Those White People

invisible said:
It's all very confusing. I want to try to stand up for what I think is right. But it seems like it means that if I do that, things that I say don't matter, because saying those things makes me a social justice warrior, or upset, or hysterical, or value-signalling? So that things that I say are unimportant, because my reasons for saying things are wrong, or because I'm the wrong type of person to say things?
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Oh no @invisible, You are far from 'wrong' ....it is OK to stand passionately in what you think and feel. Practice conviction and confidence in this...your thoughts and opinions matter quite a lot in the big picture of life...it is why you were given a voice, please, continue to tell us what you know and feel. ❤
 
SkipINFJ said:
Great observation. They may also be dimensions of thought many people - again, not just white people - don't want to have.

For instance, when I look in my rearview mirror and see a police car behind me, even though I'm not breaking any laws, there is the thought that I could be in danger - especially if the cop is white. That's because, no matter how compliant I am, how well spoken I am, I never know if the man or woman behind that badge is a hothead racist looking for any excuse to empty his gun into me - especially since it's fairly unlikely there will be consequences for doing so, even if video footage of it goes viral.

I have been followed around in a retail store, and not very discreetly. I have been asked for multiple forms of ID when going into a nightclub, though white patrons were only asked for one, if any. I have been systematically excluded from offering an opinion on a thread on this site because the originator didn't know if I was "cool for a black guy." I've known people who will have sex with someone black, but not date or marry them. I've been told what sort of music I should be making (and listening to) based on my color, and what foods I should eat (watermelon, which I don't really like) and shouldn't (medium rare steak, which I do). I'm expected to be hung like a horse and fuck like a beast, to be athletically gifted...but not be very intelligent or articulate. When I walk by a car occupied by a white woman (usually elderly), I hear the door lock engage. If they're sitting on a bench, they clutch their purses tighter. I go out of my way to not appear threatening - even taking care not to appear to be following someone just because we happen to be going in the same direction (even going so far as to cross the street). I'm expected - even in 2016 - to know where my place is. My choice of clothing can actually put me in danger. In some neighbors, certain colors can't even be worn, lest you be mistaken for a gang member - in which case I risk being shot by a cop or an opposing gang member.

In addition to "external racism," there's the internal version. Nappy hair=bad hair. Fairer skin is better than darker skin - the dark skinned parents who delight that their son or daughter has brought home a "high yellow" significant other.

Strangely, the only person to ever compliment the color of my skin and the texture of my hair was a white guy who happened to be sitting behind me when I visiting Lake Travis in Austin, Texas. It was the only time up to that point in my life that I heard someone use the word "nappy" in a positive context, as he was telling me how he much loved my hair while he was caressing it. I was dumbstruck. I couldn't quite say thank you, because a part of me was thinking it wrong to express gratitude for compliments about things I'd been brought up to think negatively of, or at least of as being inferior.
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Reading this pains me..it saddens me to hear you've been victimized by others fear, lack of knowledge and bigotry. This type of thing is generational as folks teach their children to behave in such ways. I'm hoping you don't allow the sting of it all to cloud who it is you are meant to be in this life ...<3hugz.
 
Sandie33 said:
Reading this pains me..it saddens me to hear you've been victimized by others fear, lack of knowledge and bigotry. This type of thing is generational as folks teach their children to behave in such ways. I'm hoping you don't allow the sting of it all to cloud who it is you are meant to be in this life ...<3hugz.
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@Sandie33, I thank you for the kind words and hugs. I no longer let these things pain or sadden me. I look for my place in all of this and set about to do my part. There are people who think these thinks are not happening or that they are happening because of something I did to deserve that. When I encounter someone like that in person, I address it them, and usually to a very positive outcome. That's not an effort I'm willing to make online.

But election day showed that I am even more in the minority than I realized, and he certainly in the majority. I'm sure that since Tuesday, a lot of people have said "we got our country back!" The last eight years and this week in particular have shown me that we haven't come so far after all. As I wrote in a song, "we're not in chains, but not quite so free."
 
