Thank you, Nuzzles! you are one of the few people i confided in about this! <3 i appreciate your kind words!Nekoooo, Eskimo goddess, Words cannot describe how proud I am of you!
Anytime <3 whatever you needThank you, Nuzzles! you are one of the few people i confided in about this! <3 i appreciate your kind words!
Okay.
I've been wanting to contribute to this thread, but I've been scared. But.. I think perhaps sharing my story would be helpful to someone else going through the same thing, so I decided to just go for it, even though it won't be easy.
Like others here have shared, I am also a survivor of abuse and assault. About a year an a half ago I was raped by a complete stranger. I've never even uttered the words ''I was raped,'' not even in writing.. I would use some other terms to describe the event, but I have found a wonderful counselor and I am making great strides in recovering. I have accepted that this happened to me. I'm not afraid of men anymore. I go running outside. I live alone and I'm not paranoid at every moment. I never thought this would be the case for me again. I have PTSD but I know that if I keep going to therapy and just trying I will continue to get better and better..
@soulareclipse , I really like the quotes you shared, and especially "You survived the abuse. You're going to survive the recovery."
I tell myself that all the time! thank you for being so open!
I would really like to turn my trauma into something positive. i would like to help other people somehow who have been raped or abused [women AND men alike].. I think even just talking about our experiences can make other feel less alone. No one ever talks about what happens after. That was almost more traumatic for me. Having to go to the hospital, getting stitches, getting tested for diseases every couple of months, etc.. I just really don't want anyone to go through this alone.
Thank you to everyone in this thread who shared their experiences. I hope you guys all know that I am always, always here for you. you can message me any time.
You’re right about how talking about it takes away the power. I’m doing a form of exposure therapy right now and it has really helped me.
Thank you, Jenny! I appreciate your sweet words! Thank you for always being so thoughtful!I just want to say thank you two for sharing your stories, revealing your vulnerabilities, and the courage that you both had to muster up to write these posts. You both are incredibly strong and inspiring, so again, thank you. I originally wanted to reply your posts earlier, but I didn't have the proper amount of time to reply and I wanted to take the time to dedicate and put all my thoughts into it, but now I have the chance to do that.
I want to say that I am so sorry you both had to experience such horrific events. Sexual assault, rape, and any forms of abuse not only disrupts and negatively impacts one's psyche, but literally shatters a part (if not, whole) aspects of one's soul and creates such a profound wound that takes such a long time to overcome, sometimes individuals never remain the same; but I will say that despite the experiences you both have went through, it is visibly evident that you both developed immense strength as a result--- you both are incredible women.
I hope one day we will reach to the point that rape; abuse of any kind towards women, men, and children, and cruel assault will soon come to an end. The more I learn about the human mind, the more I learn how precious and vulnerable the psyche is and how external factors can truly affect the deeper aspects of ourselves and how we later perceive the world, especially as early as our childhoods. The unfortunate and frustrating thing is that we as women face the constant worries about being assaulted and I hope to God that will no longer be our reality.
I literally have my car keys next to me and my pepper-spray beside it, it's this big clunky thing and well, I still haven't used it yet and honestly hope I never have to. But it is incredibly sad that we as women always have to watch our backs, even as something measly and public as our nearby Walmart parking lot---which actually human trafficking targets women, children and men at public places. I won't get into depth into the subject but yeah, just a word of caution if you ever park your car at Walmart, try to park nearby the entrance of the store, you'll be less likely targeted and keep a major eye out; I researched a lot about human trafficking and it is a lot more common than you think. Sorry, had to mention that brief note! Heh.
But anyways, thank you both for sharing. We all appreciate you two wonderful and strong gals!
Holy shit.
Okay.
I've been wanting to contribute to this thread, but I've been scared. But.. I think perhaps sharing my story would be helpful to someone else going through the same thing, so I decided to just go for it, even though it won't be easy.
Like others here have shared, I am also a survivor of abuse and assault. About a year an a half ago I was raped by a complete stranger. I've never even uttered the words ''I was raped,'' not even in writing.. I would use some other terms to describe the event, but I have found a wonderful counselor and I am making great strides in recovering. I have accepted that this happened to me. I'm not afraid of men anymore. I go running outside. I live alone and I'm not paranoid at every moment. I never thought this would be the case for me again. I have PTSD but I know that if I keep going to therapy and just trying I will continue to get better and better..
@soulareclipse , I really like the quotes you shared, and especially "You survived the abuse. You're going to survive the recovery."
I tell myself that all the time! thank you for being so open!
I would really like to turn my trauma into something positive. i would like to help other people somehow who have been raped or abused [women AND men alike].. I think even just talking about our experiences can make other feel less alone. No one ever talks about what happens after. That was almost more traumatic for me. Having to go to the hospital, getting stitches, getting tested for diseases every couple of months, etc.. I just really don't want anyone to go through this alone.
Thank you to everyone in this thread who shared their experiences. I hope you guys all know that I am always, always here for you. you can message me any time.
I'm in 100% agreement with @neko. This is perfect. Reminds me of another quote (they're kinda a thing for me lol): "I don't need you to save me. I need you to stand beside me as I save myself."
Yes. I was fascinated when I started learning about the things the human brain is capable of doing in order to protect the psyche. You're correct, it can literally shatter a part or all of a person's sense of self. For years I desperately tried and struggled and fought to reclaim my former self. It wasn't until shortly after my diagnosis that my then-therapist told me I needed to stop trying to be "that girl" again. She said "that girl" was gone and I needed to grieve the loss of her in order to move forward. I ended up holding a small memorial of sorts for my former self. See, before I thought if I grieve and let that girl go, then I wouldn't exist anymore - I needed to hold onto my "broken" self because it was the only self I knew. My therapist helped me realize that I didn't need to grieve in a vacuum. It's incredibly important to not leave a gaping void where the thing that was lost used to be. One must find something with which to backfill it. It was with her help that I was finally able to let go and I gotta say, it's been incredibly freeing to define my new self. It's not arbitrary like it may sound to some (or like it used to sound to me). It's perhaps been one of the most mindful endeavors I've ever taken on.
I once heard a woman tell this to a man who was struggling to understand why we feel we have to watch our backs. She asked him what his biggest fear would be if he had to go to prison. He said rape/sexual assault. She told him that we have the same fear when we're walking down the sidewalk that he has about going to prison.
I'm curious if you've tried EMDR. I did and it seemed to help, but it works differently for everyone.
Thanks so much for the kind words, ronja. <3
i'm determined to live life, have fun, and make people happy.
aw... we can both be! hahaSee, this is why UR the sweetest girl!
