[INFJ] Types you're attracted to?

It just occurred to me that INFJs and ENFJs are perhaps the most internally conflicted types. While for example ESFJs and ISFJs accept their roles, the N counterparts have too much pride to be "just" a servant/social butterfly. On the other hand, INFJs and ENFJs also cannot go and become like INTJ/ENTJ because they value people and harmony too much. So they are stuck somewhere in the middle, too prideful to be like xSFJs but not ruthless enough to be like xNTJs.
 
I don't know if there's a specific type I find attractive. As long as she's conventionally feminine, a little coy/shy, polite, and cute, every type has its charms.

Extroverted sensors have extraordinarily vivid eyes, introverted sensors have an elegance and beauty of how they move around and their posture. Extroverted intuitives come alive when there's something interesting, and introverted intuitives ooze sincerity and character.

Sigh
 
philostam said:
It just occurred to me that INFJs and ENFJs are perhaps the most internally conflicted types. While for example ESFJs and ISFJs accept their roles, the N counterparts have too much pride to be "just" a servant/social butterfly. On the other hand, INFJs and ENFJs also cannot go and become like INTJ/ENTJ because they value people and harmony too much. So they are stuck somewhere in the middle, too prideful to be like xSFJs but not ruthless enough to be like xNTJs.
Click to expand...
So much has been touched on in the last few posts, it’s hard to know where to start lol.
But saying xNFJs are too prideful to be like their Sensing cousins doesn’t reflect their realities. If you are aware of much more, which is what Ni gives, how can you just put this to the side? I can understand how a non INFJ would struggle to understand us though. All my life I have only wanted to get on with people well and be a productive member of society with a job I love and someone to bond closely with. Most of this has evaded me due to misunderstanding self, being misunderstood by others, patronised by others, a bullying ISTJ brother, bullying boss at work, passive father, poor friends, wrong job, lack of personal confidence, HSP. Basically a more or less shit show largely explainable by typology and shit behaviour of others. I have my faults sure, and have made bad decisions, but often these were a result of feeling frustrated and unfulfilled. It’s no wonder many INFJs choose to isolate themselves from people, a tragic choice for a highly sensitive, caring person.

We’re internally and externally conflicted. Imagine being hurt or compromised such that others think less of you, but not being able to change their perception of you. That’s just part of the hell of being an INFJ.
 
Last edited:
I really can’t be bothered with trying to work out if my judging function is better than anyone else’s. I’m really much more interested in seeing - both internally and externally. Judging is not who I am, though of course it’s something I have to do, but it’s like work - often necessary, but great if I didn’t have to do it. It’s not my base camp. Seeing without the constant nagging to judge is just so much more fun.

I don’t have a preferred type - if I get positive vibes from you I’ll give positive vibes back irrespective of what type you are. Love is far deeper than type. Mind you, I run out of energy very quickly with extroverted sensors, but that’s very different from not liking them. I love that the world is so diverse - how could it be so if it conformed only to what I find congenial. The moment I start filtering by judging people on their type is the moment I start to block my insight, and that’s the same as blocking myself.

I think it’s important to understand that being of a particular type doesn’t mean we are particularly good it. All it does is indicate attitudinal preferences. My experience of being married to an INTJ lady is that the Ni/Fi connection is just as magic as the Ni/Ti connection that @David Nelson is talking about. INTJs can have brilliant, golden hearts. The ones that don’t have problems that are really nothing to do with their type, and are the sort of problems any of us can encounter and trip over. Such problems stop us from fulfilling our true potential.
 
John K said:
The moment I start filtering by judging people on their type is the moment I start to block my insight, and that’s the same as blocking myself.

I think it’s important to understand that being of a particular type doesn’t mean we are particularly good it. All it does is indicate attitudinal preferences.
Click to expand...

Once again, louder, for the people in back.
prostern.gif


On Point,
Ian
 
nocolaswhite said:
Traditional physical beauty, femininity, intelligence, drama-free lifestyles, kind personalities and social skills.
Click to expand...

I like how this is specific, but because each item is interpreted and defined differently by each and every, it means whatever the reader thinks or wants it to mean.

Cheers,
Ian
 
ENFPs, but they are trouble. Too fickle. I like the idea of my dreams coming true through the excitement the ENFP exudes, but they don’t see the fullness of the INFJ, and that would leave me lonely. I like groundedness more, so I think only another INFJ will do.
 
MsLonelyHearts said:
ENFPs, but they are trouble. Too fickle. I like the idea of my dreams coming true through the excitement the ENFP exudes, but they don’t see the fullness of the INFJ, and that would leave me lonely. I like groundedness more, so I think only another INFJ will do.
Click to expand...
Yes they have a different set of functions like INFPs. Fi Ne Si Te. Thus they are more ‘in the world’ than us, who are mostly in our heads.
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Back
Top