Merkabah

[Skarekrow]

This is so relatable for me when I think back to my childhood (wearing my emotions on my sleeve),
I would say the rocks are good representations of words and the damage they do.
(I especially like that she has a mask with a smile on it)
Anyone else?

​

 

[JennyDaniella]

View attachment 46745

This is so relatable for me when I think back to my childhood (wearing my emotions on my sleeve),
I would say the rocks are good representations of words and the damage they do.
(I especially like that she has a mask with a smile on it)
Anyone else?

​

Very symbolic picture Skare.

First thing I saw on this picture, my eyes immediately gazed on the cracks and could already strongly relate—especially the mask bit.

My childhood wasn’t exactly normal or happy persay. I love my family dearly, but it was pretty effin dysfunctional. Couldn’t bring friends over due to embarrassment and shame. Never went to Disneyland or did anything fun as a family because my parents would be already screaming each other’s heads off by the five minute mark in the car. Absolutely awful and can’t say I miss those memories.

Funny and strangely enough in a fucked up way, once my parents divorced, things settled and became more normalized. Goes to tell you that sometimes when parents stay together for the children despite emotional abuse and shoutings, you are doing more harm than good on the children’s wellbeing. No family is perfect I suppose.

Won’t lie and say it didn’t affect me a lot as person and contributed to some of my depression as a teenager. But I’m happy to say I’m over it.

Back to the picture, indeed the rocks do more damage than good. Can’t emphasize enough how much a parent can affect their children with a small word or action.

 

[John K]

This is so relatable for me when I think back to my childhood (wearing my emotions on my sleeve),
I would say the rocks are good representations of words and the damage they do.
(I especially like that she has a mask with a smile on it)
Anyone else?

Back to the picture, indeed the rocks do more damage than good. Can’t emphasize enough how much a parent can affect their children with a small word or action.

I was fortunate to have parents who were probably infx and were very much in tune with us as kids - mum would have been very much at home in the Forum I think She was one of the best people I have ever come across at giving praise - this is the polar opposite of what you have both experienced with your folks. My problem was with the stony words thrown at me by other kids my age and the experience left me very distrustful of other people deep down where it's hard to reach and switch off. The younger you are when you get hurt this way, the deeper it goes and it affects you core feelings of confidence, your self-worth and your belief in yourself at a critical time of your life. I didn't know how to express all this when I was a child and it came out in childhood illnesses that kept me away from school as much as possible. My parents were so positive and nurturing that it partly offset all this, but I got on far better with adults than people my own age until my later teens. This jingle is a bit of a cliche but it's absolutely spot on.

Spoiler

 

[JennyDaniella]

I was fortunate to have parents who were probably infx and were very much in tune with us as kids - mum would have been very much at home in the Forum I think She was one of the best people I have ever come across at giving praise - this is the polar opposite of what you have both experienced with your folks. My problem was with the stony words thrown at me by other kids my age and the experience left me very distrustful of other people deep down where it's hard to reach and switch off. The younger you are when you get hurt this way, the deeper it goes and it affects you core feelings of confidence, your self-worth and your belief in yourself at a critical time of your life. I didn't know how to express all this when I was a child and it came out in childhood illnesses that kept me away from school as much as possible. My parents were so positive and nurturing that it partly offset all this, but I got on far better with adults than people my own age until my later teens. This jingle is a bit of a cliche but it's absolutely spot on.

Spoiler

The picture is so true John! Wounds are healed, but words are never forgotten.

And yes, absolutely agree! The younger you are, the more your outside experiences affect you tremendously when it comes to esteem and sense of trust towards others. I, too, was bullied quite terribly when I was younger so even though it’s been more than a decade, I can recall all the memories with such clarity.

The combination of my experiences at home and school exacerbated my introvertedness and shyness. I still have trouble opening up and trust others easily till day, which I’m trying to work on but am afraid it won’t fully go away.

 

[John K]

The picture is so true John! Wounds are healed, but words are never forgotten.

And yes, absolutely agree! The younger you are, the more your outside experiences affect you tremendously when it comes to esteem and sense of trust towards others. I, too, was bullied quite terribly when I was younger so even though it’s been more than a decade, I can recall all the memories with such clarity.

The combination of my experiences at home and school exacerbated my introvertedness and shyness. I still have trouble opening up and trust others easily till day, which I’m trying to work on but am afraid it won’t fully go away.

It's so frustrating isn't it - you are one of the most personable, likeable and socially aware people in the forum - and that's no disrespect to everyone else because there are so many lovely people here. It's like I said in another thread on a different topic - I wouldn't wish these problems on anyone, but it's a great comfort knowing we aren't unique and can share experiences.

For me, the problem hasn't gone away, but academic success, then success in my career and my family have been a powerful counter-balance - and I mean modest success not anything special. These give us a solid foundation internally as well as externally and I suspect the same is true for yourself, both now at uni, and then increasingly so once you have completed your course and established yourself in your career. You have a tremendous gift of psychological insight mixed with common sense - and express it in a clear, confident but very supportive and compassionate way in the posts I've seen where you have advised someone. You'll be a natural if you go into that sort of work (or any other career that needs these sorts of skills) - and that would be a very stabilising thing for you too.

