If life gives you...

If life gives you a treadmill then set it to jog backwards, exit on a double flip, finish on a pirouette turn and give yourself a perfect 10.

If life gives you an overdose on Nutella.....
 
induce vomiting by eating a bunch of expired marshmellows

If life gives you an urgent message...
 
Then respond quickly; don't keep life waiting.

If life gives you a broken chair
 
... follow it through (if it's a good idea. Although "good" is a relative word...)

If life gives you a painful experience...
 
remember your New Year's resolution to make better decisions.

If life gives you chocolate chip cookies...
 
Become a philanthropic bandit and fight crime using rubber bands.

If life gives you a sundress in winter...
 
add a mini umbrella and drink up!

If life gives you a photo album of memories...
 
If life gives you a bowling alley, be excited that you're about to bowl soon! Wait, who's that behind you?
If life gives you someone following you in a bowling alley, walk slightly faster until you get to the door.

If life gives you an awkward conversation ...
 
Become a reincarnation of the master.

If life gives you a smoking gun...
 
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