[INFJ] Why do ENFPs like us?

[Parker]

I've been reading a ton about ENFPs and INFJs interacting but I haven't found anything that satisfied my curiosity of why they seem drawn to one another. I knew an ENFP for a little while but couldn't figure out why he wanted to talk to me so much. I hadn't told him anything about myself except what he knew from the assignments I turned in, so I had no idea what he was finding so interesting. Please share any thoughts or experiences with this. Thanks.

I’d like to know this too! My mom and my best friend David are both ENFPS! David has been my first best friend in awhile, so finding out he was an ENFP was crazy! My mom and I are like two peas in a pod, and she’s loved David ever since she met him. I think it’s a wonderful coincidence.

 

[Wyote]

I’d like to know this too! My mom and my best friend David are both ENFPS! David has been my first best friend in awhile, so finding out he was an ENFP was crazy! My mom and I are like two peas in a pod, and she’s loved David ever since she met him. I think it’s a wonderful coincidence.

I don't know what you have learned about mbti yet, but it has a lot to do with the cognitive functions.
They are the exact opposite functionally, while function usage is exactly the same.
INFJ - Ni Fe Ti Se
ENFP - Ne Fi Te Si

So the interaction is almost like seeing ourselves, but in a wildly different way

 

[Parker]

I don't know what you have learned about mbti yet, but it has a lot to do with the cognitive functions.
They are the exact opposite functionally, while function usage is exactly the same.
INFJ - Ni Fe Ti Se
ENFP - Ne Fi Te Si

So the interaction is almost like seeing ourselves, but in a wildly different way

Yes, I’m aware! However, there’s still a lot of unanswered questions. I should’ve made that clear. My apologies.

 

[Wyote]

there’s still a lot of unanswered questions

Did you mean in some sort of cosmic sense? Like why do infjs and enfps find themselves in close range? lol

 

[Parker]

XEee6

Did you mean in some sort of cosmic sense? Like why do infjs and enfps find themselves in close range? lol

In a way, but also I’m thinking about this girl Sarah. She’s really outgoing, but struggles with her confidence. She’s also always trying to talk to me, and at the end of last year, she started crying as she told me how I’m a great person and she really wants to be friends. Don’t get me wrong, she’s great! It’s just kinda weird because no one has ever cried to me telling me how much they want to be around me. It’s overwhelming because she’s constantly telling me she loves me and that I’m great. Now, while I’m flattered, enough is enough sometimes lol

 

[Wyote]

XEee6


In a way, but also I’m thinking about this girl Sarah. She’s really outgoing, but struggles with her confidence. She’s also always trying to talk to me, and at the end of last year, she started crying as she told me how I’m a great person and she really wants to be friends. Don’t get me wrong, she’s great! It’s just kinda weird because no one has ever cried to me telling me how much they want to be around me. It’s overwhelming because she’s constantly telling me she loves me and that I’m great. Now, while I’m flattered, enough is enough sometimes lol

 

[Parker]

Right, but she seems to be so insecure, so I’m confused! I type this though as I sit alone at lunch, and I’m typing about a girl that begs me to be her friend. It’s just too much to take in because at any time she sees me, she pulls compliments out of her ass every few words. I don’t really have many friends at school, and I typically stick to myself and have my earbuds in (as I do now), so this is out of my ballpark. Stereotypically, as an INFJ, it’s going to take me awhile to become “besties” with someone, and she’s just rushing everything?? She wants to make plans and I don’t even know her that well, we’re just close acquaintances? Lots of small talk, wishing each other well..that type of thing.

 

[Wyote]

Right, but she seems to be so insecure, so I’m confused! I type this though as I sit alone at lunch, and I’m typing about a girl that begs me to be her friend. It’s just too much to take in because at any time she sees me, she pulls compliments out of her ass every few words. I don’t really have many friends at school, and I typically stick to myself and have my earbuds in (as I do now), so this is out of my ballpark. Stereotypically, as an INFJ, it’s going to take me awhile to become “besties” with someone, and she’s just rushing everything?? She wants to make plans and I don’t even know her that well, we’re just close acquaintances? Lots of small talk, wishing each other well..that type of thing.