 

[528Universe]

New Video!!!

 

[Deleted member 16771]

@JennyDaniella @John K

Just checking in to say that I'm listening to your dialogue guys. It's very encouraging to know that people like you two exist.

 

[Deleted member 16771]

New Video!!!

I'm not sure I appreciate @Skarekrow's thread being hijacked for what seems only to be advertising for something completely unrelated. I apologise if I've misunderstood something here, but otherwise that's not cool, not without invitation or permission.

@Wyote @Sandie33 @Lady Jolanda

 

[Impact Character]

@Skarekrow @JennyDaniella @John K thank you for sharing

@JennyDaniella @John K

Just checking in to say that I'm listening to your dialogue guys. It's very encouraging to know that people like you two exist.

I double this. ^^ I was biting my tongue so hard not to do this.. again! but @JennyDaniella .. it's really great to know you and I think @John K has already worded it out perfectly
also... thank you guys for sharing the picture and your impressions and pieces <3 <3

 

[Wyote]

New Video!!!

I warned you not to be too advertis-y lol
If you're only here to promote your stuff, it ain't gonna fly here.

That said, I'm sure sharing your content in a meaningful way would still be well recieved.

 

[Lady Jolanda]

I'm not sure I appreciate @Skarekrow's thread being hijacked for what seems only to be advertising for something completely unrelated. I apologise if I've misunderstood something here, but otherwise that's not cool, not without invitation or permission.

@Wyote @Sandie33 @Lady Jolanda

Agreed, actually.

@528Universe This is not the right place for your video. This is someone's blog, and hence a personal place. You're welcome to post your video in your own blog, or in one of the existing random video threads.

 

[Deleted member 16771]

I warned you not to be too advertis-y lol
If you're only here to promote your stuff, it ain't gonna fly here.

That said, I'm sure sharing your content in a meaningful way would still be well recieved.

He did, lol!

Just don't get all advertise-y. Nobody likes that

Best wishes everybody involved.

Thanks @Wyote @Lady Jolanda

 

[JennyDaniella]

@JennyDaniella @John K

Just checking in to say that I'm listening to your dialogue guys. It's very encouraging to know that people like you two exist.

@Skarekrow @JennyDaniella @John K thank you for sharing

I double this. ^^ I was biting my tongue so hard not to do this.. again! but @JennyDaniella .. it's really great to know you and I think @John K has already worded it out perfectly
also... thank you guys for sharing the picture and your impressions and pieces <3 <3

You guys are amazing. Lots of love to you both. *group hugs*

It's so frustrating isn't it - you are one of the most personable, likeable and socially aware people in the forum - and that's no disrespect to everyone else because there are so many lovely people here. It's like I said in another thread on a different topic - I wouldn't wish these problems on anyone, but it's a great comfort knowing we aren't unique and can share experiences.

For me, the problem hasn't gone away, but academic success, then success in my career and my family have been a powerful counter-balance - and I mean modest success not anything special. These give us a solid foundation internally as well as externally and I suspect the same is true for yourself, both now at uni, and then increasingly so once you have completed your course and established yourself in your career. You have a tremendous gift of psychological insight mixed with common sense - and express it in a clear, confident but very supportive and compassionate way in the posts I've seen where you have advised someone. You'll be a natural if you go into that sort of work (or any other career that needs these sorts of skills) - and that would be a very stabilising thing for you too.

Absolutely spot on John. It is pretty great having like-minded individuals that you share insight and similar experiences with, it’s a very comforting feeling. What once made me feel alienated and alone is no longer the case. And indeed! The successes I have been having towards university and other aspects of my life have considerably helped counter-balance the internal situations I have within myself; I definitely agree with you!

And thank you so much for the kind words John; especially coming from you who is one of the wisest and kindest souls here on this forum. I’m really humbled. I am very glad to consider you a good friend on here.

 

[Skarekrow]

I don’t want to give anyone the wrong impression...my own parents were great...it was everyone else who didn’t know and understand me who chucked rocks at my soul just for fun it seemed most of the time.
Anyhow...the cruelty of children AND adults...some of my most traumatic memories are of words directed at me by an adult who should have known better..
But I was also an INFJ and a HSP.
So...maybe I just remember it differently...idk.
Much love to you all...it really amazing how much you all jumped up to show love and support and empathy to one another.
@JennyDaniella You are incredibly strong and amazing and though painful it helped mold you into the compassionate person you are now.
I’m sorry, and I’m happy you made it.
I couldn’t top what @John K already said about you...thank you for being a friend.
(start Golden Girls theme in 3, 2,...)

