Which Personality Type is Your Love Match?

Your Match is an INTJ
For INTJs, life is all about personal growth and self-development, and when they can do it within the bounds of a committed relationship, they find that emotionally rewarding. But their vision extends beyond themselves; they are just as interested in promoting the growth and development of their love commitments and gain great enjoyment from helping their mates reach their full potential as human beings. INTJs are charitable and attentive with their partners, supporting them faithfully no matter what they choose to do with their lives. INTJs are self-confident enough to accept constructive criticism and will adjust their behavior and attitudes to align more completely with the needs of their partners, knowing that doing so will deepen the bonds of love.

INTJs aren’t the type to shower their companions with a lot of flowery compliments, preferring to let their actions and attitudes reveal their true feelings. They don’t always read the thoughts and feelings of their partners accurately but are very open to listening when their mates have something important to say. INTJs do spend a lot of time lost in their own thoughts, but they like to use their best ideas and inspirations to improve the quality of their relationships. Even though they aren’t outgoing, INTJs are compassionate and people-centered, and they love to fall in love when the opportunity presents itself.

The Downsides
With their focus on self- and relationship-improvement, INTJs sometimes try to fix things that aren’t really broken, confusing and alarming partners who thought everything was okay. The hearts of INTJs are always in the right place, but their good intentions can sometimes cause them to be a little overzealous. And while they are happy to accept responsibility for making their relationships better, they are reluctant to take the blame when things go wrong, which can be especially exasperating to companions who didn’t see the need for tinkering in the first place.



(s/o is INTJ)
 
Exactly! XNTJs are fascinating and definitely catalysts for growth and change. Some of my favorite types. But long term, it's best to be with someone who gets you and can be sensitive to your needs. Someone who cares about the same things. An interesting mix at first, but idk about forever for INFPs. But I'm just basing this off one relationship with an INTJ ex. When I started dating my husband I was pretty shocked at how easygoing and peaceful the relationship was compared to the turbulence of the previous one.
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Being a 'catalyst' sucks.
 
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Being a 'catalyst' sucks.
NOT ALL OF US feel this way. My best friend of six years Kamar is an INTJ, love that girl.

I also have a friendship with someone from this forum that's left... God, I guess we've kinda been friends for 10 years now but only really friends the past year. I was 16 ten years ago so it was harder to have a good friendship :P

There's something very endearing and childlike about the INTJs brute cold logic and how the infp can kinda give them some training wheels on it.

There's been so many times kamar has said something that would have totally offended someone else. Like I think she once said off the cuff once,

" I mean everyone's going to die I don't know why everyone is so upset about the pandemic"

She didn't MEAN it that way and I largely felt the same but there is no cushioning just logic and so people really misinterpret her. I tend to look at her like a six year old who just doesn't understand social conventions yet. She's gotten better but I think the sheer energy it takes to create that emotional padding drains an intj.

On the flip side INTJs are very good at looking out for me. They know I'm a sensitive sappy human that'll let people take advantage of my kindness and they have stepped in sometimes and been like

"Hey Ruby don't be too nice, okay?"
And I'm like,

Hey!!! I'm not too nice!

But I am sometimes :(
 
NOT ALL OF US feel this way. My best friend of six years Kamar is an INTJ, love that girl.

I also have a friendship with someone from this forum that's left... God, I guess we've kinda been friends for 10 years now but only really friends the past year. I was 16 ten years ago so it was harder to have a good friendship :p

There's something very endearing and childlike about the INTJs brute cold logic and how the infp can kinda give them some training wheels on it.

There's been so many times kamar has said something that would have totally offended someone else. Like I think she once said off the cuff once,

" I mean everyone's going to die I don't know why everyone is so upset about the pandemic"

She didn't MEAN it that way and I largely felt the same but there is no cushioning just logic and so people really misinterpret her. I tend to look at her like a six year old who just doesn't understand social conventions yet. She's gotten better but I think the sheer energy it takes to create that emotional padding drains an intj.

