Do you listen to people you don't like?

I think listening to absolutely everyone is an inefficient use of time akin to looking for elephants under pebbles.

Some times it becomes clear that it is incredibly unlikely a person will ever have anything useful to say. Maybe they will one day and I will miss it. But chances are I will benefit more using my limited time and resources to go listen to somebody else instead at any given time.
 
sprinkles said:
I think listening to absolutely everyone is an inefficient use of time akin to looking for elephants under pebbles.

Some times it becomes clear that it is incredibly unlikely a person will ever have anything useful to say. Maybe they will one day and I will miss it. But chances are I will benefit more using my limited time and resources to go listen to somebody else instead at any given time.
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If you only ever listen to the people who tell you what you want to hear where will you ever get any critical analysis?

The emporer didn't realise he didn't have any clothes because all the 'yes' men surrounding him were too afraid to tell him the truth
 
muir said:
If you only ever listen to the people who tell you what you want to hear where will you ever get any critical analysis?

The emporer didn't realise he didn't have any clothes because all the 'yes' men surrounding him were too afraid to tell him the truth
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You didn't listen to me.
 
sprinkles said:
You didn't listen to me.
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No i listened but when you said you wouldn't listen to everyone i didn't read that literally as in every single person on the planet i took it to be saying that you won't listen to most people you come across
 
muir said:
No i listened but when you said you wouldn't listen to everyone i didn't read that literally as in every single person on the planet i took it to be saying that you won't listen to most people you come across
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I didn't say what I do. I said what I think.

I didn't say I wouldn't listen to everyone.

I didn't say I wouldn't listen to most people even. That's actually quite wrong. I will listen to most people. In fact there's a lot more people that I do listen to and people that I ignore are incredibly few.

So you didn't listen. You got it all wrong actually.
 
sprinkles said:
I didn't say what I do. I said what I think.

I didn't say I wouldn't listen to everyone.

I didn't say I wouldn't listen to most people even. That's actually quite wrong. I will listen to most people. In fact there's a lot more people that I do listen to and people that I ignore are incredibly few.

So you didn't listen. You got it all wrong actually.
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No i listened but you didn't explain so good until just now

But because i heard you out i now have a more complete picture

:thumb:
 
There is a discussion here about truth so because I am a great pervayor of truth I just wanted to say that I believe absolute truth can be known. I believe it can be arrived at by using nothing more than common sense.

Dont breath air - you will not last
Dont drink fluids - you wont last long.

Will anyone deny these truths? Can we say the are absolute truths then?
 
In my younger days I was extremely bad at listening to people I had bad feelings about, or didn't like.

As i've become older, I realized how tiring, unproductive, and immature that game is. So even if, I don't like people, and there are certainly people I don't like, I have become much better practiced at focusing on the substance of whats being said, and taking people on good faith, regardless of what my Ni pre-figures for me.

I have had much more interpersonal success in general doing that.
 
Sometimes it's really hard for me to listen to some people as it makes me very mad, sad and frustrated.
 
Well, I believe in listening to impartial people. I don't prefer "critical" people because I find explanations are more objective than criticisms, which have a value judgment implied. I prefer no value judgments.
In some ways this correlates more with Jung's thinking types, but it's a separate story from MBTI's T/F.

One of the difficulties with the kinds of instruments like the MBTI that is simultaneously a strength is that they measure clusters, not individual concepts. This is good and bad, in that intuitively when we see a psychological feature that's a sort of bundle of related things we can't define easily (e.g. what is a "nice person" -- it's a bundle of possible things that isn't easily defined).. yet, sometimes you get a little bit of a difficulty when there are conflicting secondary relations of related traits.

E.g. the current T/F has a lot of items related to dispassionateness vs caring. As in, being too impersonal vs being attached/caring/etc. But, in principle this gives an agreeable slant to T/F... which isn't always true of people who prefer feeling to thinking.
However those who view this as a criticism should remember e.g. the FFM leading inventory (I think) measures anger as part of neuroticism, suggesting a disagreeable tint to neuroticism.. this isn't true of other versions of the same idea.
 
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I used to. Now I just distance myself from them. I'm too old for hissy fits at this point. It's best to just surround yourself with people that you like and that like you.
 
When I meet new people I listen to them a lot.
I listen to them to find what we have in common. It may be selfish. But if I don't agree with them in some stuff I strongly believe, things that I really care about , and if I see they don't, I don't spend time on any kinda conversation.