Yeah that big ol' swath of red hasn't changed much. It's easy to forget in the cities, particularly after eight years.
 
Vict said:
Yeah that big ol' swath of red hasn't changed much. It's easy to forget in the cities, particularly after eight years.
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Actually, I've found it quite evident, especially over these past eight years, and especially in the cities, where all the riots I know of have taken place. MY OPINION ONLY: this country was not ready for a black president. In '08, it could have possibly dealt with a white female president, but no matter how much charisma Barak Obama has, the majority of the people didn't want him as their president.

But a better option wasn't available in white at the time. The candidate with the best chance to win the presidency shot herself in the foot campaigning too aggressively too soon. Had she not gone at Obama so aggressively, she would have gotten the nomination, and I'm pretty sure, the presidency. Obama probably would have been VP.

Prior to his presidency, people who dared criticize George W. Bush were accused of being unpatriotic. Remember the Dixie Chicks receiving death threats for speaking out against him? But for the last eight years, it's been fine to not just criticize him but to question his nationality, make derogatory racial marks about him, you name it. When that woman was televised saying "I want my country back!" I took that to mean that "her country" is not a country run by a black man.

63% of white men and 53% of white woman voted for Donald Trump (compared to 8% of blacks, 14% who identify as LGBT, 29% each of Asians and Latinos). I think that's about more than just race. That's also about gender. Among white Americans, it appears the majority of them want a white male for their country, even one who makes it a practice of using ill manners and bullying as part of his campaign.

At present, 63% of Americans are non-hispanic white. That percentage is expected to be below 50% by 2045. In the meantime, the majority of white Americans got what they want, even though more voters in totality did not. But I'll add what I've thought about in regards to (but not limited to) previous election outcomes: be careful what you wish for.

If - if - Mr. Trump is serious about doing things for the American people, due to his race and political position, he will unlikely meet the resistance that Mr. Obama was plagued with. But the same may hold true if he intends otherwise. Time will tell. I won't sit around reading the predictions of harried, panic-stricken fellow humans, because ultimately, they don't necessarily know. Hell, I don't know what I'm doing in the next minutes. Instead, I'll keep my focus on what's going positively. I will find something in this to be grateful for (for instance: he's not GWB, SP or KW. If you can't figure either of those out, ask me in a private conversation).
 
SkipINFJ said:
Actually, I've found it quite evident, especially over these past eight years, and especially in the cities, where all the riots I know of have taken place. MY OPINION ONLY: this country was not ready for a black president. In '08, it could have possibly dealt with a white female president, but no matter how much charisma Barak Obama has, the majority of the people didn't want him as their president.

But a better option wasn't available in white at the time. The candidate with the best chance to win the presidency shot herself in the foot campaigning too aggressively too soon. Had she not gone at Obama so aggressively, she would have gotten the nomination, and I'm pretty sure, the presidency. Obama probably would have been VP.

Prior to his presidency, people who dared criticize George W. Bush were accused of being unpatriotic. Remember the Dixie Chicks receiving death threats for speaking out against him? But for the last eight years, it's been fine to not just criticize him but to question his nationality, make derogatory racial marks about him, you name it. When that woman was televised saying "I want my country back!" I took that to mean that "her country" is not a country run by a black man.

63% of white men and 53% of white woman voted for Donald Trump (compared to 8% of blacks, 14% who identify as LGBT, 29% each of Asians and Latinos). I think that's about more than just race. That's also about gender. Among white Americans, it appears the majority of them want a white male for their country, even one who makes it a practice of using ill manners and bullying as part of his campaign.

At present, 63% of Americans are non-hispanic white. That percentage is expected to be below 50% by 2045. In the meantime, the majority of white Americans got what they want, even though more voters in totality did not. But I'll add what I've thought about in regards to (but not limited to) previous election outcomes: be careful what you wish for.

