"Nice girl" personality or stereotype

[subwayrider]

so i think a bad girl is different to a guy than a bad guy is to a girl.

That's precisely it. Female desire is markedly different from male desire, or it tends to be.

Also, I think the terms "nice guy"/"bad boy" and "nice girl"/"bad girl" are relative to the user. One guy's bad girl could be another man's good girl. Also, the term could mean something completely different depending on the context in which it's used.

 

[GracieRuth]

The only explanation I can think of is that nice girls wont put out.

That's the way I learned it. It kind of goes with the saying that some girls you want to date, other girls you want to marry.

A guy told me once that what a lot of guys look for is the girl who is good in public, but bad just when alone with them.

 

[the]

To me, a nice girl is truely a boring person, more so I think than a nice guy would be considered boring.

 

[894tt3h9]

I always thought that bad girls/guys got fucked and nice girls/guys got married. I think each of them has their appeal it just depends on what you're looking for or what is going to fulfill you at the time. Of course this isn't always true, but if we're talking about stereotypes, then yeah.

ETA:

I wonder though... There aren't JUST bad/good people. What about those who are balanced and who fall in the middle of the spectrum?

 

[VH]

So, nice girls are also overlooked and friend-soned because they are seen as not exciting enough or appealing as the "bad girl".


What do you think

I think that if a guy wants a bad girl, he's just looking for someone to use, because bad girls are enthusiastic in the sack. The rest of the bad girl behaviors get old quickly and are unappealing long term.

When a man wants a nice girl, he's looking for someone to be with.

Nice girls are also sought after specifically by many many men.

Fact.

Though, ideally, a man wants a nice girl who will also be enthusiastic in the sack, in much the same way that a woman wants a man to be a nice guy but also strong.

 

[subwayrider]

I always thought that bad girls/guys got fucked and nice girls/guys got married. I think each of them has their appeal it just depends on what you're looking for or what is going to fulfill you at the time. Of course this isn't always true, but if we're talking about stereotypes, then yeah.

ETA:

I wonder though... There aren't JUST bad/good people. What about those who are balanced and who fall in the middle of the spectrum?

Well, you see, the spectrum changes with every person who chooses to use it to gauge their love interest's level of bad vs. good.
So, I don't think there is exactly a middle, because the middle is always changing.

 

[subwayrider]

Though, ideally, a man wants a nice girl who will also be enthusiastic in the sack, in much the same way that a woman wants a man to be a nice guy but also strong.

I know this is more of an analogy than a statement, but there are those who don't place too much emphasis on sex. They may not be many, but they do exist. The second part of the statement, though, that's true pretty much every time.

 

[magister343]

if you go online you will see that more guys actually wanna bang Annie because of how submissive and friendly she is, her niceness really works towards her being more of a naive tease.

No, I think it because Annie's actress is just so much hotter (and has more feminine curves). This is most apparent in the western themed paintball game.

 

[the]

I always thought that bad girls/guys got fucked and nice girls/guys got married. I think each of them has their appeal it just depends on what you're looking for or what is going to fulfill you at the time. Of course this isn't always true, but if we're talking about stereotypes, then yeah.

ETA:

I wonder though... There aren't JUST bad/good people. What about those who are balanced and who fall in the middle of the spectrum?

In a way its circular thinking. They are bad cause they smash and they smash cause they are bad. So there isnt a middle ground in stereotypes.

Nice girls are also sought after specifically by many many men.

Only because they have a semblance of virginity that is still valued in society and then the hopes with that is they become bad once you liberate them from their hymen and keep slamming.

 

[alta]

How would you describe a "nice girl"?

My assumption is "shy, never objects to anything, insecure in her looks, never swears, afraid of references to looking sexy or having sex, always waits for the man to show initiative, ultra caring for her family, friends and the cat". In other words no fun

"Shy, rarely objects to anything, insecure in her looks, rarely swears, avoids references to looking sexy or having sex, usually waits for the man to show initiative, ultra-caring, etc."

FTFY

I would also add "not manipulative" and "someone who wouldn't take advantage of someone else for personal gain / ego boosts".

 

[CAptain]

I think...that I don

 

[Korg]

The term 'nice' (whether applied to males or females) always seemed so flawed to me - it suggests the lack of attractiveness is due to a sparsity of unethical and unscrupulous behaviors. This couldn't be further from the truth. In fact, I'll go so far as to say that that term alone is mostly responsible for why young men (and maybe women?) get caught up in the persona of trying to be the charismatic jerk / asshole.