I talk to people about everything. People tell me that I can be inspiring but only if they're willing to be inspired.(at least a percent) - I can't do anything if they don't wanna be helped. So if someone wants to do sth and they need help, they can count on me till eternity. but if they wanna prove themselves in anything in a kinda argument, the friendship's over.

Well if I wanna elaborate, I can say that if I can't understand a person, I won't talk to them. But if we can understand each other but we don't agree with some stuff we can continue the friendship even a good one, and that parts don't matter that much.


Like I was talking to a friend who told me she was just waiting foe the day to be over in order to get to work while she could have prepared her lesson plan for her classes. I told her to do so cuz she's always having problems in the classes and she keeps saying that the students understand that she's not prepare and doesn't know some stuff. Well she said she didn't feel like it and I shouldn't do such a thing as well and i should be looking for a husband instead of that!

Well I was like: HOLY MOTHER OF MONKEY MILK (Venallope In Wreck-it-Raplh :D ) How can such a girl even exist?!
So I'm not gonna listen to her 'finding husband quest' and stuff! not my thing anyway
In the end I have to add, that I keep communication with people I actually like. They're not many only 4 or maybe 5 but they're my true friends and I'm theirs ^_^

P.S: I quit explaining things over a year ago.If you understand , then you understand. If you don't, I'm sorry, you're not gonna even if I explain :P
 
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Interesting question. If I truly dislike someone, it's rare and it's for a reason. I might listen to them, especially if it's for work, but I will scrutinize everything they say. If it doesn't sound reasonable, I will immediately discount it as invalid. On the other hand, I scrutinize what people I like say as well, so I guess I am just overly discerning in general.
What did you say?
 
For whatever reason I do or do not listen to someone I like, is the same reason I'm listening or not to someone I don't. That being said, there's a good chance that I won't like someone because what they say is retarded.
 
ruji said:
For whatever reason I do or do not listen to someone I like, is the same reason I'm listening or not to someone I don't. That being said, there's a good chance that I won't like someone because what they say is retarded.
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I think Internet Explorer is great and I can't imagine there's a better browser available.

I also thought Windows ME was an amazing operating system and think it's ridiculous that Microsoft felt the need to release even a single new OS beyond it.
 
I don't listen to people I don't like unless it benefits me.
 
hush said:
I think Internet Explorer is great and I can't imagine there's a better browser available.

I also thought Windows ME was an amazing operating system and think it's ridiculous that Microsoft felt the need to release even a single new OS beyond it.
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[video=youtube;strUIdYbuMk]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=strUIdYbuMk[/video]
 
I always consider it a benefit to my intellectual and analytical stimuli when listening to those that I prefer not to associate with. For example, listening to Bernie Sanders talk about economics has inspired me to read the works of Friedrich Hayek and Milton Friedman. So I guess the joke is on Sanders, at this point....

:lol:
 
As for truly listening, it haves to be someone close to me, because i don't see my friends as idiots, and i respect what they have to say. If it's someone not that close, it's entirely up to the content of what they are saying, i might listen, or might not, guess it's a matter of respect rather than chemistry at that point.

What people have to say is not the whole picture though. What people do and act on their words is usually a better indicator of character. And my respect towards someone is far more based on that, than in just words.
 
muir said:
It's often said that INFJ's respect mainly honesty whilst INTJ's respect mainly competency

INFJ's are interested in peoples VALUES and what principles underpin their thinking and actions. This is vital because competency alone is not a good thing. For example a seriel killer might be very competent at killing people but his heart is rotten to the core

So i guess what i'm wanting to explore here is a couple of aspects to human interaction.

On one hand many people want to be liked and they put a lot of effort socially into being liked. In order to be liked they might avoid speaking the truth for example

Speaking the truth can make someone very unlikeable!

But does that mean that the person shouldn't be listened to?

So i guess what i'm asking is are people able to seperate whether or not they like someone from whether or not they find TRUTH value in what they are saying?

I know for certain that some people are not interested in the truth they are only interested in playing social pecking orders within certain communities

So are you able as an individual to look past a person to what they are saying or is the only thing that matters whether or not you like someone?

This has all sorts of implications not just in every day life but also in politics for example where one candidate might be more charming or good looking than another and just more presentable and likeable yet his/her policies might not be as good as those of someone who is not so good at razzle dazzling people....should it matter?

We see examples all the time in everyday life of the most likeable person gaining support...but are they actually the person people should be listening to? For example...are they the most honest?
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Probably pay closer attention to what is said by people I dislike.

Find it hard to pay attention to people who agree with me - impatience/boredom tries to get in.
 
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