Corrupt A Wish

[yokai]

Granted. The bugs don't bite but the drum of their wings causes an incessant tinnitus that persists even through your sleep.

I wish getting older didn't result in such pain and fatigue.

 

[aeon]

Granted, you die early.

I wish people on on-ramps would accelerate such that their speed would match the speed of the highway traffic as they merged in.

 

[Elder]

Granted. People on on-ramps are matching the highway traffic speed as they merge perpendicularly rather than parallel to the traffic.

I wish houses were all glass and situated in nature, so you never have to be away from the trees.

 

[SlowUpTake]

Granted, but the trees are filled with creepy leches.

I wish there was 92% participation in every election

 

[Elder]

Granted. Only the remaining 8% of the population has an IQ over 70.

I wish it was sweater weather already.

 

[aeon]

Granted, but you discover someone has burgled you, and stolen away your pants, skirts, leggings, and indeed, any and all pantaloons, so you canʼt go out.

I wish for whirled peas.

 

[Elder]

Granted. You have your whirled peas, but now you are bored and complacent.

I wish that beautiful words floated on the wind like fall leaves.

 

[John K]

Granted, but the wind blows them into soggy heaps, and they rot away leaving only the autumn ghosts of their beauty, whispering of mortality.

I wish I lived on the slopes of high mountains overlooking a Northern sea, with strange cloud shapes cascading down the slopes and wild weather driving the waves into great plumes of spray against the rocks below.

 

[just me]

OK. Everyone that knows you must move in with you to share your dream house.

I wish for a nice inshore fishing boat all rigged, and a couple million dollars to pay for expenses.

 

[SlowUpTake]

granted but expenses are past due and $1.001 mil

I wish I was a famous movie star

 

[aeon]

I wish I was a famous movie star

In the global blockbuster The Southern Star, you, a massive ball of nuclear fusion, were featured prominently.

Those questing looked upon you and prayed, and you became a guide every evening as your blue-white dot ascended in the sky.

-------

I wish I could cast spells and have a pale cream Saluki as my familiar.

 

[just me]

Fine. Your pale cream saluki is drenched in blood, and your wish to cast spells becomes fire on your head.

I wish to test all loads coming into the states, turning around all fentanyl "Return To Sender".