Fortunately / Unfortunately

Fortunately a helicopter was flying overhead at the time, who offered to give the islanders a lift to the nearest city.
 
Unfortunately the helicopter was transporting square groupers so all the islanders were deported after they arrived
 
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Fortunately they were deported to Havana and were welcomed with gelato and vintage Chevys and were all given music and dance lessons.
 
Unfortunately all of the rum was deported already so there was none to be had.
 
Fortunately they had sugar cane and could distill spirits both for themselves and, with some modification, their Chevy's could drink it too.
 
Unfortunately, they didn't distill the rum properly and they all went blind.
 
Fortunately, the Center for Independent Living set up a satellite office on the island and all sight challenged folks were helped.
 
Unfortunately, the patients all became so independent, that they joined a militant anarchist group.
 
Fortunately, they all resented Trump for starting this mess in the first place and marched on his home with ak47's and rocket launchers
 
Unfortunately he wasn't there having gone bankrupt again and lost his house which was now occupied by a bunch of disgruntled INFJ's. :D
 
Fortunately, other MBTI types started hanging around to put things in perspective and spice things up a bit.
 
Unfortunately, this hive of activity drew the attention of a passing alien space craft.
 
Unfortunately, the authorities had paid off the aliens to slip the date-rape drugs to the merry inhabitants of Trump's old stomping ground.
 
Unfortunately they moved on to manic depression and drug addiction.
 
Fortunately Manic Depression and Drug Addiction, despite being a strange name for a town, turned out to be lovely
 
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