love, fixation, -i obsess, obsessively, when i find joy- i've the recipe to create reciprocation

[dj-elsa]

it's adaptation, really, right?

Basically trying to mold yourself into someone he'd want..

u could c it like that, if that's your view of the world

it's not mine.

if there's something i can do to make someone i care about feel more comfortable, i am ok with doing that

ultimately, i call it being adapt. survival of the species that are able to adapt.

 

[dj-elsa]

what if he himself is very attractive and could have anybody he wants, also?

Umm yeah I would keep in mind that there are guys who will do and say anything to get laid or keep getting laid

so it's not as if he's being "allowed" special privileges, and in fact i love his body, i LOVe his bodyandhe insists we spend "quality time" doing stuff

so, see, he's not some dog.

but are you saying that since men would do anything and it's ok, then women should also have game for what htey want?

 

[dj-elsa]

because i don't want it to end. i don't want to walk away.

why? because it's hard enough to find people i find even interesting enough to want a superficial friendship with, and he's the connection to years n years (15 years) of my scattered life. we've been friends that long, and over fifteen years our friendship evolved to where i almost love him like i figure i'd love a brother, and at the same time find him so freakin attractive and he keeps me so satisfied physically when we are physical that i know he's not just another notch on the belt, you see.

and also infj's have a really hard time leaving relationships lol

 

[Bird]

because i don't want it to end. i don't want to walk away.

Then he's going to continue to play with you.
Because he knows he can. He has for fifteen
years.

 

[Mogura]

Some guys will pretend they want commitment.

They can pretend all they like, but their behavior, actions, etc. will betray them soon enough. Just bring up topics/words such as "committment", "marriage", "baby", etc. and watch their reaction. Don't listen to their words, look into their eyes. All INFJs have this ability (i.e., bullsh*t detection) in them.

Of course, if the INFJ is in denial or trying to lie to themselves because they themeselves can't handle the truth, it complicates matters. But that only occurs when/because the INFJ knows the truth all too well...

 

[The Jester]

They can pretend all they like, but their behavior, actions, etc. will betray them soon enough. Just bring up topics/words such as "committment", "marriage", "baby", etc. and watch their reaction. Don't listen to their words, look into their eyes. All INFJs have this ability (i.e., bullsh*t detection) in them.

Of course, if the INFJ is in denial or trying to lie to themselves because they themeselves can't handle the truth, it complicates matters. But that only occurs when/because the INFJ knows the truth all too well...

It could also be that some people just don't want babies.
Or want to be married.

Does this mean that they only want sex?

I can also safely conclude that you've never been deceived by anyone?

You INFJs keep amazing me.

(I'm sorry if this comes across as snarky or sarcastic.
It wasn't meant to be like that, but I'm tired and have trouble phrasing it in a different way.)

 

[rawr]

I'm very, very curious, why would you even read that post if you're totally not on the same page personality-wise?

because, type is not everything, in regards to both personality, and the person as a whole. Also, even if you are not on the same page, a difference of opinions never hurt anyone in and of itself.
am i making sense?

tambien, bienvenidos.

 

[Mogura]

It could also be that some people just don't want babies.
Or want to be married.

Does this mean that they only want sex?

Those were just examples I suggested using. YMMV. Really the point is to observe their reaction, not to actually lay down plans for a marriage or parenthood.

Of course, there are committment-embracing individuals out there that don't want to get married, have children, etc.

However, if they make promises of committment-based lifestyle options and fail to follow through or to live up to their words, then what does that say?

I wouldn't say it's an INFJ thing. People across the Type spectrum just hate being d*cked around in relationships...

 

[ZcM4xzkjgzCjytBc]

They can pretend all they like, but their behavior, actions, etc. will betray them soon enough. Just bring up topics/words such as "committment", "marriage", "baby", etc. and watch their reaction. Don't listen to their words, look into their eyes. All INFJs have this ability (i.e., bullsh*t detection) in them.

mhmm

Bring up marriage and kids within a short amount of time of meeting, the guy should be running.

I know no one said anything about "within a short amount of time of meeting", but that is the time frame of which my statement applied. It is implied that his intentions from the beginning would not span very far into the future.

For you or any other INFJ to weed these types of guys out is another story since I'm being a bit more general to include all females.