Yea I've been there. It is difficult to maintain kindness when there is a sort of mismatch in what people feel towards you vs you to them.
She may have some insecurities, but she is also probably genuinely interested in your friendship. People are terrible at navigating how to sort of "sync up" in relationships, which tends to be something that infjs are exceptionally good at. Anyway, ultimately it's up to you to decide if this person will be more of a hindrance to your personal goals or if they will be supportive in good ways.

 

[kfg(atj]

Right, but she seems to be so insecure, so I’m confused! I type this though as I sit alone at lunch, and I’m typing about a girl that begs me to be her friend. It’s just too much to take in because at any time she sees me, she pulls compliments out of her ass every few words. I don’t really have many friends at school, and I typically stick to myself and have my earbuds in (as I do now), so this is out of my ballpark. Stereotypically, as an INFJ, it’s going to take me awhile to become “besties” with someone, and she’s just rushing everything?? She wants to make plans and I don’t even know her that well, we’re just close acquaintances? Lots of small talk, wishing each other well..that type of thing.

I don't really know any extroverts who are severely self conscious like that. Extroverts don't typically need someone to be their friend. They're naturally social and while they may stick close to one or two people, I don't think they find themselves very lonely or in need of friendship. This sounds more like an INFP than an ENFP. I say this, because I've dated both types. INFP very needy, clingy and lonely. ENFP very outgoing and independent. Both are emotional, strong willed, dreamers, etc. but like Wyote pointed out, the functions are different. INFJs connect better with ENFPs because the function preferences are opposite but stacked in the same order of usage. I often found myself annoyed quickly with INFPs. Like their neediness becomes annoying to me very quickly. ENFPs do not annoy me at all, in fact they suck me in like a magnet.

 

[Wyote]

I don't really know any extroverts who are severely self conscious like that. Extroverts don't typically need someone to be their friend. They're naturally social and while they may stick close to one or two people, I don't think they find themselves very lonely or in need of friendship. This sounds more like an INFP than an ENFP. I say this, because I've dated both types. INFP very needy, clingy and lonely. ENFP very outgoing and independent. Both are emotional, strong willed, dreamers, etc. but like Wyote pointed out, the functions are different. INFJs connect better with ENFPs because the function preferences are opposite but stacked in the same order of usage. I often found myself annoyed quickly with INFPs. Like their neediness becomes annoying to me very quickly. ENFPs do not annoy me at all, in fact they suck me in like a magnet.

I don't think these issues are type related, though they may tend toward these directions. People can fall into all sorts of difficulties and problems with character growth and emotional duress. It's more complex. ENFPs can be weirdos.

 

[Parker]

I don't really know any extroverts who are severely self conscious like that. Extroverts don't typically need someone to be their friend. They're naturally social and while they may stick close to one or two people, I don't think they find themselves very lonely or in need of friendship. This sounds more like an INFP than an ENFP. I say this, because I've dated both types. INFP very needy, clingy and lonely. ENFP very outgoing and independent. Both are emotional, strong willed, dreamers, etc. but like Wyote pointed out, the functions are different. INFJs connect better with ENFPs because the function preferences are opposite but stacked in the same order of usage. I often found myself annoyed quickly with INFPs. Like their neediness becomes annoying to me very quickly. ENFPs do not annoy me at all, in fact they suck me in like a magnet.

Yes! I love ENFPs, but she annoys me more than she excites me because she’s so..needy, and that’s paired with perkiness. To sum it up, I think that she’s too much for me.

 

[acd]

I've never met an ENFP that didn't like everyone.

 

[Wyote]

I've never met an ENFP that didn't like everyone.

lolol right tho