Present for INFJ

TooShyToSay said:
She may like you as more than a friend. I will purposefully ignore someone I have a crush on, even if he is standing right next to me and we are having a conversation with a third person. I will talk to the other person and glance at the crush. I cannot look at him because my heart is pounding and I am trying out of fear not to show how much I like him. This seems counterintuitive but there it is. I would combine the willingness to talk with the ignoring if I had a crush.

Of course, if you said or did something that was a complete turn off, the crush ignoring could very quickly turn into general ignoring because you are no longer interesting. The fact that she wants to talk to you at all is encouraging because I don't spend time with people who don't interest me unless I have to, such as at work.
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Oh. Wow. Haha. I really highly doubt this is the case, because she doesn't seem that interested in talking to me most of the time. But then again my only evidence for that is that she ignores me... I send her usually one or two texts per day if she doesn't reply to any of them, is that too much? It's not like I'm always in her face or anything.

I definitely didn't say anything remotely offensive recently (or ever) so I think it must be due to something else. I was just wondering, from your own experience, what you guys normally do.

As for the INTJ thing, I know INTJ's really well, my sister, dad and best friend are all INTJ's, but she has the social warmth and friendliness (as well as mean-ness when things get stressed...) that can only be Fe. INTJ's in my experience can be quite cold, but only when they're in the middle of doing something and sort of shut out the outside world. I've never experienced coldness from an INTJ while in the middle of a conversation with one.

And thank you muir, that was actually some pretty useful information. You see? We can kind of get along, so long as it doesn't involve arguing about something we'll never ever agree on.
 
[MENTION=10532]Ryanbutler[/MENTION]

Is this girl a friend or are you dating her?

And if you don't mind me asking, what is the gift for? That might help.
 
She's just a friend. The gift is just because I haven't gotten her anything in the past and her birthday is coming up.
 
Ryanbutler said:
She's just a friend. The gift is just because I haven't gotten her anything in the past and her birthday is coming up.
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Oh I had it all wrong I thought you were dating. A friend and she ignores you? A happy birthday card should suffice but maybe even thats too much. A happy birthday text is good.
 
Oh and you text her and she doesn't return texts? Its not because she doesnt know you are texting her. Stop texting her and see if she says anything at all about it. Stop talking to her for that matter. If she doesnt contact you... you might want to consider why.
 
Ryanbutler said:
She's just a friend. The gift is just because I haven't gotten her anything in the past and her birthday is coming up.
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She is just a friend but she ignores you and acts cold at times? That doesn't seem right. She might be picking up the vibe that you like her as more than just a friend (<---this is the vibe I am getting big time) and she doesn't feel the same. If that is the case, then you should probably not get her anything for her birthday. Not even a card or a text. I wouldn't even wish her a happy birthday if you see her. And that's not to be mean, but I'm getting the feeling (from info you provided) that she thinks you are hung up on her and she might find this annoying. Step away from it for a while and see what happens.

She might even text you out of the blue.
 
Ryanbutler said:
Can I ask, if I may, why you would do this (ignore them)? Would you ever make clear your affections?
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I will try to explain as clearly as I can. I don't do the ignoring thing on purpose. When I see a guy I am attracted to (this happens very rarely) my heart goes flip flop and I cannot look at him because the excitement and attraction is so strong that it is overwhelming and a little scary.
I would only make my affections clear if he first showed me enough very obvious signs that he felt the same way, because I usually discount the possibility that anyone might be attracted to me. It's not that it doesn't happen, it actually does often, but I am continually surprised by it because I think he is just being friendly.
Signs I would take as someone crushing on me: sitting close to me when he doesn't have to, trying to initiate conversations, showing up at places where he knew I would be, making an effort to know me, giving compliments or gifts, incidental touching of my hand/shoulder, etc. and/or inviting me to hang out with him. I would let him know by accepting all of the above because I would never do that unless I reciprocated the crush. If he didn't figure it out and make a move, I would probably never tell him and nothing would happen.
 
TooShyToSay said:
I will try to explain as clearly as I can. I don't do the ignoring thing on purpose. When I see a guy I am attracted to (this happens very rarely) my heart goes flip flop and I cannot look at him because the excitement and attraction is so strong that it is overwhelming and a little scary.
I would only make my affections clear if he first showed me enough very obvious signs that he felt the same way, because I usually discount the possibility that anyone might be attracted to me. It's not that it doesn't happen, it actually does often, but I am continually surprised by it because I think he is just being friendly.
Signs I would take as someone crushing on me: sitting close to me when he doesn't have to, trying to initiate conversations, showing up at places where he knew I would be, making an effort to know me, giving compliments or gifts, incidental touching of my hand/shoulder, etc. and/or inviting me to hang out with him. I would let him know by accepting all of the above because I would never do that unless I reciprocated the crush. If he didn't figure it out and make a move, I would probably never tell him and nothing would happen.
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Not that it matters but you are right. As a guy if a woman did that I would think she had absolutely no interest and I would move on quickly for fear of becoming a stalker.
 
An island, or book vouchers.
 
Eventhorizon said:
Not that it matters but you are right. As a guy if a woman did that I would think she had absolutely no interest and I would move on quickly for fear of becoming a stalker.
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Yes. I know. I have been trying my whole life to change this about myself but I still do it.
 
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