to wear those funny dress pants. I hated the way the fabric felt on my legs. I didn’t mind church, all I wanted was to wear what I wanted, jeans. I would have even wore black jeans. But all my mom would say is, everyone else’s kids wear the dress clothes and she wasn’t going to have people talk about her family.
See what she didn’t know is that, other kids would think I was the coolest for wearing jeans to church but my mom would have been gossiped about. In reality, I just didn’t want to wear dress pants and was willing to get whipped for it. I always lost. It was always worse in the end cause now I had these belt welts all on my legs and now the dress pant fabric sensation felt 10,000% worse all while I had to watch my mom clap and sing to a fucking statue. Talking about ...”Peace Be With You”...oh just fuck right off.
“Because I’m your mother.” Was never a legit reason for me to accept things my mom would tell me to do. My mother and I are not close. I don’t even call her on Mother’s Day. I know I’m shit for that but if I could be different, I would, but I can’t. Too many beatings and not enough understanding.
I'm sorry to hear that. It seems like your mum has issues controlling her temper, and her only resort into subjugating you was to beat you up. It does seem that your mum is concerned more about her self image than trying to want to understand your position at that time. It must be hard to reconcile being religious and saying stuff like "peace be with you" when in actuality your mum doesn't display peaceful said behaviour, and is contrary to the religion she claims to practise. Funny how my mum would use the same phrase, "I am your mother" or "I gave birth to you" so it gives her a free pass to do what she wants when cannot win an argument that i make.
Well, @InfernoMink, i do hope that you're in a better place, and you'd find healing for the hurt / trauma your mum has brought on you, not so much because it was your fault, but it seems like she has issues with emotional regulation and takes it out on you just because "you don't want to do things her way".