Corrupt a wish

Granted, we all get the best but for that to happen, someone must get the worst. You get everyone's worst. Trust me, you just arent happy. Not at all.

I wish I could be a better person.
 
You become a better person but you are forced into marriage with a partner who embodies every negative trait/thing you used to have issue with.

I wish I could sleep for 8 hours and wake up feeling ready for the day
 
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You get your 8 hours a day and are refreshed, but you overwork yourself with your newfound refreshment.

I wish I had a pet raccoon.
 
Granted, but it has rabies.

I wish there weren't so much killing and greed in the world.
 
Granted, everyone is dead.

There are some days that wouldn't feel like a corrupted wish.

I wish I could change species at will.
 
Granted, you can change into whatever plant species you want

I wish days were 48 hours long
 
Granted, but you lose sleep because of it and lose your mind. You then believe that 48 hrs is really 24hrs.

I wish I couldnt make wishes.
 
No problem. You are now banned from this thread.

I wish I were vacationing in Alaska.
 
Granted, you vacation with the homeless people an lose your life in the middle of the night. As you try to find it, you instead find a bear and well... just well.

I wish I was less a monkey than I am.
 
Granted, you are the best flyer the world has ever seen. To compensate though, you are the worst lander the world has ever seen.

I wish I could live in the vacuum of space.
 
As much as feel like saying not granted. I ll grant it....as long as you dont like it there...like me.

Wish i could try harder?
 
Granted, you try so hard you blow a processor and spend the rest of your days realizing you arent as quick as you once were.

I wish I could make a wish that benefited everyone in a meaningful way.
 
You try so hard that you shit your pants.

I wish I could catch a fish without a hook.
 
Granted, you are now a bear and can catch fish with your mouth....

I wish I could think of a wish that benefited not only everyone around me but myself as well.
 
Granted, you start again but this time as a tadpole in a quickly evaporating desert pond...
I wish I could make a wish that turned everything around.
 
Granted every object around you is now facing the wrong way

I wish I had a new pair of shoes
 
Granted, problem is they are much larger size than what you are currently wearing.

I wish for uncorrubtable wishes that can not backfire in any possible way and benefit anyone and anything, without backfiring at the wisher.
 
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