- MBTI
- INTJ - A
- Enneagram
- 10000
I don't know if it's an INFJ thing, or if its a certain kind of temperament thing, or a personality dysfunction social/psychological/etc. But one of the most frustrating things I am always confronted with is that the people I most want to care for, the ones I think about and worry about are also the ones I seem to show aversion to.
Actually, I don't know if I show aversion, of if some other dynamic is going on, but the end effect is that the people I actually give two hoots about get the impression that I have a problem with them.
Conversely, the people I kind of deal with in an efficient and 'officious', or 'perfunctory' way always seem to get the impression that I long to be in their company and are grateful for my company.
This sucks, because it always comes back to a central dilemma: If I want to do something good for someone, I have to consider them as unimportant to me. This just seems wrong in some fundamentally hypocritical way. Maybe there's some truth in the value of detachment in love - but I can't seem to figure out how to show care in a way that is both effective and sincere.
Anyhow, this should perhaps have been a blog - but I'm interested if anyone has any insight.
Actually, I don't know if I show aversion, of if some other dynamic is going on, but the end effect is that the people I actually give two hoots about get the impression that I have a problem with them.
Conversely, the people I kind of deal with in an efficient and 'officious', or 'perfunctory' way always seem to get the impression that I long to be in their company and are grateful for my company.
This sucks, because it always comes back to a central dilemma: If I want to do something good for someone, I have to consider them as unimportant to me. This just seems wrong in some fundamentally hypocritical way. Maybe there's some truth in the value of detachment in love - but I can't seem to figure out how to show care in a way that is both effective and sincere.
Anyhow, this should perhaps have been a blog - but I'm interested if anyone has any insight.