On the flip side INTJs are very good at looking out for me. They know I'm a sensitive sappy human that'll let people take advantage of my kindness and they have stepped in sometimes and been like

"Hey Ruby don't be too nice, okay?"
And I'm like,

Hey!!! I'm not too nice!

But I am sometimes :(
Hmm... I don't even know if I'm even INTJ, to be honest.
 
That's just my experience. Probably should not have made that blanket statement.
And actually @Misadventure may be different. She said she's married to an INTJ.
The thing is, INFPs are really up there on my list of types I like. ENFPs > INFPs > Intuitives > Everyone else.

I wouldn't mind one to stick around, though.

Don't get me wrong, I'm not upset, I was joking, but it's like you were saying that we're only good for sparking some growth and should be discarded when that's all over and done with.
 
The thing is, INFPs are really up there on my list of types I like. ENFPs > INFPs > Intuitives > Everyone else.

I wouldn't mind one to stick around, though.

Don't get me wrong, I'm not upset, I was joking, but it's like you were saying that we're only good for sparking some growth and should be discarded when that's all over and done with.

I think it's a really challenging combo because the weakness of one seems to be the others strength. So it forces people to develop those aspects of themselves. Which is a good thing. That's what I meant. And I think it's a mutual thing. An opposites attract thing. But for me, it just wasn't sustainable because I don't like a lot of conflict. I realized I needed someone nurturing and empathetic who didn't take me to task every time I couldn't lay out my life plan and formulate my life philosophy. I get the impression INTJs typically like to be in charge and INFPs naturally resist taking orders.

I think INFPs can also be annoying in that we like to keep things open ended and can consider a ton of different ideas or options all at once, seeing the validity in all of them. (But it's also kind of paralyzing when it comes to making any definitive choices. Which I'm sure drives INTJs crazy.)

In short, I think an INFP with well developed thinking and an INTJ with well developed feeling can probably be great together. You seem like you have very well developed feeling, too. I didn't mean to imply anyone should be discarded.
 
(But it's also kind of paralyzing when it comes to making any definitive choices. Which I'm sure drives INTJs crazy.)
Hmm, yes but I think that depends upon how supportive and accepting the INTJ is.

An indecisive person isn't necessarily going to drive us crazy if we respect their autonomy. In fact I think 'free rational choice' can be a value INTJs hold close.
 
mbti has nothing to do with who the best thinkyfeelysensy beast is
it ain't a competition people

What do you naturally default to in your thought process.
That's it.

Carry on.
 
That's just my experience. Probably should not have made that blanket statement.
And actually @Misadventure may be different. She said she's married to an INTJ.
Yeah, my experience with my INTJ is much different. We balance each other and he is one of the best people I've ever known. We've been together a decade and a half or so and we will most likely be found by neighbors complaining of a weird smell and then they find our corpses half eaten by vermin. Meaning, there's no one else in the world I want to grow old with. Ok, well maybe @Tin Man (another INTJ), @ruji or @Free. But shush.... don't tell. (I am joking.... mostly)

INTJ's sorta have a reputation for being volatile assholes, (and also in my experience...oh they very well can be. Weirdly, I've had worse experiences with ENFP's lol) but like with all other people, each person is different regardless of their type. I've known volatile assholes of every MBTI type. However I will say that many people on this particular forum have had very negative experiences in relationships with INTJ's. I think NT's in particular are more misunderstood than all the F's combined.

Hmm... I don't even know if I'm even INTJ, to be honest.
Honestly I thought you were *NFJ. The Fe is strong with you. But that's just from reading your random posts scattered throughout the not-so-personal threads (I'm not much of a blog reader). Meaning, my information about who you are is limited. But isn't it funny how you're perceived by others vs how you perceive yourself? :p
 
Honestly I thought you were *NFJ. The Fe is strong with you. But that's just from reading your random posts scattered throughout the not-so-personal threads (I'm not much of a blog reader). Meaning, my information about who you are is limited. But isn't it funny how you're perceived by others vs how you perceive yourself? :p
Lol, yes! I'm questioning my type right now, though, and so those opinions are helpful.
 
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