Corrupt A Wish

TinyBubbles said:
Lol, talk about a wish gone terribly, terribly wrong.

I wish I could be more decisive.

granted you decide affirmatively and unequivocally never to decide again. It's the last decision you ever take.

I wish I could fly like a bird in the sky
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congratulations. you're now a bird and can never be human again.

I wish I could find a job.
 
You find a job, but in your excitement you don't notice exactly what sort of job you've signed up for. You are now paid to shell peanuts, but 2 weeks into your employment you unexpectedly develop a peanut allergy. Not knowing that this allergy developed overnight, you feel terribly ill when you wake up the next morning because there's peanut residue and stuff on some of your clothes. Thus, you show up late to work, have a severe reaction there, and are hospitalized, almost dying during your stay there. Your employer turns out to be super crappy and fires you for not showing up the next day, and gives a bad review of you if you try to use them on an application stating that you have "poor attendance and are unreliable."

I wish I could find out what's at the end of the rainbow.
 
Granted. The kitty runs away immediately after you got it.

I wish I can see myself 5 years from now.
 
Granted. You get to the 1800's but are beaten to death for being a sexual deviant.

I wish I was a cowboy and on a steel horse I ride.
 
Granted, now people think that you look like an idiot and somehow no one likes you anymore.

I wish [MENTION=5715]Lemonworld[/MENTION] would read me a bedtime story
 
Shaqie said:
Granted, now people think that you look like an idiot and somehow no one likes you anymore.

I wish [MENTION=5715]Lemonworld[/MENTION] would read me a bedtime story
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Wrong. Your answer should have been. "Now you're wanted. Wanted, dead or alive". I really should start answering my own questions.
 
[MENTION=5667]Jacobi[/MENTION]: granted, you now ask and answer all of your own questions and become a one-man society, depriving everyone else of your insights
[MENTION=5750]Shaqie[/MENTION]: granted [MENTION=5715]Lemonworld[/MENTION] reads you a bedtime story, but you're so exhausted you sleep right through it

I wish I could win the lottery
 
[MENTION=1926]TinyBubbles[/MENTION] wins the lottery. The prize is in the form of cash with an expiration date of 31 December 2014.

I wish I had a pet newt.
 
You do, but he encourages his PAC buddies to run millions of dollars of television adds claiming your a heartless bastard and it ends up costing you the us presidency

I wish felt like an god.
 
Granted, but all that godlike feeling makes you wanting to be a god even more.

I wish I could challenge [MENTION=3791]knight in battle[/MENTION] to a lightsaber duel?
 
Granted. You feel like a god but you don't have any powers so those feelings overpower you and drive you insane.

I wish I was a dragon.
 
granted but a bigger dragon comes along and eats you in one bite.

I wish I could read people's minds
 
Granted. Now you can hear them criticize you in their minds. And the filth in their heads disgust you. You also lose your trust on people.

I wish I could be in a relationship with the guy I like for so long.
 
granted but as you draw your light saber to slice it Jacobi thinks it is "game on" for a duel and slices your head off.

I wish i could have that secret something just one time.
 
Granted but your secret something is spoiled and you hate it

I wish I had a new car
 
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