Perhaps it's because there isn't a proper term that fully encompasses what people are actually referring to when they say 'nice': a sparsity of self-awareness and life experience such that the individual has only a vague identity with even vaguer principles to support it. Thus they engage life timidly, without direction and are preoccupied with finding some external agent (usually someone of the opposite sex) that they hope will fill the chasms in their self-esteem instead of living from their core to create something that they --and the world-- can be a part of. They passively defer to others on everything so they needn't face the fear of making wrong decisions as that would invite scrutiny and possibly reveal them as flawed, incapable and inadequate. I guess the term that comes closest is 'pussy'. But 'nice' has nothing to do with it.

Ironically enough, niceness (when grounded in virtue) is very attractive. It shows that one is developed enough that their highest aims have transcended the childish need to make other people attracted to them (players) and, instead, are grounded in something larger than oneself. A life like that is inherently attractive to others which is a nice benefit but not the focus at all.

 

[This]

@Korg , I think you are right. When people say "nice" in the context of "nice girl" or "nice guy" it is really more synonymous with a sort of empty ingenuous niceness. The supplicating guy or the woman who is as sweet as candy when upset. It's an interesting sort of thing really, I guess "fake" might be a more accurate description if there was not already other meanings in which we use that word to convey.

 

[Resonance]

"Shy, rarely objects to anything, insecure in her looks, rarely swears, avoids references to looking sexy or having sex, usually waits for the man to show initiative, ultra-caring, etc."

FTFY

I would also add "not manipulative" and "someone who wouldn't take advantage of someone else for personal gain / ego boosts".

I'm a 'nice girl' most of the time, by this description. I am also horribly inexperienced in bed! However, I'm smart and empathic as heck and I learn really fast. So for someone who needs that safety, I'm an excellent candidate. I recognize that this is a small minority... and that's fine. Go have mad angry sex with your 'bad girls', you 'bad boys'. I don't need your affection~

 

[magister343]

For most of the history of the word, "nice" was an insult. It is derived from the Latin word Nescius, meaning ignorant, via the French Nice meaning silly or foolish. It gradually took on other meanings, like timid, fussy, fastidious, dainty, delicate, precise, careful, and eventually (in the late 18th century) agreeable, delightful, (in the mid 19th century) kind, and thoughtful.


It still retains some sense of it older meanings. When comparing Niceness to Kindness, the former has more to do with empty gestures that one was trained to do in order to be polite, whereas the latter is a deeper more willful altruism.

 

[Cecilff2]

For most of the history of the word, "nice" was an insult. It is derived from the Latin word Nescius, meaning ignorant, via the French Nice meaning silly or foolish. It gradually took on other meanings, like timid, fussy, fastidious, dainty, delicate, precise, careful, and eventually (in the late 18th century) agreeable, delightful, (in the mid 19th century) kind, and thoughtful.


It still retains some sense of it older meanings. When comparing Niceness to Kindness, the former has more to do with empty gestures that one was trained to do in order to be polite, whereas the latter is a deeper more willful altruism.

That was just the comparison I was going to make. I love kindness. Niceness always seemed like habitual rituals to me.

 

[Billy]

Nice girl doesnt seem to have the same negative connotation in my mind that nice guy does... I think its because for me personally I love nice girls. I love girl next door types, thats what I find the most appealing... bad girls are not fun. Not in the long run.

 

[Ciergan]

I'm a kind guy but I'm not timid. I just think there are better things to do beyond boozing and losing.

 

[the]

I'm a kind guy but I'm not timid. I just think there are better things to do beyond boozing and losing.

Like boozing and winning! /CharlieSheen

 

[Korg]

bad girls are not fun. Not in the long run.

Agreed.

For those of you who haven't yet done a tour of duty in the world of "bad girls" (party girls, etc), allow me to shine some light on the grotesque reality that is often unseen from the outside where you still naively think it's going to be like a Budweiser commercial of fun and flamboyance.

First of all, yes, you'll probably get laid quickly and the experience of it will be in the ballpark of whatever sleazy, uncouth male fantasy you've been wanting to live out for awhile. That's the short term payoff and, let's face it, the only payoff that anyone is bearing in mind. Here's the long term surcharges that come with it:

• Histrionic behavior like you can't even imagine (hysterical screaming fits, violent tantrums, stalking behavior, etc)
• Eating disorders
• Drug and alcohol addictions
• Psychotic ex boyfriends
• STD's and high risk sexual behavior
• History of childhood sexual and/or physical abuse that leads to serious emotional problems
• Inability to remain monogamous
• Compulsive lying and manipulation without any sense of remorse
• Mountains of financial debt that they'll probably be paying off for life
• Bottomless pits of low self esteem that can never be filled
• Criminal records
• Uses abortion as a contraceptive method
• Poor hygiene

...the list could go on for a while, really. That's just the generalities and while you may not find all of these traits all of the time, you will surely see at least some of them. And that's a lot to put up with for some easy pussy.