Which Personality Type is Your Love Match?

TBH @Asa my INTJ ex seemed to really like me initially because I didn't like him initially lmao. He pursued me after I told him off until I guess he won me over.

Find you an INFP who doesn't cry all the time and find you an INTJ who doesn't yell all the time and you got yourself a nice zesty dressing! (I cried a lot back then and he yelled a lot back then.)

There's a lot to like about INTJs. We were just really quite young.
 
Deleted member 16771 said:
Oh I get the impression that they're all over the place, I just... never seem to come across them. I can't think of a single one that I know or have known.
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INFP walking in the street:

:m159:

*a wild Deleted member 16771 appears*

INFP:

:m040:
 
acd said:
TBH @Asa my INTJ ex seemed to really like me initially because I didn't like him initially lmao. He pursued me after I told him off until I guess he won me over.

Find you an INFP who doesn't cry all the time and find you an INTJ who doesn't yell all the time and you got yourself a nice zesty dressing! (I cried a lot back then and he yelled a lot back then.)

There's a lot to like about INTJs. We were just really quite young.
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Maturity level, self-awareness, and cognitive development count in all relationships.
 
Asa said:
Maturity level, self-awareness, and cognitive development count in all relationships.
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Definitely.
In another universe it's possible to have worked out. The chemistry and intimacy was definitely there. Probably two people of these types who stick it out and can respectfully work on it can make it work spectacularly as they mature. There's just getting to the point of understanding one another. I remember trying to do that and my ex told me I should just go date a self help guru then lol. I'm sure I went about the conversation in an annoying way though.
 
My perfect match is someone who is:

- emotionally stable and wise
- relaxed and with a positive/optimistic attitude
- interested in ideas, but not to the extreme (mustn't be too eccentric)
- caring but not too social (must prefer small group interactions)
- loyal and predictable
- doesn't party, smoke or, god forbid, does drugs
- has a sense of humor and laughs a lot (the latter is a bit more optional)

To be honest I already have that. :hearteyes:
 
acd said:
Definitely.
In another universe it's possible to have worked out. The chemistry and intimacy was definitely there. Probably two people of these types who stick it out and can work on it can make it work spectacularly as they mature. There's just getting to the point of understanding one another. I remember trying to do that and my ex told me I should just go date a self help guru then lol. I'm sure I went about the conversation in an annoying way though.
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LOL

I have to say that this desire to explore feelings, &c. and enjoyment of it, only really sparked up in me in the last few years, let's say since 2016/17. I would have been 28 in 2017.

The first conversations I ever had about 'feelings' were probably in 2016, and it felt revelatory, like a whole new wing of human experience. Before then, I think the way I discussed was about proving a rational point. I've changed an enormous amount.
 
acd said:
Definitely.
In another universe it's possible to have worked out. The chemistry and intimacy was definitely there. Probably two people of these types who stick it out and can work on it can make it work spectacularly as they mature. There's just getting to the point of understanding one another. I remember trying to do that and my ex told me I should just go date a self help guru then lol. I'm sure I went about the conversation in an annoying way though.
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This is cracking me up. I can imagine my INFP friends and my INTJ SO having a similar conversation about self help and self discovery and how that would go. He'd say something mean, guaranteed. (On the other hand, I know all about how to build a set of stairs correctly now because I'm a good listener.)
 
Deleted member 16771 said:
LOL

I have to say that this desire to explore feelings, &c. and enjoyment of it, only really sparked up in me in the last few years, let's say since 2016/17. I would have been 28 in 2017.

The first conversations I ever had about 'feelings' were probably in 2016, and it felt revelatory, like a whole new wing of human experience. Before then, I think the way I discussed was about proving a rational point. I've changed an enormous amount.
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In my life, I've had 3 major relationships that impacted me greatly. This was one of them. And for the better despite it not working out. Before knowing my ex I had little discipline. I learned how to structure my emotions and thoughts. I developed my critical thinking skills. We often had really great discussions and debates. He was always teaching me something. It was contentious but challenging and I did grow from knowing him. He helped me become a more stable and stronger person and I think I helped him access his more sensitive side.

I know that he had personal revelations as a result, too. I remember him saying that he had discovered that he was able to feel things he didn't think possible, or that he was capable of feeling. One of the saddest things after breaking up was hearing that he had all these feelings now (about the relationship and just life in general)and had no idea what to do with them.
 
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Deleted member 16771 said:
Oh I get the impression that they're all over the place, I just... never seem to come across them. I can't think of a single one that I know or have known.
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They're hiding in the shadows. Even when walking down the street, they're conveniently on the side of the street where they're in the shade engulfed by literal and figurative darkness.
 
Ren said:
I honestly don't have a clue what you're talking about ruru
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good...


tenor.gif
 
acd said:
In my life, I've had 3 major relationships that impacted me greatly. This was one of them. And for the better despite it not working out. Before knowing my ex I had little discipline. I learned how to structure my emotions and thoughts. I developed my critical thinking skills. We often had really great discussions and debates. He was always teaching me something. It was contentious but challenging and I did grow from knowing him. He helped me become a more stable and stronger person and I think I helped him access his more sensitive side.

I know that he had personal revelations as a result, too. I remember him saying that he had discovered that he was able to feel things he didn't think possible, or that he was capable of feeling. One of the saddest things after breaking up was hearing that he had all these feelings now (about the relationship and just life in general)and had no idea what to do with them.
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He sounds like a useful little catalyst :neutral: (joking)

So what's he up to these days? Do you ever hear from him?
 
philostam said:
My perfect match is someone who is:

- emotionally stable and wise
- relaxed and with a positive/optimistic attitude
- interested in ideas, but not to the extreme (mustn't be too eccentric)
- caring but not too social (must prefer small group interactions)
- loyal and predictable
- doesn't party, smoke or, god forbid, does drugs
- has a sense of humor and laughs a lot (the latter is a bit more optional)

To be honest I already have that. :hearteyes:
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Sounds pretty perfect indeed :hearteyes:

When you say predictable, do you mean that you don't necessarily want your partner to surprise you very often?

As in, it's not something you particularly value. Or did you mean reliable?
 
acd said:
In my life, I've had 3 major relationships that impacted me greatly. This was one of them. And for the better despite it not working out. Before knowing my ex I had little discipline. I learned how to structure my emotions and thoughts. I developed my critical thinking skills. We often had really great discussions and debates. He was always teaching me something. It was contentious but challenging and I did grow from knowing him. He helped me become a more stable and stronger person and I think I helped him access his more sensitive side.

I know that he had personal revelations as a result, too. I remember him saying that he had discovered that he was able to feel things he didn't think possible, or that he was capable of feeling. One of the saddest things after breaking up was hearing that he had all these feelings now (about the relationship and just life in general)and had no idea what to do with them.
Click to expand...

<3 The best part of relationships that end is recognizing how it benefited us.
I think I would have destroyed my relationship with my SO if I didn't learn from those before him. My ideal relationship model growing up was between an INTP and an ESFJ. My observation: INTPs are dedicated and romantic partners. ESFJs are Fe doms. It gave me unrealistic expectations.
 
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