La Sagna
I did it! I'm a butterfly!
- MBTI
- INFJ
- Enneagram
- 9
Agree, that it makes more sense if they target the person who thinks they are smart. It's a challenge to them. They probably wouldn't waste much time on someone who is too transparent. I've noticed that they sometimes find the person who is too simple or easy to figure out a source of amusement. However, I know someone who was married to sociopath, and no offense to her, but she was really taken for a ride by her ex. She is a very genuine and nice person, and he turned their daughter against her, and made custody a nightmare. You could say, she was gaslighted. I think he did this to get the upper hand with their daughter. It apparently is a master of manipulation and wanted to get as much leverage as he could.
I believe that sociopaths come in lots of different shapes and sizes and that many of them have made up their own personal moral code that they will stand by. So, if their moral code includes not manipulating people that are simple and vulnerable they will not. I think often they like to humuliate people that they believe are 'too big for their britches' or that have somehow made them look stupid or done some perceived wrong to them. I really think most of them would consider themselves quite ethical. When you are incapable of putting yourself in somebody else's shoes it is quite easy to come up with reasons to bolster your reasoning for why the others deserve what they get.
When it comes to people who are married to sociopaths, I think they usually don't have any real clue about it until they have been married many years. If the marriage is working well for both and there is no big disagreement than things can run quite smoothly for a long time. When problems do occur though things can go downhill quite rapidly and the spouse will likely begin to see a side of the sociopath that they didn't know was there. Gaslighting is definitly somehing that sociopaths do.
Every story is different but I do think that the people that tend to be hurt most by a sociopath are people that are kind. You can be very bright but if you are kind you will be vulnerable to people that aren't.
I have known many people who aren't sociopaths but have turned quite mean and unreasonable in a divorce situation. Anger and resentment can make you very ugly. I can imagine that a sociopath would do anything to get the upper hand in a divorce and custody situation.