Also...I don’t mind if someone wants to post a meditation video so long as they put it into context and are not just advertising their youtube channel.
Like...maybe start a conversation about binaural beats or Solfeggio frequencies and then say something along the lines of - “Hey, I have my own youtube channel, where I make my own meditation videos...are there any in particular that you would like to hear or do you have a request for one perhaps?”?
IDK
Mods...do your thing

 

[JennyDaniella]

I don’t want to give anyone the wrong impression...my own parents were great...it was everyone else who didn’t know and understand me who chucked rocks at my soul just for fun it seemed most of the time.
Anyhow...the cruelty of children AND adults...some of my most traumatic memories are of words directed at me by an adult who should have known better..
But I was also an INFJ and a HSP.
So...maybe I just remember it differently...idk.
Much love to you all...it really amazing how much you all jumped up to show love and support and empathy to one another.
@JennyDaniella You are incredibly strong and amazing and though painful it helped mold you into the compassionate person you are now.
I’m sorry, and I’m happy you made it.
I couldn’t top what @John K already said about you...thank you for being a friend.
(start Golden Girls theme in 3, 2,...)

Also...I don’t mind if someone wants to post a meditation video so long as they put it into context and are not just advertising their youtube channel.
Like...maybe start a conversation about binaural beats or Solfeggio frequencies and then say something along the lines of - “Hey, I have my own youtube channel, where I make my own meditation videos...are there any in particular that you would like to hear or do you have a request for one perhaps?”?
IDK
Mods...do your thing

You are a sweetheart Skare, thank you for such sweet words! I appreciate it, my friend.

And I’m sorry for the experiences you had with other individuals, children especially. Some can be so cruel.

You know, at the time when I was bullied, I had nothing but hate and resentment towards those kids—but as I grew up and matured up, I can’t help but feel incredibly bad for them. Just imagine the type of environment and parents they were raised and surrounded around that made them illicit such hate towards others. Broken children come from broken homes.

Of course I’ve forgiven them, but I still can’t forget; it’s too deep engrained unfortunately.

But anyways, again thank you for the encouraging and kind words. Much love to you!

 

[Deleted member 16771]

Broken children come from broken homes.

You're right in general, JD, but in my experience bullies can come from any background.

If the culture normalises it, or tangentially approves of the kind of victimisation (e.g. racism) in some way, then anyone of weak will can become a bully.

 

[JennyDaniella]

You're right in general, JD, but in my experience bullies can come from any background.

If the culture normalises it, or tangentially approves of the kind of victimisation (e.g. racism) in some way, then anyone of weak will can become a bully.

Ahhh, you’re definitely right in that sense! I didn’t see it from that angle, so you are absolutely correct.

Also, it’s unbelievably true how certain culture can encourage negative and hurtful behavior that usually the weak minded follow. It reminds me of the particular instance of the Stanford Prison Experiment. It’s amazing how certain individuals are more susceptible on acting such cruel behavior if it is rather normalized, or rather preferred in some areas/cases.

 

[Deleted member 16771]

Ahhh, you’re definitely right in that sense! I didn’t see it from that angle, so you are absolutely correct.

Also, it’s unbelievably true how certain culture can encourage negative and hurtful behavior that usually the weak minded follow. It reminds me of the particular instance of the Stanford Prison Experiment. It’s amazing how certain individuals are more susceptible on acting such cruel behavior if it is rather normalized, or rather preferred in some areas/cases.

Definitely. Or better yet, tell them that that's how real men behave.

That shit is like mind control for weak motherfuckers.

 

[John K]

@Skarekrow @JennyDaniella @Deleted member 16771
Just picking up again this morning.....
The memory of the stones still hurts, but the older I get the more everyone involved looks like a victim. Those who throw them don’t usually feel the pain - so the damage is greater for them, because it’s harder for them to see something was badly wrong. A lot of it with hindsight looks like shadow stuff and projections - a compensation for inner shit. I fear how much of that sort of thing I’ve done myself- not in an in-your-face way but more subtly.

some of my most traumatic memories are of words directed at me by an adult who should have known better..

They do this to themselves.....

 

[JennyDaniella]

@Skarekrow @JennyDaniella @Deleted member 16771
Just picking up again this morning.....
The memory of the stones still hurts, but the older I get the more everyone involved looks like a victim. Those who throw them don’t usually feel the pain - so the damage is greater for them, because it’s harder for them to see something was badly wrong. A lot of it with hindsight looks like shadow stuff and projections - a compensation for inner shit. I fear how much of that sort of thing I’ve done myself- not in an in-your-face way but more subtly.



They do this to themselves.....

Agreed! Usually the perpetrators really don’t conceptulize or really truly “grasp” how their actions affect others; just some inner mind mechanism that is completely off and unable to emphasize. They feel nothing but anger—or those with sociopathic/psychopathic tendencies feel joy to inflict pain towards others, or feel nothing at all.

Even myself who I had quite a shaky childhood and lots of hurdles, I couldn’t ever see myself hurting others. I suppose a combination of various factors of nature vs. nurture come into play, and as @Deleted member 16771 has mentioned a great point, all bullies can result from a variety of different backgrounds and history.