hey man thanks for getting back to me and yeah i agree its sad to think that some people leave this world without ever really coming to terms with their own mortality, i'm guessing being in the profession you are that this is something that you encounter frequently, i mean the ways in which different people cope with the end.
and yeah i completely get what you're saying about being on good terms with loved ones, i mean it makes sense it would make us more compassionate and tolerant of each other and our differences. i heard this statistic once about monkeys who live around that big Tibetan mountain range, the himilayas i think? doesn't matter either way there is the same species of monkeys, one group lives further up the mountain where life and death happen more frequently, and they are actually more compassionate towards each other, performing grooming rituals and are more accepting and generous. and then the same species further down the mountain, where death is less frequent, fight eacother, are intolerant of outsiders and kill each other over mating rights and such. i remember watching that thinking.. man there really is something to this death awareness stuff haha
and yeah i hear you it is tough for me too to look at my possessions and know that i don't really own any of it, its not something i can take with me or hold on to even. i feel like we all hold on to different things for similar reasons, for me i think i am often more surprised at the lack of importance of understanding, that is my way of coping with and dealing with the uncertainties of life, if i can understand something then i'll know what to do about it, but of course death basically tells me to blow that out my ass because holding on to that is absolutely pointless if it truly could go at any given moment in time.
but as you said i cant help but feel its for the best, death brings us closer together, feel less separate and more like we are all in this together.