Stealing girlfriend/boyfriend

You can't really steal someone from their relationship. Whether they leave or stay with their former partner is their decision, not yours or the person they are with.

That being said; No, I have never attempted to lure someone away from their relationship so they can be with me. I usually lose any prior romantic interest (if I had any) when I find out they are already involved with someone.
 
It says as much about the person being 'stolen' as the thief.
 
I think if you're using manipulative tactics and/or outright deception to make yourself seem like 'greener grass', it's wrong. Especially if you are doing it merely for the ego thrill of competing against someone else and winning. But if you are moving through life, honestly presenting yourself for who you truly are and a superior connection is established between you and the other person vs. their current relationship, it's fine. But even then I think their current relationship should be terminated in an ethical way.
 
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without diving into moral or ethical reasons, i think no because it's just too much drama.
 
christmas said:
without diving into moral or ethical reasons, i think no because it's just too much drama.
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True.

If you "steal" a gf/bf then that automatically makes you the rebound guy. Thats no status I want for myself.


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Would I "borrow" her and let her experience the time of her life in my bedroom? Well that is something I shouldnt deprive anyone of.
 
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I'm always inclined to say no to this question. I've never tried to lure someone away from their partner, and I wouldn't want to do this to someone. I'm also not sure I'd want to be with someone who was 'willing' to be lured away.

However, I don't think it's black and white. I think you need to be careful as fuck when you do it but I also don't think it's out of the question. This doesn't mean actively going after someone with a sense of ruthlessness or disregard for the other party. But if there is something unmistakably remarkable between yourself and someone who's in a relationship, who also feels the same way, then perhaps it might be understandable -- deeply unfortunate, but understandable. And vital to all of this is them treating their soon-to-be-ex with the decency and respect they deserve in the process. Anyhow, it's tricky, painful, and delicate. These things happen, but I'd hope the case to be much more of an exception than anything else.

I think pursuing someone for a fling, lust, or from a sense of curiosity, while they're involved with someone else is unnecessarily hurtful and selfish. You gotta decide what you want in life and how you arrive at your decisions, but in general, I'd encourage granting other people the kind of respect you'd appreciate granted toward yourself -- strangers or not.
 
Personally I feel this is one of those things that would ultimately merit some very bad karma. I would not do this. Also, I could never intentionally hurt someone that way...I just couldn't. I could not live with myself if I did that.
 
Nah. I take things at a relaxed pace; in all likelihood the person of interest would eventually be single. Anyway, I don't need the extra heap of drama or emotional conflict that kind of relationship foundation tends to engender.

Further deterrents: if someone was dating a person who seemed to be well-matched with them, I would prefer to leave it be for their benefit. If the person was dating someone I considered ill-matched or perhaps unsavory, that might ultimately influence my opinion of the person of interest.
 
Korg said:
I think if you're using manipulative tactics and/or outright deception to make yourself seem like 'greener grass', it's wrong. Especially if you are doing it merely for the ego thrill of competing against someone else and winning. But if you are moving through life, honestly presenting yourself for who you truly are and a superior connection is established between you and the other person vs. their current relationship, it's fine. But even then I think their current relationship should be terminated in an ethical way.
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Agreed.

However, it's a catch 22, because if they can be stolen by you, they can be stolen...
 
I agree with what [MENTION=1579]Odyne[/MENTION] and [MENTION=3473]InvisibleJim[/MENTION] for the most part… I wouldn’t pursue a person that was already in a relationship because:

1.Baggage I wouldn’t want to deal with
2.Drama “ “
3.I don’t like pursuing men; I like being pursued, so if said guy has a girlfriend then oh well, there’s plenty of fish in the sea regardless of how I feel.
4.I also have integrity.

I have had women flirt with my boyfriend which doesn’t bother me because I’m usually pretty confident in a relationship. Once someone tried to steal my boyfriend and I thought it was comical at best.
I think it’s wrong but it is not something I would worry about, personally...
 
purplecrayons said:
However, it's a catch 22, because if they can be stolen by you, they can be stolen...
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^^ Generally this.

I don't mind helping someone trying to get out of a crappy relationship, but at this point in time I'd definitely try not to be the person that will get clinged onto or rebounded to. Sometimes that can lead to mixed mesages as well so I tend not to delve too deep unless the person knows where I stand in the situation. I guess in that sense, it wouldn't be defined as stealing anyway. Better to have all parties clarify/end previous relationships before starting on a new one.
 
I stole my first boyfriend, we were friends for a year and growing closer. Well, idk if you can call it "stealing". I merely proposed that he break up with his girlfriend and date me. He did. I have no regrets. Is that stealing? :D

In my life now, if I were single is it something I would do? Absolutely not. At the same time, I believe that if he/she was in a position to be "stolen", their heart was always open to someone else.
 
Sriracha said:
I stole my first boyfriend, we were friends for a year and growing closer. Well, idk if you can call it "stealing". I merely proposed that he break up with his girlfriend and date me. He did. I have no regrets. Is that stealing? :D

In my life now, if I were single is it something I would do? Absolutely not. At the same time, I believe that if he/she was in a position to be "stolen", their heart was always open to someone else.
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Well yes, but technically that is called being a home wrecker.
 
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