If - if - Mr. Trump is serious about doing things for the American people, due to his race and political position, he will unlikely meet the resistance that Mr. Obama was plagued with. But the same may hold true if he intends otherwise. Time will tell. I won't sit around reading the predictions of harried, panic-stricken fellow humans, because ultimately, they don't necessarily know. Hell, I don't know what I'm doing in the next minutes. Instead, I'll keep my focus on what's going positively. I will find something in this to be grateful for (for instance: he's not GWB, SP or KW. If you can't figure either of those out, ask me in a private conversation).
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I often wondered why there was resistance to some of Obama's suggestions - Obamacare, gun law changes - as the changes were in line with Australian policies and law (free healthcare, law against gun ownership) and in line with my personal beliefs in a 'better system'. I put it down to an underlying fear amongst a majority of Americans about the cost of Obamacare and the fear of not being able to protect themselves with a gun - rather than resistance because of Obama's skin.
From the outside Obama was seen as an inspiration - his attempts at introducing these policy and law changes, his care about the peoples of the USA, his great choice in wife, his ability to maintain his values and be the louder stronger voice of reason when the crazy element of the US voiced their craziness.
But then I have only recently realised that I been seeing the events unfold through a prism of equality between 'races'. I notice that in Australia the word 'race' is not used anymore. If one has lived in Australia for over 3-4 years and is a permanent resident - we are Australian. Full. Stop.
 
SkipINFJ said:
Actually, there were two questions.
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If you took that comment seriously then you must have just arrived at the forum. It's just meant to inspire a little outrage to keep it at the top of the New Posts page, which mission completed btw. To think all white or black people could all be cool, yeah right.

Plus Ruji needs a little poke with the troll stick once in a while.
 
the said:
If you took that comment seriously then you must have just arrived at the forum. It's just meant to inspire a little outrage to keep it at the top of the New Posts page, which mission completed btw. To think all white or black people could all be cool, yeah right.

Plus Ruji needs a little poke with the troll stick once in a while.
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It was a racially divisive comment that was read by someone (me) who is on the far less desirable side of that division. I took it seriously enough to ask for clarification, which I didn’t receive the first time around. I don’t see what being new here has to do with anything. Had I been here 10 years before you, it would still be a racially divisive comment, even if its intent was that of a lighthearted jab or an effort to maintain rank on a list. I also don’t see how you didn’t expect it to be taken seriously, seeing how you wanted to “inspire a little outrage.” Do people get outraged over something they don’t take seriously?


Keep in mind: I come from the side that had to ride in the back of the bus because that’s where we were told we belonged. In her youth, my mother wasn’t allowed to drink from the same water fountain as white people, because she wasn’t considered good enough, clean enough. In my childhood, my family and I were unwelcome to dine in many public places. And of those we were allowed in, we didn’t enter through the front door: we entered through the servants’ door, or some other back door. That’s not so long ago, and a lot of people still feel we aren’t good enough to share the same rights and privileges they enjoy.


Your comment didn’t upset me as it did @invisible, for which I applaud him, because at least it implies support and empathy. In the real world, ignoring that comment could go as far as determining life or death for me, even in 2016, even in a big city. There was a time when it would have upset me, but I’ve learned I have nothing to gain (and potentially something to lose) going down that road. Still, it and similar sentiments need addressing. Being insensitive to how one’s words might affect others is a huge part of why we are not “all getting along,” as is being overly sensitive. Regardless of type, I believe we are all responsible to employ better Thinking and Feeling, rather than one in favor of the other.

The images below are from this country's very recent past. Comments like "cool for a black guy" reminds me of the sentiments that inspired these signs, because a lot of those people and people like them are still around.
Laundry Service.webp No Dogs, Negroes, Mexicans.webp Showers for Cops.webp Waiting Room.webp
 
PintoBean said:
We all experience the world subjectively.
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Subjectively- and through the lens of our culture, race, family, experience etc.
e.g. subjectively.
 
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